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OMW
September 19, 2007
4:36 pm
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Hi!

It's good to see you posting again.

I don't take offense to what you said about the masons. I've actually been reading alot about it- there are many viewpoints.

I can tell you this, though- there's no "they tell you" when you "get to the top"

It's a different kind of thinking OMW- it doesn't follow any of the religions. I don't think it's Satanic though. I just never got that feeling.

But ya know, maybe I'm wrong.

Shaney posted about the Knights Templars and yeah- that's where they came from. Not everybody thinks the Knights Templars are/were good either though.

I've been reading about "skull and bones" - got fascinated with it last night and researched until the wee hours of the morning. And the conspiracy thing- this is interesting- it's really grabbed me.

I've been better OMW- facing some real challenges as of late- physical and emotional.

How have you been?

free

September 20, 2007
8:33 pm
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Hi free,
You are right there is no 'they tell you' when they get to the top. It is secretive. The shriners do good deeds, they help people they always have. But the higher echalon is not the same as the lower echalon, and the lower echalon, does not know what the higher echalon beleves in or practices. The Free Masons are considered to be the Illuminati. There is so much information, so much symbolism, so much influence, so much Masonic influence and symbolism in our gov't...has been for hundreds of years, and some of their symbols are demons, and satanic in nature. You just have to wonder why one group of people have become so powerful over the years, and want an new world order. You have to wonder why our Pentagon forms a MAsonic symbol, and for what? It is all very strange.

I guess the Knights of Templar were kicked out of France and went to Scotland, and there they formed the Masons, the Illuminati, the owl symbol, it is all in Skull & Bones, and our Presidents attend skull & bones once a year in CA, and they dress up in black hooded robes, and their beleif system is quite unlike anything we are used to having our politicians be members of. Johnson was a member of the Free Masons, but he left. Kennedy knew the truth about the Free MAsons and it is why it is thought that he was killed, as he had plans to reveal the truth to the public. Eisenhower knew the truth and warned the American people in his final speech to the nation about the Illuminati...who apparently run the Free Masons. The Illuninati are bankers from Europe. They control everything. YOu may not want to know these things but if you ever have the chance, do some research, and let me know what you think.

But on another note, what's going on? HAve you been ill? Emotional can cause the physical maladies. I hope you are feeling better. Talk about it if you want to here.

I am doing ok, trying to stay healthy. I have family worries, but overall, doing ok. Getting reading to start a home-based business, a multi-level marketing ..ground -floor opportunity, so will see how it goes. I'm excited. Maybe if it goes well, I can retire early!!

But write me back and let me know what is going on that you are feeling so poorly, ok?

Take care,
omw

September 20, 2007
8:37 pm
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It is difficult to put everything here in writing in its proper perspective. I re-read it and it is scrambled at best. But if you have the time, look at some You Tube videos of Free Masons and plug in the Illuminati. I know you have some background experience, I beleive you shared awhile ago, in regard to Free Masonry. I would be interested to know what you think of these.

Take care.

September 20, 2007
11:04 pm
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Hi OMW

I'm actually quite interested in all of this "negative" talk about the freemasons. Remember OMW, a person can join the masons if he just knows somebody in it. Nobody is excluded- there needs to be a belief in a higher power, is all.

It's very gnostic in nature OMW, and throughout history gnostics have been known as heretics, lunatics, satan worshipers, pagans, etc.

I've noticed the following. If one enters a group of people, such as here, and speaks of the "evil" of masonry, he/she is welcomed, accepted.

If a person, however, attempts to speak highly of masonry, he/she is cast out, harshly if he/she attempts to defend. Not just here- at this site, I've noticed this with many people, on both ends, in many places.

It appears- people in the most part are not interested in learning about masonry- they are interested in tearing it apart. If they're interested in masonry, they join it.

Yes, high up masons (and lower ranking masons) have political power as they are in the political place. many of them get voted there. One doesn't get voted into high ranking political offices by being joe blow surfer bum turned I'm gonna be a politician. of course that's just stating the obvious.

i could go on and on, it's a big topic.

But in closing for now I'll tell ya this- masons are quite influential in all free countries. Numbers are growing at an astounding rate in the middle east.

Masons were formed when people attempted to flee religous persecution, and that's where they gain their strength in numbers. Masons are about the human desire to be free, independent, thinkers.

I would imagine there may be corruption, and that needs to be investigated.

The symbols are a language.

Secrecy, especially at the upper levels, is imperative. There's no such thing as "free and united" in public- peoples dark side cannot stand for anything united. those seeking power will need to destroy it.

