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missing my best friend:(
November 9, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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My
best friend of over a decade...told me she had too much going on in
her life, was ill and not wanting to talk to me anymore...ignores
my emails...I sent a couple this past year...we never had an
argument...were closer than sisters...I just miss her so much. How
do you forget about someone who moves on without you? She lives
across the states from me, so I can't just go see her... I worry
how she is...my heart is broken...is rthere any I can do? I have
other friends who are nice...but its not the same, her and I could
talk about anything, seen things the same way and I know in her
heart...she did love me....

November 9, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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Hey
BFG,

sorry to hear of
your loss. be kind to yourself and accept that you are
greiving.

It sounds like she
just can't keep up with a long distance relationship.

Sending you hugs
and support

November 9, 2010
12:00 am
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andii
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Oh
bfgirl I'm sor sorry. I don't know that there is anything ou can
do. Something similar happened to me with a friend who was closer
distancewise, and there was/is nothing I can do. She won't talk to
me even though we never argued either. I don't understand it, and
while I'm not angry or grieving anymore, she remains a part of my
heart and the ending of that friendship is a sad spot when I think
about her and how our friendship was at one time.

I'm sorry
bfgirl.

hugs

andii

November 9, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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the
only thing you can do is accept. everything ends: friendships,
love, life, everything. even time ends. i understand that this
sounds depressing but learnt to accept that too. i know it hurts,
and i am sorry for that pain, i have felt it before, and wouldnt
wish it on anyone, but instead of missing your friend, instead of
greiving for time you wont have with her, remember the time you did
have, i am sure you have many memories that are amazing. i
personally remember little dumb things, like when i cheated in a
board game so my friend could win, or when i was in victoria secret
with her and asked her whats a v-string? remember the memories you
have with her and be happy you have them, because in the end thats
all we ever have. sending you a big hug.

November 9, 2010
12:00 am
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CraigCo
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bfg,
(put some shoes on, would ya?!)

It's natural to
miss your long time friend but try not to dwell on it. It won't
accomplish much, save wasting the precious bit of time that you
have here on this globe. Also, you may reconnect with her again one
day. It's happened to me before. You just never know.

Hope you're
feeling better soon!

-Crg

Speaking of
friends MIO, where's Msg?

November 9, 2010
12:00 am
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CraigCo
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Rather 'MIA'

November 10, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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What
wonderful repsonses! I did not expect any, so thank you guys! ALOT!
I know Z, that most things do end, nothing stays the same, I agree
with you on that, just feel bad cause we were very close, she
always listened to me, and I always tried to be there for her too,
not sure what happened to us:( mydas...thank you too, I guess there
is nothing to do but try to just let it go...Andii, I am sorry you
also feel a lose and did not expect it, Its harder I think when you
do not expect to be "cut loose" I never thought that happen between
us! Craig...nice to see you here again my friend, I appreicate you
posting to me! i guess nothing does stay the same and people are
not always going to be there...no one, maybe all you really can do
it just count on YOURSELF in this world...i guess.

November 10, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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lol,
well i probably have multiple personalities, so countig on myself
is alot easier for me, one thing for sure, i always have someone to
talk to. they just dont always agree with me.

November 10, 2010
12:00 am
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andii
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zarathustra! LOL!

November 10, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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I
think I might have that going on...not different names but I go
through phases...widely varying dress, thoughts, ideas and
values...not sure if that is mpd...but yes, I do get what you mean,
I think! Lol!

November 11, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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I go
from extremes views and values in cycles...I sometimes been very
religious and black and white in thinking to being agnostic and
seeing only the gray...what is wrong with me?

November 11, 2010
12:00 am
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CraigCo
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bfg,

Ok, I give up!
What IS wrong with you?

But really, if
you're anything like me, the more your learn the more confused you
become.

One thing for
sure: Religion, politics, war/military are all fubar.

(M) Thx 4 poopin
in! Oops, I meant 'poppin'.

Which reminds me -
what ever happened to M Poppins? Hope all is well, Mary. U 2,
Destiny!

Yea, there's only
so much of this place one can take. If I'm feeling good & life
is ok, then I tend to avoid this largely 'unmoderated' site with
all of its sickening religious overtones. Poor bunch of brainwashed
bastards! lol

Nice to pop in
from time to time to read/respond to folks though.

