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stereo typing men
June 1, 2004
4:30 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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i just read the thread "why do men always women to help them" and i reaslised that alot of it was stereo typing all men as slightly selfish, being a man i nkow this isnt true, but yes some men can be insensitive and selfish, but not all

i feel that some women after bad times do stereo type men as being generally selfish and obnoxious filth, which maybe the ones they have found are, but not all, i jus thought id stick up for men is all : )

June 1, 2004
5:39 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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well to be honest id rather stick up for women, contradicting myself now but only some men are like that, most are nice, and its the same with women , i dont think we can group men as bad and women as good, or vice versa, theyre mixed groups, good and bad in both, that difference is what makes finding love a journey and a lesson, of finding bad then good, and learning the difference, without the bad good would have no meaning and without good we would have no bad to learn from, both parties have equal importance

June 1, 2004
9:27 pm
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I'm not a big one for stereotyping, and definitely do not dislike men by any means. At some point, however, generalizations do occur, such as "why do women fake orgasm" and responses are not necessarily descriptive of ALL women, but women who DO fake orgasm.

Similarly, the thread "why do women ned men to take care of them"- well, it's pretty clear in this day and age that not ALL women do. Responses would generally be about those who do in fact want a man to take care of them.

That kind of thing.

Men in general have qualities about them that women just don't have, and those qualities get my boat motor revvin'.

Selfish and obnoxious? Certainly not most.

free

June 2, 2004
4:10 am
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lewis
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Do women really stick up for women?

I usually hear alot of bithching about other women

June 2, 2004
5:37 am
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lovesickpuppie
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seems i misinterperated the thread then ! i think peer pressure has something to do with steroe typing, like if men generalise women as something then other men will do it too so they can be accepted into men society, i do think women are superior to men in most ways, but as men we know it deep down and just dont like to say it, if i could become a woman with a womans brian and mind then im all for it woohoo !!! ( and no not cos of any thing to do with sex, i actually think the women get the short straw when it comes to sex, bad luck grls )

June 2, 2004
10:35 am
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lewis
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sterotyping i thought was how we come to understand things, we group them together, give them a label, & then we feel that we can predict their behaviour?

Don't we do that with most things in life?

Animals

Insects

Men

Flowers

Perhaps we need to rethink How we think?

June 2, 2004
10:49 am
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lovesickpuppie
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i think society stinks !
everyone has to belong to a group, devided by money, nusic,lifestyles, appearance, why cant we let people be who they want to be, people feel pressured to buy things to look "good" so they fit into a certain group, why not make your own group exclusively for you, and if youre different guess what they do? put you down, take the mick, laugh at ya, i hate society and money, they are the biggest evils in this world we live in today

June 2, 2004
11:00 am
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gingerleigh
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Perhaps it is not society itself that is evil. Maybe it is the value we are each taught at a young age to internalize the general "opinions" of society and fret when we do not fit into our perfect societal moulds.

June 2, 2004
11:06 am
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lovesickpuppie
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humm, interesting point, in general im tired of being grouped, so now im gona break free : ) feel free to join me, dress how you like, do what you like ect.

this is our little society on here, and lets face it, its great, no-one is discriminated against and all have equal oppertunities and rights, if only society was like this forum, still, we can only dream.

June 2, 2004
11:57 am
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Cici
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It's an evolutionary imperative to group people into stereotypes. It was a survival mechanism for ancient man. You had to make an on-the-spot decision about when an animal or another human was a threat to you or not. That's why humans have the largest brains of any primate. We have them to deal with the complex nuiances of human social networking. Yet, as a race, we are social creatures. The human being as an individual, if left in the wilderness, will die. Eventually, if you live long enough, everyone's survival rate drops to zero. hahaha.

I digress. Although it is difficult to overcome that which has become evolutionarily engrained in our group psyche, an awareness of the tendency to generalize automatically leads to less generalization.