Satan is not feared OMW- in the Christian story satan was the first, original free thinker. he's not worshipped either- nothing is.

I'm aware of the masonic implications in both Lincoln's and Kennedy's assassinations.

I'll check out the things on u-toob that you mentioned.

I've a feeling my response is going to be "wow." lol

Illuminati.....

hmmmm.....

well.

maybe another day.

free

September 20, 2007
11:21 pm
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Hi OMW

I read your post to me on the other thread- I left that thread for a number of reasons.

I'll look at those videos you suggested and give you my thoughts but after that I'm think I'm gonna stop posting about my own experiences and knowledge with this. Reading what others say on the subject- I think that's gonna suit me better than sharing.

As far as "if I knew what survivor knew" well, not sure what to say on that one.

take care

free

September 20, 2007
11:42 pm
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and OMW- in case I weirded ya out-

I love Jesus, worship Him, and can't wait to meet Him.

free

September 21, 2007
1:40 am
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Hi again!

How funny- I look over this thread and tonight it's like all I've been doing- posting here over and over.

I've been reading about this like non-stop- I'm so grabbed.

Forming a theory along the lines that there's good masons and bad ones- originally I do believe they were all good, but could be wrong there too.

anyhow,

I looked at the videos you suggested - and about an hour's worth of more of them, and I gotta admit- I was just NOT aware of all this satan and conspiracy stuff. There's a video I found especially disturbing- about the parallels of the masonic symbolism and other symbols I don't recognize, with satan stuff.

One of the videos shows satan symbolism and pictures of Christ in the same video.

Why? Do you know?

I've many questions.

On the personal front, OMW, I'm so deeply bothered by the fact that I just can't get away from my ex husband. He is relentless. There just doesn't seem to be any peace to be had and it's taking a toll on me at very deep levels- emotionally, physically, spiritually.

Sometimes I wonder if I've created my own hell and I'm not sure why. But I'm discovering that there is no escape. I don't know if I'm struggling with depression or what.

I feel so distant from people- I always have kuz I'm weird- connecting with others has always been such a challenge for me- always been the "odd duck out" - shoot, my favorite number is pi, I talk to ghosts, think math is fun and teenagers are delightful unless they're my own. That's just a chip of it all.

Not stating that to elicit pity- it's non-connectedness is just a feeling I have and it disturbs me.

I had to leave the other thread- I'm quite interested in all that's being said, but I don't seem to know how to post an opposing thought without it being percieved as an attack, and half the time I find I don't understand what somebody is saying to me.

What I did hear loud and clear was "this poster" probably thinks....and "this poster that" as if I don't have a name. My ex husband does this- he calls me "the petitioner" kuz that's what I'm referred to in legal documents. He's the respondent, but I call him by his name. I'm the only one on that thread that posted an opposing thought and gave a "toughen up" line- and that was well-

there's a line that stated the vicious fangs were out and some other things and it just, I don't know-got me thinking- maybe I'm a bad person after all.

Can't get away from my ex, can't be the mom I used to be, can't be the teacher I used to be, the advocate I used to be, the athlete I used to be, on and on,

kuz I'm "bad". Born that way. Maybe I AM "the petitioner", "this poster", the predator, the hawk, the wolf, the one with vicious fangs,yadida?

sometimes people say "free you are so strong you have it so together" not just here, but in my daily life and I've always disagreed. I'm right OMW. I never had it all together and strong is not an adjective that applies to me. I've always been holding on by a thread, and I've just- lost the thread.

I dunno OMW, I'm dying inside.

Have been for a long time, and I think I'm getting to the end, whatever that might be.

well that was a major vent.

talk to ya soon- I gotta get some sleep tonight.

free

September 21, 2007
5:54 am
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Free:

I'm sorry to interrupt, but reading your post I remember those days. They are hard days. And the ex not letting up. May I ask what is goin on w/ that? You know my evil-x was a jerk up to this day. I finally got to the point that I just said, "you have no reason to talk to me" and I'd hang up. Do you and he have children that you must discuss and him see for visitation? There are many things that can be done. If you don't mind opening up to me about it I would be glad to help.

On the mason front... I purposely stay off religious threads. But, it is my understanding that they are satanic, but not until up at the very top of the ladder. Most masons have no clue about what goes on up in the higher ranks. Some higher rank folks may not be privy to knowing if they are thought to be a threat. I know several masons and they are the most wonderful, caring folks. That's where it is sad the deception to them and to us. My husband knows more regarding masons coz he studied them. He has one of their "forbidden" books also. I am not normally superstitious, but I told him IF he's keeping that book then it will be in a box out in the shed. I don't want satan to have any hold in my family. Anyway, maybe I'll mosey on over and read that thread this afternoon.

