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When do coincidences stop being coincidences and start being 'something else'?
July 7, 2007
1:22 am
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red blonde
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Bevdee ~ I guess not but I allow it from time to time because I am terribly lonely. Not quite sure what a "thin barrier person" means.

See, on this site I am anonymous. No one knows me here. I can be myself, though there is still apprehension in even doing that.

I don't want to be hurt any more than I have to be. And I have been hurt alot. So I tend to push the 'gifts' away from me, try to hide them as best that I can, ignore them, whatever. Doesn't always work. Sooner or later they come out. And then I try to divert someone's attention from what I just said or did.

OMW asked about my 'gifts'. I was born with gifts or abilities. When I was growing up I didn't know what I was doing.

Can you imagine what my mother was going through at the time...Here was a child that she had been told, if the child survived, would be severely brain-damaged and a vegetable for the rest of her life ...YOUR LIFE... and then have this child who, when learned to talk in sentences, started telling her just what her 'friends' were thinking while her friends were sitting there. I must have created an uproar as early as two years old. Is it no wonder that she called me a witch all my life...or evil? til the day she died? A vegetable, nope, brain damaged? HE HE---not too sure of that at the present moment!

OMW ~ gifts...I have called my abilities 'gifts' though at times they have been a 'curse'. I will talk about them as best as I can.

BUT, THESE GIFTS HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH THE REASON STATED IN THE THREAD NAME! THAT IS A TOTALLY DIFFERENT ANIMAL ALL TOGETHER!

I can explain my gifts..at least I think I can. But the coincidences....I have no explanations.

Bevdee ~ when this dictionary came to me...the first thing that happened was I was 'sent' on a word search. I would be looking up one word, it would send me to another word and another and on and on and on. I had NEVER had that happen to me before. This huge second edition...at least 6 or 7 inches thick - with archaic and obsolete and rare meanings and definitions of words...must weigh at least 13 pounds. yep, just weighed it...that is how much it weighs.

Bev ~ I don't WANT to be the way I am.

OMW ~ As I stated earlier in this thread...I am highly pscyhic. My dad notified Duke University/Dr. Rhine..and I was a test subject. Have been tested about every 5 years since '67 when I started college.
My percentage or test scores have steadily increased - though I deliberately fudged a specific ability and brought that score down.
Let's just say that if one hundred people were tested for precognitive abilities, my score would be 99 percent...the one with THE highest score, everyone else would have tested lower. IN every ability, I am 87 percent and higher. They are also asking me to participate in research on bio-energy healers which they are seeking a grant for funding the research. It will be through the Rhine Research Center.

Abilities/gifts: precognition, clairvoyance, psychometry, clairempathy, telepathy, no telekinesis but it is difficult to test for that anyway ....and others.

Clairempathy...I can touch someone and know what illness that they have, what pains where. I can tell if a growth or mole or lymph node or whatever it is miligant or benign. I can also heal. I can raise the temperature in the my palms to so hot that I have had blisters form from the heat. So I am careful not to do that. I have had people feel a wave of energy like an electrical shock wave (not static electricity) be passed from me to them.

I can also tell alot by touch about a person's past, present and future. I have freaked many people out by pretending to read cards or palms.

No, I am not always 'on'. No, I cannot see for myself, I often negate what I see for someone I care about, I cannot give lottery numbers because apparently it cannot be used for monetary gain.

July 7, 2007
8:29 am
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risingfromtheashes
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wow...fascinating...you couldn't scare me...I accept this stuff exists and don't think you are a quack.

I am sorry you have been made to feel like a "witch" all your life. Perhaps that is why mom sent you away? fear?

can you "control" your gifts? or do they happen and it totally knocks you for a loop? Can you generate them at will or are they spontaneous?

Now, let's get back to the subject you brought up.

How do you think that all of these life events were not coincidences? Does it have something to do with your gifts or do you think that something from "somewhere else" may be trying to wreak havoc with you? Or is it that you feel you were sent to a certain place at a certain time for a reason, like when you are sent to a word in the dictionary, then another?

July 7, 2007
11:04 am
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red blonde
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Rising ~

I have never had anyone help me to develop these abilities, I can control them - somewhat - and it does scare me at times.

Your last sentence describes it how it has been for me...when I have looked back on events.

July 7, 2007
11:28 am
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red blonde
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Rising ~

That 'night' and other things in my childhood have made me quite timid and standoffish with people. I don't have a whole lot of friends and I only have a few close or best friends, and those have been in the past 10 years.

