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my wife has left me with the children on the day I was supposed to leave for good and she has threatened suicide
May 25, 2013
12:02 am
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trunks34
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May 24, 2013
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I have fallen in love with a woman, she lives in another country. I/we am so happy I can barely believe it...we want to be together so much...however,

I am married, my wife has been dependant on me for so long that I lost sight of everything, particularly my happiness. We have been together 23 yrs. married for 5. have 2 beautiful children 18 and 12 and live in a beautiful small house in the countryside.

My wife was ill for 10 yrs with endometriosis, this was not easy for all of us, she now has an under-active thyroid. I have felt pushed away for many years, rarely has anything been good enough for her and she has been unhappy and stressed. She is a v.attractive woman but has no self-esteem/confidence and has relied upon me to make her happy...this is I now realise impossible.

To justify my recent actions...I regularly tour as a singer, I like life generally and people and am at my best away from the stresses of home. I know I have let my wife control me, I have feared what the consequences of a split would mean, as I believe has my wife. We have bickered for many years and our children have seen and heard everything, it has worn me down so much. I am soft, my wife is hard, here parents were alcoholics and she saw much. I am the only person other than our children she has loved and I now realise she has looked to me 24/7 for her happiness. on tour, I fell in love after a few weeks with a German girl, I realise now so many feelings that I had pushed aside through fear. It has been such an awakening for me.

I have been riddled with guilt through this new found love, we want to be together. My wife and I have spoken at length about our relationship, and has tried to tempt me back home with gulit and her softer side (which went missing)...(many times before I have wanted to/tried to leave) and says she will NOW get Therapy, NOW be happy and can't live without me. 2 days ago, I was meant to move 5 miles away into a mobile home. On this evening while the children were away, she texted us saying she has had enough, can't cope, is no longer a fit mother. I went home of course to see if this were true. I found razor blades on the kitchen table (my daughter didn't see them thankfully). I called the police, hrs later they tracked her down, exhausted/asleep with friends in a neighbouring village. We all slept, the next morning, neither my wife or their friends would speak to me. I rang the police again, they re-found her...finally she would speak to me, she had called the doctors and was waiting in a lay-by for a psychy unit to arrive.

My therapist and friends have counselled me telling me for weeks saying not to give her hope of a reconciliation after our split, this makes it tough, of course we have a 23yr history of nt making the right decision to leave. However, she returned home briefly to pick up her holiday wear for a planned holiday next week!!

 

so today..I know nothing of her plans, no one from the hospital has called and ironically I am looking after the children...is this a cry for help, another game to keep me around and guessing? 

May 30, 2013
12:54 pm
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trunks34
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trunks34 said:

So...5 days later my wife is thankfully alive...tho last night she broke a toe, 2 days before embarking on a holiday with friends to Spain...she leaves tomorrow and is very unsure about when she will return to this house. I am looking after the children...I realize that any plans I have for the near future will be put on hold until my wife rebuilds some mental strength. I am unsure as to whether or not there is  a game plan on her part, to keep me here of course near to the children. Any thoughts would be welcome at this stage...


May 30, 2013
1:37 pm
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onedaythiswillpass
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Trunks,

I think the question here is what is your game plan?  Do you feel ready & wishing to raise your children?  Maybe you should consider changing your focus away from the wife and on to young blood relatives that might potentially be husband's or wives one day.

 

Do you know what it means to be a parent?  It's no vacation, that's for sure, but it's a really great job for anyone who really wants to do it with good reason.

Would your post be written differently if your wife had taken her life?  If that had transpired (something forbid), wouldn't you kinda be not writing about some game plan?  Did you get the latest Nintendo system?  That is a gaming system.  This is your children's chance to have some good or bad imprinting.  You decide.

Were you not present when your genitals penetrated your wife's vagina and your sperm fought to create these children that are your blood also?

 

Think about for a while.  Father's day is June 16th.

 

Good Luck.

 

One Day

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