Well I have 2 hours sleep before I must get up. My youngest has been running 102 to 104.5 fever and chillin since yesterday, then this evening she starts the throwin up. I've been up w/ her most the night. I'd just stay up but I do have a doc appt in the am.

Hope to talk later.

OMW: So very good to see you here. Been wondering about you.

September 21, 2007
3:35 pm
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Oh free, bless your sweet heart.

I will be honest with you. To me, your screen name here says what you are: 'free'. More than anyone on the Libs side, you are non-judgemental, open, open to other's thoughts without condemnation, open-minded, easy to converse with, and a heart the size of Texas.

I don't know exactly what your situation is with your ex. How long have you been divorced? Sounds like he may be angry and tries to make your life as miserable as he may know how too.

Regarding being a mom, you have to allow yourself to change. Kids change, that is a given, but allowing ourselves to change is important too. When they are little, it is so much more rewarding and easier...or so it seems anyway. When they are older, they don't need us (at least they do not think so, we just have to be 'super-parents' and remain consistent in our love, sometimes tough love)and they do not even like us. We are not as effective. So then we look around and think, I must be a lousy mom, or feel guilty for something we did. I have been there mentally and emotionally so many times. My oldest is so emotionally damaged from my marriage/divorce. So here you are, in a different year, a different place mentally and emoitonally yourself...you are changing, your wants and needs and tolerance level is changing and is different than it was before...you have to allow that for yourself. We are not the same people we were years ago. So you are probably a good mom in THIS time, and you were a good mom BEFORE. The kids just grow up and we are their enemy, then they come back. How old are your children? Plus we need support. I don't know about you, but I used to be a confronter, and a fighter. I am none of those anymore, I just want peace in my life...normal peace, and if anything disrupts it...I do not have the power within me to confront. If a tank were to point a gun at me at this time in my life, and I had no way to fight, I would lay down and die. Even on these threads, as many times as I have been shot down for my belief system...for 2 years, I just don't go there anymore...I don't care. People believe what they want too, and the world will take us where we are supposed to go. I am done with the belief system arguments here on these threads. So if you eve want to talk to me about your beliefs, post a thread to me as you have done here.

Mamacinnamon and I have had conversations back and forth over the years, as we believe the same. She said she does not get into the religion threads any longer...she learned quicker than I did. So I stay off, and it is ok, and I stay off for the same reasons as you posted above and for the same reasons as MamaC. She helped me through so much'stuff' of mine when I first came to AAC.

HI MAMACINNAMON...been wondering about you too, and good to see you post. 🙂

free, you are stressed and overwhelmed...when I get that way it is because I cannot change my world fast enough and things are happening that I have no control over...or are beyond my control, and I can't stand for my world to be that way. One by one, who I am..a mom, a teacher, an employee, a friend, etc...begins to spiral downward. The only way I get out of it is to embrace it. I thank God for it. And I know that my feelings are getting the better of me, moreso than what I KNOW to be true.

Your ex...what is his problem? What is he doing? Is it worth getting a restraining order, or is he feeding off of your doubts about yourself right now and coming back at you with them?

free, hang in there. Don't give up. I know it hurts. I am so sorry you are hurting.

_____________________________________

Regarding the Masons,
Appreciate you sharing what you know.

This caught my eye:

"Satan is not feared OMW- in the Christian story satan was the first, original free thinker. he's not worshipped either- nothing is."

A free thinker worships nothing but perhaps themselves? All very interesting, I have learned something new, and will reply to Masons later, but first thought it more important to write you back about what you are going through.

hugs to you,
omw

September 21, 2007
11:49 pm
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mamma, OMW

thanks. from the bottom of my heart.

It's such a long story I don't even know how to shorten it.

I've a 10 year criminal restraining order- yeah it was pretty bad. Quite a few years left on that.

But he can file anything he wants to in the civil courts, and he does.

the details I gotta be vague with- you know that.

I'm gonna have to think about how to tell you about it and not give away anonymity. I don't worry about him "knowing" i'm here, as I'm sure he probably does, but I don't want "evidence" to be brought forth in the terms of anything I write here. ya know?

Gotta be a little paranoid. he's a stalker, and he's good. Always under the radar, never making the same mistake twice, obsessed, narcissistic.

and we have kids together, teen and pre-teen.

so. there's visitation.

that ties us together.

on the masonic thing- OMW- been doing some reflection on it, and of course reading. Gonna stay off the religous threads.