June 2, 2004
12:05 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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i agree with the early man oart, but im grouped for being a grunger ( you may know us as rockers moshers, metal heads ect, it basically means i like rock music and dress in dark colours with lots of heavy chains, )

and thing is, in my area there are also townies ( rappers ect, ppl who like rap music and hate us grungers) we are picked on and threatened, id never walk out alone at night round my way, just down the raod these people hang otu, if we go there we get picked on verbal abuse, thrown things at, ect, im tired of it, society is broken because of behaviour like this, im becoming my own person, not a grunger anymore, i cant be grouped by society im too unique, sure we should group evil and horrible people but not without giving them fair chances.worst thing is im sure some of the townies like rock music and some of us grungers but because they are seen as townies they think oh no i musnt talk to them grungers, it sucks, im taking a stand now, i dont care about groups, they mean nothing to me, also im feeling rather rebelious lately, like i wanna protest about something, does anybody know if homosexuals can serve in the military in the UK ?

June 3, 2004
3:17 am
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lewis
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if we take all out clothes off, we'd still group together, they would be the 'pop bellies' & the 'airy backs' and many more! Seems to be an innate need to group together.

However, the stuff that society does, there is no need to judge people on their looks and clothes. In nature, it would be a necessy need for survival. In society it is to judge and have power.

lovesickpuppie, society does stink, but we all have the power to change it.

June 3, 2004
6:02 am
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Wanttobewell
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I was with my husban's family over the weekend. My mother-in-law weighs about 6 lbs soaking wet, and she thinks everyone should look like a stick. My husband gained a bunch of weight after we were married and the way she acted and the snide remarks she made about him made me so damned mad. So now he's dropped almost 70 lbs., and she beamed when he walked into the room.

She made a remark in talking to other family members (she doesn't talk to me very much, which is fine with me) about this country going to hell because no one cared how they looked anymore. I thought about that for about 2 seconds before I could feel the blood about to squirt out of my eyeballs. Of all the shallow, idiotic remarks I've heard people make about why the country is going to hell in a hand-basket, that has to be one of the stupidest things I have ever heard in my entire life.

The way people dress and the way they look may tell you some things about their personality, maybe, but to completely judge someone on their weight, hair, or the type of clothes they wear is ridiculous. I talked to him about that remark last night, and he told me that it makes her feel proud of him for him to look good. Sad, very sad, I believe.

Not everyone can be a stick figure or even wants to be. Not everyone gets dressed to the nines to sit around the house. She actually told him he looked human again. I'm seriously beginning not to like that woman. I wish on her a glandular problem so that she would balloon up to about 450 lbs and not be able to do a thing about it.

Talk about stereotyping!!! If you're overweight and don't wear the finest clothing ALL OF THE TIME, then you all my friends care nothing about how you look and are responsible for this country going to hell!!! Now, how do ya like that one? Oops, here comes the blood out of my eyeballs and ears too this time!!! I'd like to just slap her tiny, skinny, constantly prissy looking-down-her-nose at everyone else, face.

June 3, 2004
7:44 am
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lovesickpuppie
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thats the kind of grouping or stereo typing i hate so much, i was over weight about a yr ago and ppl used to take the mick, jus `cos we look different,

i was in the car yesterday with my grandad, and there was a woman getting into a car and admittedly she was overweight but my grandad says "c`mon fat cow " to me, im like thats not nice, and he goes "well she is fat" to me it doesnt matter but to some selfish ppl for some reason they see ppl who look different as being wrong and not part of society, stupid.

June 3, 2004
7:56 am
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lewis
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ouch!

June 3, 2004
9:05 am
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Cici
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Idealistically, it would be wonderful if we could hold hands and sing "We are the World, We are the children" or whatever, but how many times has this taken place? What is evil? It's an arbitrary decision. My exhusband grew pot and is now in ederal prison. He spent some time in Atlanta in a 23 hour a day lockdown prison and he got one hour a day in a dog cage on cement out in the sunlight. Now, he was grouped by the justic system as being a "Criminal" - now he'll always be a felon, exconvict, whatever.

Not f*cking fair in the least, but what can you do. It is our choice to be arbitrarily exclusionary and cruel.

But that said, you can't tell me that if you were herded into a football field with a bunch of people you didn't know, you wouldn't pick a group to hang out with that you felt were more similar to you.

I live in a college town so there are SO many different groups of people. I refuse to identify myself with any of them, but you just end up being a loner. You can fight society all you want, but keep trying to fight the biological imperitive and see how far you get.