What I write about myself and what has happened to me...they are facts. I am not trying to be 'bragging' or egotistical or anything like that.

I am really quite timid and shy.

I am not really sure when these abilities started...I guess from birth...I don't think I was aware of them until I started high school and even then I would write them off, didn't think much of it or them. I started to become more aware of them during my first two years of college.
I was doing things just for fun - at parties and with friends, etc. A couple of times, it really scared me and others.

Then, after that night when I was sent away for almost two years, they were dormant. After that, and during my first marriage, they came back again. I guess I blocked them out with everything about my childhood and that night.

As for my mother sending me away, I think she did that out of fears she had, for herself, about herself.

Should I tell you more about me, what I look like, etc.?

July 7, 2007
11:34 am
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red blonde
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One of the reasons I came to the ACC site is because of these coincidences and my inability to sustain relationships and, I guess, that includes friendships as well. I really am trying to find 'me' in all of this. I seem to be very adaptable, fitting 'into' rather than 'belonging'. If you can understand that.

July 7, 2007
11:36 am
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red blonde
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OMW ~

How about this for a title for a book - if I write one:

"A Life less Ordinary" ?

July 7, 2007
11:50 am
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red blonde
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Just was reading over some of this thread...this has been my life...all jumbled up. No wonder I am so screwed up right now.

July 7, 2007
11:58 am
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risingfromtheashes
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Red,

perhaps mom was scared of you and therefor kept you in your own yard for fear of what others will think.

if she felt you were a "witch", then maybe she feared others would find out and ostracize her and the family - or make things more difficult for you.

maybe when you got hurt that night, she feared that someone finally saw your "gifts", freaked out and beat you up...perhaps she feared for your life, as well as the family reputation?

Having a child with ANY difference, sets a parent up for alot of anxiety...they worry what others will think, react, etc...and if they don't understand the child, it makes it harder, and creates some fear.

How did your first boyfriend, the navy guy, deal with you? did he know about your gifts? does he now?

It's scary to think that any "force" would want you in such bad situations - like why would that "force" want you to be beaten and raped? That's the part that is hardest to come to terms with, I think.

I can understand if a guiding force wanted you in a situation, so you can help make it a better one, but not sure I can handle/accept why a force would want you in a BAD situation.

Unless that "force" is a bad one?

And would your looks make a difference? You can share if you want.

July 7, 2007
11:59 am
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risingfromtheashes
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ya know, computers are a wonderful thing.

you could easily start journaling on a word program....save it...and you could go back and put pieces in as they come to memory.

like a puzzle.

or you could write, then cut and paste the parts where they need to go.

may help put it all together in chronological order of some kind.

July 7, 2007
12:06 pm
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red blonde
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Sort of makes a difference - I am not sure why I 'appear' to be someone that people know in their life. This happened FAR too often...even happens now.

For an example, this was back in the early 70's, one guy even mistook me to be his ex-wife.

July 7, 2007
12:14 pm
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red blonde
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I am in process of doing that. SO SLOW going though. I still have a life to lead....clean house, pay bills, work part-time, do my paintings, etc.

My first love, soulmate?, he knows almost everything...except for the rape. I have decided to tell him soon, about that, have been afraid of his reaction to it. But better to know now, then down the line and be hurt if he rejects me because of it.

July 7, 2007
12:26 pm
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red blonde
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Oh, he doesn't know that the DD was a he/she?, transvestite?, transexual? crossdresser? or whatever. I don't know HOW I am going to go about explaining that to him!

July 7, 2007
12:48 pm
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red blonde
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Okay, here goes with a description of how I look. Well, this is mostly based on others comments about my appearance.

I have light red blonde hair, I dye it because there is a lot of grey or white in it. I have blue-green eyes that change colors from dark blue to light green and any shade in between or mixed together even grey. They change colors with what I wear and what I am feeling. I am 5' 4 1/2", weigh 185 at this time, am losing weight and would like to get down to 140 or so. I went up to 235 pounds when I was with my xbf, so I have lost 50 so far. (My guy thinks I look HOT now) I have gotten my hair cut short recently and I have been told by many people that I look like Sharon Stone (another Pisces) in CatWoman.

I am 59, and have also been told that I look 15 to 20 years younger than I am..a few have said that I even look younger than that. My xbf was 20 years younger than me and I have been asked out on dates by guys in their late 20's. They are far too young for me!

As I said, I was given my mother's name at birth. Well, except for my height and hair color, I looked like my mother when she was younger. My voice even sounded like hers. My mother tried at different times in my childhood to 'ugly' me up.