How come pictures of Jesus are shown with satanic pictures and emblems? I'm bothered by this and don't like it.

free

September 21, 2007
11:56 pm
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free

May I barge in here and ask a question? Remember I don't believe in god and satan, but I have some thoughts about the reason it is called "satanic"

I come in peace. :O

September 23, 2007
1:40 am
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Hi mamma~ I'm tired of fighting my ex. I'm beyond tired. I want all that happened to be in the past. But, every year, and I do mean every year he files something- usually more visitation and lowered child support. A year and a half ago, the kids and I were successful in getting an order that says visitation is discretionary. I still made the kids go see him sometimes- he took advantage of that, hiding one child for a few weeks, denying contact, and there was nothing law enforcement could do because of the order. I did file a motion to get my child back and that was successful. I still encouraged the kids to see him, but he has a serious drinking problem- to the point he's now told the kids he has cirrhosis of the liver and he took a voluntary layoff from work, so he's not working. He wanted to move out of state but he can't kuz of his probation. I think he might be dying. I don't know. Anyow, visitation was ugly- he had anger rages and drunk rages, and now one child is NOT interested in visitation. I don't think he cares about the kids- Christmas came and birthdays came- over a year and a half- unacknowledged by him. No presents, no cards, nothing. He would call periodically- the kids have cell phones.

Well, over the last year and half I've had them roughly 99 percent of the time, but I never filed for more child support. No rock that boat I say. Well he filed for a reduction and found out that child support services uses only actual visitation, and he wanted them to use the old order, like 28 percent, when visitation was court ordered. So now, he has filed for forced visitation and delayed the support heraring. his declaration is of course filled with untruths.

What is exhausting to me mamma, is that I have all records- phone bills, education records, etc- and can prove that virtually everything he stated in his declaration is false. It's always that way mamma. But he still gets his day in court and nobody ever issues consequences for this perjury so it continues. I have to provide records, reciepts, old bills, statements, and of course money for an attorney, time off work, gotta go to mediation, etc. Every fucking year.

We have a new judge now- every time we get a new judge he re-files everything. and we'll have another one as soon as the governator appoints one, so we'll be going through this yet AGAIN. And it's not like it's go to court and it's all over. it's months. this one has been going on since June. Still haven't had the hearing.

I worry. about the youngest child- I don't want him forced over there- his dad can be so mean. In a way I want his dad involved in his life, but I dread the drama and crisis and shit that his dad pulls. The kids are pawns in a nasty game that never ceases to end.

And I'm tired. Every time he files something he brings up his trial (he swears he's innocent and I framed him) so we go through that crap again.

years mamma. 10 years doing this now.

I'm starting to blame myself again and we know what that pit is like. I just feel myself sliding into it, questioning my role in all of it, my decisions, my part. am I bad, am I evil, am I screwed up, a parental alienator, am I hurting my kids, etc etc.

Physically- I want to drink. Get the numbe. Escape.

My immune system is suffereing- I get colds and bronchitis and I smoke. Try quitting and that's successful until i feel stressed, which is daily now.

I have neuromas- morton's neuroma that flares up in my feet, and tendonitis in one so bad that sometimes I can't walk. At night sometimes I wake up from a nightmare or gotta go pee and my feet are all tensed an dcurled- I'm doing this shit in my sleep- tensing. Grinding teeth so now I have a nightguard kuz the grinding weakens them to the point they break, but I lost my gurad and it's a few hundred bucks. i get insomnia so I'll clean- got to painting this summer, and puting molding up and caulking. Sounds great- physical activity is supposed to help, until one day I woke up and my shoulder was literally frozen- I could not move my arm and my shoulder. Excruciating pain. Well the shoulder goes into paralysis when in that much pain. X ray shows calcific tendonitis- injected it with cortisone and that helped alot, but I can't even start the lawnmower. Doc says he'll inject it again one time and then we'll have to look at surgery.

doc says stop worrying so much.

No prob doc.

lol.

free

September 23, 2007
2:36 am
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OMW

You expressed concern that the masons don't fear lucifer- he's the first and original free thinker, that they worsip themselves maybe.

personally I think anything representative of darkeness and misery is very frightening and satan scares the crap out of me. A friend of mine laughs at this(she's not a mason) kuz she says satan is a coward and a bully.

well, I think bullies are best stayed away from.