Anyone heard
anything from gg? Maybe he's having that schnozz surgery? I forget
when he said that was supposed to happen.

November 11, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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BFG i
go through that same exact thing, phases, i even name my phases,
there basically extreme mood phases

my depressed
mindset is nilus my angry one is natas my party/social one is
dereon i call myself a king of my own world and these different
phases are like my generals that help me make basic decisions, and
they are all EXTREME, they have their own music tastes and
everything, like nilus loves very peaceful calm songs, dereon loves
hip hop and rap, natas is whismsical, he likes rock.

yeah, extreme
phases, i just noticed that i go through cycles, people tell me all
the time that i sometimes seem so happy/angry/depressed and that
its obvious, they say its like i am a different person, i used to
think its just a mask i put on to throw people opff and they dont
question me, but i even feel it when i am in a different mood, like
i want to go out more, or go drinking, or when i am angry, i have
outburst much more common and provoke fights, yeah, i am just
weird, this is what happens when you leave someone alone too
long

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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interesting bout the being left alone for too long comment...I
firmly believe that is what, depending on how you see things, is
what either helps us or hurts us...I never liked the concept of
"socialization" ever since I was like 8 yrs old, I heard alot about
it from my older brother, by reading his hs text books, esp
sociology, I was intrigued with the drug addict laying on the
street in one book, labeled social problems... from a very young
age, I was rather introspective and I think being in the
circumstances i was forced to be in, I learned more than most
psychologists bout people and evil and life in general... I was
very quiet in school, had no friends and no one really wanted to
talk to me either, so it was me myself and I basically for the most
part. I sat back and watched bullies, assholes and other jerks who
were peers and adults take over and I was never ok with things,
deep in my mind, I dispised the bullshit that I seen and was
supposed to be conditioned to believe in...not buying it now
either. Like these antibullying programs that are suppose to help
people that the popular kids put on, sell tshirts and have bake
sales and have seminars...its all pure bullshit and for sure,
nothing has changed and it never will and I do not care what anyone
says, I see still kids being hurt and blind eyes being turned,
people as humans are an complete and utter failure!

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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socialization is basically learning to be corrupt and act as if
you care in the process. What have learned since childhood? Those
who have make the rules and the rest can kiss their ass and hope
one day to have what they have...we are so purely sociopathic
creatures, we feed off each other and just want to see who or what
can be done for us...I see it everyday where I live, if i dare
venture out. I wish I could live someone on a beach far far away
from people and bullshit!

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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total
agreement, i put on masks for social interaction, people tend to
worry and complain if you are noticably alone, so i hid in plain
sight, i socialized, i talked and told jokes, but i never hung out
with anyone, never went to the movies or anything, i hate people, i
hate clubs and parties, i havent been to a party for over a year
now, and i am fine, or as fine as a suicidal person can be, but i
utterly hate parties, the thing is people LIKE me at parties, they
invite me and get angry when i dont come, another reason why most
of my friends abandoened me, but then again, they werent real
friends. one of my oldest "friends" who i have been for time and
agian for over ten years is moving to new york, which i am fine
with, but he tries to guilt trip me into going out, he tries to
make me take drugs again, after i quit more than a year ago, i tell
him "would you do that for me?" and he always replies no, so i tell
him its really fucked up for you to expect that from me, he has no
comment to that, he isnt a real friend, he only likes me for the
entertainment i bring him, if i ever needed him he wouldnt be
there, only one person has been there for me when i needed someone
and i love that woman, you might have heard me mention her name
before in the other threads, lol

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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good
for you, sounds more like a enemy to me or a user than a friend...I
may have, I am on here now and then,,,not so much anymore, trying
to cut back some.

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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i
miss you Ladeska...alot.

November 13, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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i am
really sorry barefoot girl.

i miss
john

but i am happy for
the over ten years of memories my old friend gave me, may he be
happy in his life, for he made me happy.

November 15, 2010
12:00 am
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BAREFOOTGIRL
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Hugs
to all! Yes there is something very serious wrong with me, i am the
first to admit it, I am not curable, so i have to live with it, it
helps to talk to others too, and then I think maybe i am sane and
everyone else who is brainwashed!

November 15, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
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im
not brainwashed! but my split personality, that guy has serious
issues!

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