And my 'intelligence' came from both of them though I am not quite sure where my creativity or talents (not talking about my abilities or gifts here) came from because they were not talented or creative in the same ways that I am.

July 7, 2007
12:53 pm
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red blonde
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Right now, I look like very plain..no make up on, etc. and due to a lack of good sleep.

July 7, 2007
1:03 pm
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red blonde
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You will also have to understand that I have not thought myself 'hot' or 'sexy' or even 'beautiful' until my guy came back into my life. I guess I have downplayed that part of me for some reason - fear? And that I guess I have made men go through alot of trouble to get close to me. I was just thinking about that while walking on the beach yesterday...I realize now that I had been afraid of being raped again, so when I dated...I would not allow myself to be 'alone' with them for a long long time. Didn't let them pick me up for a date unless it was a couples thing and there were others around me at all times. Safety in numbers?

July 7, 2007
1:06 pm
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red,
Wow, you do have some awesome great gifts..you really do. I tend to agree with bevdee's statement that you may have had an NDE at birth that could have heightened your senses as well. Too, many times, abilities such as yours are given very carefullt to people who are humble enough to have them, use them for good, and sometimes they are even inherited abilities. Do you know of anyone else in your family history who had the same abilities?

Also, have you ever heard of 'INDIGO' Children? If not, look them up on the internet and see if you identify with any of the characteristics.

Also, in Biblical times and something I do not quite understand in Genesis, about the Seraphim are said to have been on earth and mated with humans, and some turned into the Naphailim, as was the giant Goliath, and giants of that time....which I am going over to start a thread of Coral City in Peru that you brought up earlier.....

So far I like both titles for your book.

July 7, 2007
1:38 pm
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red blonde
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OMW ~

Really, thank you for your kind words and thoughts. I don't know if I am that 'humble' even to have had these abilities. I have always tried to use them for good, but I can not say for sure that I have not used them for bad as well, especially when I had no 'control' over them and didn't understand them at times.

As for anyone else in my family history who had or has the same abilities. Some have exhibited abilities but nothing to the extent or range that I have. And I can also detect abilities in others, as with my best girl friend ten years ago, who is just been becoming aware of them in the last 2 or 3 years. I gave her one half of an amethyst crystal cluster that broke in two when she had visited me back in 2000, it was to create a 'bond' between us...because she moved thousands of miles away from me. (I know when she is down, she knows when I am down, etc.) At first, she pooh poohed it..but things happened since then that she cannot ignore any longer and now she is seeking knowledge and others in her area to help her learn more about it.

July 7, 2007
1:45 pm
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red blonde
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I will google Indigo Children...

As for what you do not understand in Genisis about the giants, etc. It would only be conjecture on my part at the moment.

Suppose that somewhere on Earth, they found the bones of giants, I wonder what science would make of that find...or would they swept it under the rug per se?

Sometimes I feel like I am an anomoly.

July 7, 2007
1:46 pm
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It's interesting to be sure. I have a heightened sense of awareness, I sese things that could happen if not dealt with, if I think of someone they call, as if it is a premonition that they are going to call, and I feel things about people, and have meaning ful dreams. I believe it is a God-given gift. All three of my sons are the same way and have incredible insight into people. But we are not as sensitive as you I don't believe. Many facets and possibilities to all of us! I think we are made of energy, and electrical impulses.

July 7, 2007
2:17 pm
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red blonde
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OMW ~

I haven't been able to 'hone' any of my abilities yet. Maybe, when I get through what I am going through at the present time, I will be able to do that. Perhaps, that is WHY I am going through all of this, excuse me, CRAP that I am going through, or over, right now. I do not understand WHY I have had to go through this crap. But I do realize that I have not gone through it 'alone' - 'Something else' has always walked with me, I believe, I just have never 'recognized' or knew it. At least, that is what I HOPE has been happening.

When the "SECRET" came out...you know what I am talking about ... right? Well, it was kind of scary to me...it has to do alot with WHAT my life has been in the past and now.

YOU CAN MANIFEST THINGS INTO YOUR LIFE. YOU CAN BRING THINGS INTO YOUR LIFE....GOOD AND BAD....and it is what is in your thoughts, what you think about...positive or negative.