Anyhow, it's the thinking away from controlled dominance that masons attempt,and lucifer did that. I'm not saying that what lucifer did was good, just saying he did that. That thinking led to the revolutionary war, which turned out I think, to be good. I'm not definding lucifer OMW, and I'm not luciferian- Satan is bad and evil, hurtful, devastating. It's the free thinking part- free will, free choice, and, knowledge. Masons are big on education and knowledge, but this DID lead to the downfall of man. God wanted to protect us from knowledge. We got more than we bargained for when eve rebelled. Obviously. Knowledge and freedom gave us choice- we can choose to be evil or choose to be good.

When Masons were forming, they found that a belief in God is what people had in common, it was a unifying thing, a common ground, something to bind people together, versus wage war with one another, thus the requirement. At the time wars were about God and the power of the Church. That unification led to freedom from oppression by the Catholic church and England. Obviously not at the same time.

KKKers were terrorists, simply put, and still are.

The "New World Order" isn't supposed to be the evil satanic rule of revelations. It's supposed to be freedom from oppression and religious persecution- worldwide.

masonic symbols are prevalent in America kuz the constitution and legal system was set up with major masonic influence- it's the masonic view.

the viewpoint is that somebody's gonna rule the masses of the people- there are gonna be leaders - somebody is gonna be a governing power- let that power be one that ensures no persecution based on religion, sex, race. As the world gets smaller due to internet, travel, etc, it will need to be a global thing as we are all connected and depend upon one another. Isolationism doesn't work.

Jesus was a rebel, too, OMW, he spoke against the laws of the land. And was crucified for it. He's my hero.

In America, you can say you're God if you want to. Can't even be arrested for that. Can't say that in an oppressed country, which comprises most of our globe.

In light of what I've been reading, masonic views were maybe a good attempt at freedom for all people, and global peace.

People- too many of them- they're just too well, evil.

The seeing eye- it's not lucifer watching you- it's whatever God you worship- she/he's watching you, so behave.

The rising sun- represents the pagan sun god- knowledge, light, wisdom, education. Enlightenment.

The handshake is a "brotherhood/sisterhood" thing- like the fishy people used to tell others they were Christian and that they were safe.

Roman numerals used in pyramids refer to chapters and verses in the book of Romans- the book of Romans is masonic language. Remember, while they wanted freedom of religious persecution, the influence at the time of their formation was Catholic.

I'll talk about masons all day long. Nobody's gonna kill me. If they do hunt me down, well then I guess I'll understand in my final moments what all this conspiracy stuff is.

I'm beginning to see how others view masonic beliefs as satanic.

I just so hope it's not. yuck. When I think of "satanic" I think evil, hurtful, greed, darkness, lust, envy- the deadly sins, pain, grief, sadness, suffering, and misery. all the bad things we know of.

I prefer unity in faith, love, hope, and charity.

Most certainly, lucifer is the king of lies and deciet. i just hope he's not king of the masons.

free

September 23, 2007
3:10 am
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http://altreligion.about.com/l.....00102a.htm

This article explains well the use of the pentagram.

OMW, the Pentagon is a symbol of Christ- it represents the star of bethlehem and the 5 wounds of Christ.

Satanists stole the symbol- masons had it first.

And while people don't like to admit it- founding masonic fathers were Christian masons- not all of them were public about their masonry due to fears of persecution. Membership can be secret if so chosen.

ayhow. I sore to myself I was gonna stay off the religious thread thing.

I like your insight OMW. I've no desire to be misled, especially by satan.

so please, if you feel I'm arguing with you, don't think I'm arguing with you in a negative way. If I'm wrong and misled, I want to be shown that I'm wrong and misled.

that's what free thinking is about.

is all.

free

September 23, 2007
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Free:

I read your post. I must apologize coz I cannot answer it till tomorrow am. We had to take our youngest into hospital 5am and I've been up w/ her last 2 nights. She's so very ill. It's just a nasty virus but fever has now hit as high as 104.9 and has stayed over 102 for 3 days. Then there's the chills, vomiting, etc.

I read every word and I know your pain. I do want to discuss it w/ you. (((hgs)))) been there on all those counts.

OMW: good to see you.

September 23, 2007
1:26 pm
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Hi mama~

this went on with one of mine years ago. She had been complaining of her back hurting and then the fever, chills and vomiting came. Icouldn't keep the fever away- she would only come down around 100-101 in a tepid tub.

It was a kidney infection and they hospitalized her. She was fine later, but it could have been much worse had it not been caught.

make sure they've done a urine sample at the hospital to rule this out. Often when a fever refuses to break, it's a a kidney infection. We discovered this kuz I told the doctor I'm concerned she had a bladder infection that went into her kidneys- happened to my mother once. then they did the urine sample- kidney infection.

Just something to check out if you can't keep that fever broke.