June 3, 2004
9:34 am
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lovesickpuppie
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mm good point about the footbal feild full of people, maybe its a natural way to find the best people to hang round with but i think its gone too far now, i accept we need grouping such as how to chose freinds but i think its got out of hand, grouping people because of how they look and then discriminating against them, i think the worst two cases of discrimination is against people of different race and/or colour to you and different sexuality to you, thats just wrong to discriminate against, and also religion, i think the strongest example is hitler and the jewish community in german at the time, that was terrible, just because of their religious beliefs, how i wish they had caught him alive.

June 3, 2004
12:11 pm
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sixfootblonde
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Why would someone get maximum security for only growing pot? Is that all he did? Because 23 hr a day lockdown is a maximum security prison. That doesn't make sense.

June 3, 2004
12:26 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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maybe thats the law generalizing all people who break the law as scum and in need of maxiamum security ( im not calling him scum by the way, but some criminals, such as killers are scum ) and yeh, why did he get max security? i agree with SFB

June 4, 2004
12:29 pm
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Cici
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You tell me. I was aware of the case details and went to the trial. In the federal prison system (which is different from the state prison system) - they can move you wherever they want to in the entire country - this includes military brigs. He's already been in a total of 5 different facilities since March. Atlanta was a brief stop.

He's in a brig on a military base now, that's where he'll serve the remainder of his sentence, and then he gets shipped to some federal bootcamp in california to reduce his sentence. So, there are the details for you.

I feel that as long as we segregate ourselves discrimination will continue. And having experienced racial discrimination (walking down the street with my mom being spit on because I'm mixed), discrimination because I have a seizure disorder at jobs and stuff. It comes from people you totally don't expect it to come from, and when you look in their eyes, it's like they don't see a person - they see a thing, to push away from them.

I mean, in the same way you say "townies this" or "townies that" - you perpetuate the idea that there is a difference. In my city "townies" are people who went to high school here and stayed either to go to UF or not to go to college at all. Yeah i think i pissed my roommate off because i said something about "why would you stay here if you didn't go to UF" and she totally dropped out of high school, so she was irritated.

Anyhoo - I have felt, sometimes, like people will always judge me. I hate it. It's been an issue my whole life, I am judged by my mixed race, by the different races of men I choose to date, by my lifestyle...I feel like it will always be like that.

June 4, 2004
5:51 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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mm i think it is so out of order to be racist, something someone said about coloured ppl being segregated on tis site to certain ares, and i know coloured ppl werent alowed on some busses or to some skools, that is so selfish, ive stopped judging ppl now, the way i look at it i dont need to judge ppl, there are ppl that get paid to do that in court rooms and im not one of them, i just hop society can do the same back to me. yes we do need to jude to a certain extent but not like we do, i think you could take a single person and they would be okish to colured ppl, homosxuals, ect but as soon as you returned them to society theyd be discriminating againts them again, person = good people = bad

anyways im of to bed now 🙂 night night everybody, or morning to some of you in the states

June 5, 2004
3:51 pm
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Wanttobewell
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Oh Twinks,, Apparently they are everywhere!!! These people can't all be lumped up together,,,otherwise, who would they criticize?

Some threads on the support site have drained what little bit of sense I was saving for a special occasion. No use in carrying on any further today,,all gone,,all gone..

I liked Tez's and Cici's discussion on the other thread. I did understand the bottom line of what Tez said about continuing on that blind path. Tez, that's exactly my life story. So hard to stop it but must. Probably not appropriate to comment on that on this thread, but I did it anyway. Out of the house wtih me now. W.

June 6, 2004
1:30 am
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Stereo typing, is it wrong? its a complex question. When the majority of dogs bite, then i wont be wrong saying "why do dogs bite?". see.. it depends on what portion of the population fits the "claim" or allegation. If its 5%, sure, i'll be wrong, but if its 70%, thats a big figure. Now what percentage of women are like that, I really dont know.. to me it sounds the majority, thats why I had asked. Anyway.. whatever. i had to ask and i got the answer that "if women are like that, men too are like something -they think its ok to care for the woman, so they're as much as to blame as woman are". ok im done, dont hammer on me, i've been alone fighting the topic myself. Did I gain? yes! As i said, I got the answer and my thinking did change.

June 6, 2004
4:18 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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humm, i respect your opinion but what you was saying about the dogs first, if it was a 70 % of dogs bite then yes it is a big number but its not all therefore youd be wrong to say all dogs bite,

and with the men caring fgor women thats a small thing called love, when ya love someone you care for them and theres nothing wrong with that.

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