Example: in 1992, I was diagnosed with a congenital cartilage disease. They told me that the cartilage between my joints was disintegrating, that there was no cure, that I would have to take painkillers or aspirin and tylenol (not at the same time) for the rest of my life. They also said that I would be in great pain and probably paralyzed within ten years. I started thinking about finding something that would help rebuild my cartilage. In or around 1996, glucosamine came about. I started taking it. I have no pain, no further diagnosis of cartilage disintegrating. This is what I am talking about 'COINCIDENCE'. WAS IT?

July 7, 2007
2:18 pm
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Red Blonde,

I don't have much time today, but I wanted to try to explain what I meant by cute and thin barrier.

No cheek pinching. It took me a year to do the hugs! Cute- like you got moxie! Like- I'm laughing.

The way I always understood thin barrier is that a person has a thin barrier between the "other" world. Other than our perception of reality.

I dream vividly, and can later recall my dreams in detail and in color. I have dreams that come true, that warn me of or foretell the future. I am a very easy person to hypnotise. I have a very strange kind of telepathic communication with my sister, even when we are not speaking to each other. I know when she is very upset or in trouble. When I don't focus on this sense, all I feel is the dread, and I have anxiety attacks. I hope that makes sense. It's as if I feel her emotion. I'm sorry if that seems inconclusive, I know it is, I need to think about a better way to explain this.

I can self-hypnose pretty easily, when I am not too stressed. Years ago, when I lived in AZ, I visited Sedona alot, and made some friends there. I was told that I had a strong gift, and should nurture it and hone it. I never did. I have never been able to shut off my awareness to spirits or ghosts in places! I see mists and vapors when no one else does. The house I live in sits on a lake, and sometimes, now, in the house I live in now, I hear muted talking (in the middle of winter with the windows closed). Several towns were purchased and submerged to make the lake. The old-timers around here told me about this, and they say that there have always been stories about ghosties all over this little peninsula in the lake.

OMW brings up an interesting point about inherent tendencies. My mother is so psychic. I know I inherited this from her. She only used hers for "evil." At least that's what it felt like, when she directed it at me. :O However, she told me that when she was a little girl, she got in trouble alot for her abilities. That she learned early not to say what was on her mind.

Your art sounds very interesting. I wish I could see it.

July 7, 2007
2:36 pm
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red blonde
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Bevdee ~

You just gave me the chills!

I wouldn't allow anyone to pinch my checks anyway!

I dream vividly and in color. Scientists have said that we DON'T dream in color...I beg to differ with them! Mine come true as well or warn me.
Ditto on the telepathy - except I do it with alot of people - trying to learn to be selective now - somewhat. My best GF lives in AZ now! I have been to Sedona! Just ignore the mists and vapors. I see them as well, but others look at me like 'what planet are you from?' and I feel them and sometimes hear them. My gf who negated her abilities who lives in AZ saw them all the time...and sometimes they enter her 'dreams' as snipets. Trying to get her not to be so afraid of them.

You may be right about my mother - being like yours. She may have seen it coming out in me and it made her fear me as well. Never thought about that.

WOW! You have no idea how happy this make me feel - ALL OF YOU - to be able to talk about this stuff! I have tried to talk about it with others but scared most of them - away.

My art....well I am developing a web domain site/gallery. Not published yet to the Web. Will give key words to all of you at some time after published. OKAY?

July 7, 2007
2:39 pm
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red blonde
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I am literally bouncing up and down in my desk chair....I am so happy, I don't feel so 'alone' or crazy! WOW!

July 7, 2007
2:44 pm
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Miss Red

Ok- here's one. My sister and I used to sit and practice reading each other's thoughts. She read my Tarot and I did stuff with pendulums. I was a novice at all this. Once I held out my palms to her, and she brought hers up and touched her fingertips to mine. We both felt a shock Current) in our fingertips. Her eyes met mine, but all she did was jerk her hands down. It kind of scared us. Later, I tried to get her to talk about it, but she wouldn't. She quit reading cards, and I kind of backed off everything then, too. Then I got real "cluttered". The abuser moved in with me.

Which gemstones do you like?

July 7, 2007
2:58 pm
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red blonde
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Bevdee, Rising, Ella, OMW

I have been so afraid to talk to people about some of this.

But - do all of you see what a dilema I am in? If I have manifested things into my life like glucosamine, even my first love again after 37 years...and ALOT of other things as well. And then this 'something else', that has -walked - or been -there - with me like God or Guardian Angels...what does that make 'ME'? Is this what I am - a 'paradox'? What will happen if I DO hone these abilities? And if I 'walk' with God, because there have been a few who have said that I am like a 'conduit'....THEN WHAT! This is what really scares me!

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