Hope your little one feels better.

free

September 24, 2007
11:41 am
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Free:

Again tried to write yesterday and found my head on the desk and zzzzzzzzzzz or ddddddd or whatever thru the document so I quit. Today first thing I wrote. Sorry it looks like a book. Didn't realize it would be so long, but I couldn't find anything I wanted to cut so here it is as follows:

Free:

Sorry I am late. Long day w/ sick kid.

Look at your name... FREE. FREE is a strong name; one that is of a warrior. Why did you pick this name?

Here are a few meanings from the Merriam Weber Dictionary. read them..
...enjoying personal freedom : not subject to the control or domination of another
...not determined by anything beyond its own nature or being
...choosing or capable of choosing for itself
...not bound, confined, or detained by force

You picked your name for a reason and whether you believe me or not you will persevere. You are strong even tho you feel weak.

I went thru the same things. Him putting my son in military school 3 hours away w/ instructions not to let me see him. I had full custody yet they let him do this because he said he was his father. Took me weeks to find him since the evil-x wouldn't tell me where he was. The military school got their eyes opened when we finally found him. And the x had put him in there and not even signed for medical attention. He didn't care, he was only mad at my son.

I had to take the sheriff to get my kids coz he'd not let me have them and when the sheriff showed up he'd say I hadn't there. Thank God I had full custody or he'd have gotten to keep the kids. He gave my son beer at 8 yrs old; had his house shot up w/ my kids in it; changed visitation; didn't show; threatened to take them at every turn. nd Free this went on for went on for 10 years.

Yes, I had many many moments of wishing I could just go to sleep and not wake up, but I was determined that my kids would have as normal lives as our circumstances permitted.

You are doing a great job Free. Honestly you are. You are persevering under the hardest of circumstances. Yes, you have to get the papers together every year. You should be good at it after 10 years. Keep them each year in a special box. I have my in a 10 gal plastic tote by date. Each year separated by an open legal file folder w/ the year written on it. Same for my medical records. Or when you file your taxes keep them in those storage boxes per year.

I know the pain in the heinie you are speaking of but hon if it has been 10 years now you are on the downhill slide. As for forced visitation, fight it. Stop doing the nice thing and go specifically by the court orders. Stick him to exactly the position he has put you in. Next time he calls announce to him something like this... "This is formal notice that I will speak to you regarding the children, and the children only. IF you get nasty w/ me the phone call will be over. I will say "goodbye" and I will then hang up. If you persist this behavior you will have to speak directly to my attorney at your expense." Yes this will make him madder than a hornet but DO IT. You'd be surprised at the outcome. When I first started this w/ my evil-x it went over very bad. He then called and called and called. I did exactly what I said. I stated what he was doing and said goodbye and hung up. Example: You are speaking to me in a hostile voice, goodbye. You are not speaking of the children any longer, goodbye. Then hang up.

Yes, court takes months. What is it that is upsetting you here? Are they asking for interrogatories and such? Use the last years as much as possible. Do you send him copies of the kids' school grade cards? If not, you might consider it. That way even tho not ordered you are putting forth a foot of faith and including him even tho not required to. Give him a list of ballgame dates? NO. He'd just show up to upset you.

About him not sending presents, etc... I hope you are not trying to make that up to the kids. It is a hard knock the will have to deal w/. I tried to make things right for my kids at first and it only drove me to almost broke. My evil-x would take them to the mall and hand them $300 and say "go shopping". I handmade their presents. Anything said I answered that I did it w/ my hands coz I love them. Didn't say more just that was it. I don't think I ever had to say that more than once. Kids are very perceptive and honestly they know what is goin on, and yes, they will play you two against each other. If they got into trouble and he said they are grounded I upheld it. If I told him I grounded them he let them have a party w/ all their friends. Nothing can be done about that type behavior other than if the kids don't hear you badmouth him then it will be a plus on your side.

I know most of what I printed above you probably know, but it doesn't hurt to see it again. Maybe you will find something new you can use.

As for the stress. Yes, stop it. (lol). I had to say it. When my docs tell me that I ask if they have a padded room or a condo on the ocean for me. They usually laugh. There are good stress reducers you can do. Relaxation technique 3 times a day. For the immune system hit a regiment of vitamin c or a multi vitamin stress relief formula. They will take the edge off hopefully. The thoughts that won't stop... Try thanking God for everything you see or do, specially if it is a messup. Sounds silly but it does work.

Ok, now that I have written a book, I apologize for the length. You are doin fine. You hang in there. How long till your youngest is 18? You are on the downhill slide. Actually you are a pro by now so just do what you know to do.

If you want to talk I'm always here for you. Any questions; any time. You know the advice you give her I get a lot of use from. I may not be going thru it anymore, but you are a true asset here. Keep up the good work, and take your own advice. It's good, stable advise.

mamaC

September 24, 2007
5:30 pm
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Hi mamma~

That was a wonderful post.

My ex and I don't talk on the phone- he'll go to jail if he attempts any contact with me. That, trust me, is a good thing.

I got the kids cell phones so he can arrange the whole visitation thing if he wants it- visitation is at the kids discretion.

I'm not sure why things are dragging out this time- they always seem to. In a way that's good kuz when court is coming up he always treats the kids really good- and they need that sometimes. I worry about the youngest. He hasn't seen his dad since last Christmas vacation and that was only for about an hour and was not nice. He's adamantly opposed to talking to or seeing his dad.

Dad says I alienate the kids from their father and so he wants the judge to order visitation. There's a good chance the judge might.

I'm totally torn with how I feel about this- boys need a man in their life and my own husband sucks at being a stepdad. I can't teach my son how to be a man. My ex husband is gonna teach him how to be an abusive man. likely. On the flip side, my ex husband at one time was very active with my son during visitation and that has its ups and downs too.

See, mamma, I just worry too much- i just worry constantly. I so want my kids to be successful in life, I guess we all do. I think i do to the extent that much of my self worth I place here- with my kids.

Mamma- thanks for your post. Ya know- I've never felt strong, I always wanted to be strong- it was a goal, but I've never felt that way.

free

September 24, 2007
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Hi free,
I am glad that you wrote, and I will get back to you soon.

Something I do not understand...how does he get away with this, and how is it that he seems to be able to get the judge, etc to do what he wants. This confuses me.

hugs,
omw

September 24, 2007
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Hi OMW-

I wrote a book- please don't feel obligated to respond- I think alot of what I really needed to do was to vent. I used to vent with my best friend but she got married in August (I married her and her husband in my backyard by my pond waterfall it was so cool)- and I miss her.

What he gets away with is lying. He's able to file these petitions and even though I show that his claims are false, nobody cares that he lied. So, what does he have to lose? Nothing. He can file all the civil motions he wants. Stalking through the courts is legal- sites like father's rights groups actually discuss how to do this- it's crazy OMW.I've never even been granted attorney's fees even after I showed he lied. I've been doing this for so long- I really do believe the legal system is a huge corporation and it feeds off the conflicts of people.

What he DOES get is the opportunity to have his case reviewed by a judge and maybe get what he wants. he doesn't get what he wants everytime- as a matter of fact, he rarely has. But he files and files- that's his right. Legally.

Anyhow. I'm all caught up in this conspiracy stuff now- what a challenge to my mind- I'm so glad this got brought up- I really needed something like that to "take me away." Versus drinking.That's definitely a good thing.

Thanks for responding OMW- it's truly appreciated.

free

September 25, 2007
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The system is supposed to work, but what the judges have now is 15 minutes and two files. He looks at them quickly and then the attorneys present their cases and he has to make his best call. Does he get away w/ lieing? yes, my evil x did also.

As for he gets to file and file. I am under the impression you can only file a certain amount of times w/n a time frame because it holds the courts up for those who do need it. Free slip me your state again or check out your statutes. I do believe that unless there is a change in circumstances he cannot just file for a reduction in child support, as you cannot file an increase unless there is a substantial change in circumstances. That is how it is here in MO. LA? legal attorneys. hmmm. Think I remember a few sites that might help out w/ lookin up this info. Will see what I can come up w/ Right? Anyway, i'm sorry the system sucks. It just does.

September 25, 2007
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Hi mamma-

The "change in circumstances" aren't real- he claims these and they're just bull. But there's nobody there to say 'hey you can't file this" see what I mean? he can file for a change in circumstances regarding child support any time there is a "change" and then he can file a "change in circumstances" regarding visitation once a year. he can take me to mediation any time he wants to. He's also filed contempt charges against me, an order to make me file forms for taxes (even though I'd already done that)- still had to take the day off and go to court to show it had been taken care of.

and then things drag out. He filed for lowered support this year in May, was supposed to be herd in July, but he wants a large visitation percentage used in the support calculations and was told no, so he filed for increased visitation over in the next city (support is in one city and visitation in the next)- got the suport hhearing postponed until the visitation hearing could be held, then moved the support hearing over to the next city, then combined the two motions into one and we were supposed to go to court today but- it's just setting now kuz last time the court appointed an attorney for the kids.

I'm telling ya- it's stalking through the courts and it's perfectly legal. Insane. Legal. bankrupting. A huge corporation.

free

September 25, 2007
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free, mamac,

I would think that common sense would tell the courts to say to him, "Hey fella, if you can file this many times and go to court this many times, then you can PAY!"

free so sorry you are going through this bs. I wish I had some golden words of wisdom to impart. This was always the part of the divorces that I could not understand. Personally I do not see how divorce attorneys maintain their own sanity. I would think that you could consider this harrassment from him, and a criminal restraining order, should never allow him to gain custody. You can continue to ask for any attorney's fees incurred from him. He sounds like he is on a vendetta. The children I believe can also through you, request a hearing with the judge in his private chambers, through your attorney preferably initially, if they decided on their own that they do not want to see their dad. It is a shame, but he sounds more of a detriment to their lives than a positive role model. Especially since he keeps coming after you...it is wearing you down, and this is legally not right, or healthy for you or your children. I would not feel guilt, if you do, for having him once and for all, to be kept away from your children. YOu have to seek what is best and seek peace AT ALL COSTS. I know you may be tired of fighting this, but surely something can cut this man off entirely. Again, if he has money to file all of the time and pay his attorney, then he has money to pay child support. If you have the chance to speak to the judge, tell him/her how all of this is effecting you and the kids, and ask, will this ever end?

Glad you are venting, and glad it is helping. I have done some paralegal work for divorce attorneys in the past, and all state statutes are different, but in regard to children it plainly states, "...in the BEST interest of the child..." what is BEST for them. Sometimes it is not someone like your ex.

Hang in there.
omw

September 25, 2007
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I can see how he gets away w/ it. If there wasn't a new judge every year he would not get away w/ it. But if they rotate the judge out yearsly then I can see it. And this thing of visitation in one city and child support on another... Are they in the same county? Each county has a county seat and that is where all paperwork should be filed. Explain to me how he does this please.

You are strong free. You have your kids to watch over. I know this is hard. but it will soon be done. Did you read in my last post? You don't have to talk to him.

Do you have an attorney? If so, use him. You are paying him for all this. Tell him to stop the nonsense. He can make things happen for you.

Keep hangin in.

September 25, 2007
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Hi mamma

All paperwork is not filed at a "county seat"

there are many cities within my- this one county that I'm in. the original divorce was filed in the city next door, so that city retains jurisdiction over the divorce which entails custody and visitation. Family law is not handled in my city- it's too small- one has to go next door.

When I enlisted the help of child support services, they filed their motion to enforce child support in the city I'm in, so this city retains jurisdiction over child support. however, my attorney knows the child support attorney and asked if we could combine the cases and have them both heard in the city next door. It was agreed (child support services did not have to relinquish jurusdiction) and both attorneys will be at that hearing.

usually, I'm in my own city for child support hearings, in the one next door for custody/visitation issues as well as divorce issues and civil restraining orders.

The criminal restraining order has nothing to do with custody and visitation and won't be considered because the restraining order keeps him away from ME, not the kids, and the crimes were committed against ME, not the kids. To me this is just another form of insane thinking. It didn't used to be this way- the so called father's rights movement has all but completely eliminated VAWA-violence against women's act.

there is nothing my attorney can do about this - these civil motions are his right. He has the right to file them. All she can do, and she is, is attempt to get attorney's fees as this would be a huge deterrent for my ex- he worships money.

But my ex is doing nothing "criminal" and nothing I can civilly sue for either.

In one year, he filed reduction of child support, increase of visitation, contempt, motion to force me to sign papers. Each motion takes 2-4 months to deal with. We're talking over a fucking year of motions at which time guess what? A year's gone by since the first motion got filed so he can fucking file again!

this is how it has been, mamma, for 10 years. There was a lull one year when I think there were only two motions on the books, kuz he ran out of oney. WEll, guess what- he found and married a cash cow. So here we go again.

It's stalking through the courts. Legal. If I want things to be different, I'm told, then the laws need to be changed- all judges can do is enforce the law, all attorneys can do is try to prove that their client is abiding by the law. All a prosecutor can do is hold one responsible for breaking the law, which he's not doing by filing all these motions. and they don't file perjury charges because these are too difficult to prove.

and sending me to an early grave. I hope not.

Ya know what I might do mamma. I might e-mail the prosecutor on his case-she keeps in touch with me peridically as he's a year and a half left of is formal probation-and I might ask her about this. I can prove clearly and without a doubt that he blatantly lied in this las declaration- if she to prosecute this perjury, then this shit of saying whatever just to file a motion (stalking through the court) would stop.

that I just might do.

free

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