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Marriage vows - Haggard's wife
November 6, 2006
11:03 am
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"Haggard confesses to 'lifelong' sexual problem"

From CNN: In a separate letter from Haggard's wife to the women of the congregation, also read by Stockstill, Gayle Haggard said while her heart is broken, she remains "committed to him until death do us part."

http://www.cnn.com/2006/US/11/.....index.html

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Ok now, is'nt this stupidity? She discovered her husband has been lying to her all the time and he has been having sex with male prostitutes.

And she says she's committed to him till death do us apart. What..!

This is like saying you promised to put a pacemaker in your heart until you died, but oops, the pacemaker ran out of battery but hey, since you made the promise, you should keep the dead pacemaker inside your body.

What a croc.

She could say she's doing it because of her children and then it would be ok.

I hate the phrase "Till Death do us apart". Things like this Haggard affair bring out the irrationality of marraige vows. They should be changed to "Till one of us turns out to be a moron".

November 6, 2006
11:27 am
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They should be changed to "Till one of us turns out to be a moron".

Thank you, guest, for my first real laugh today :0)

But seriously... this would create unimaginable havoc with civilization as we know it!!

November 6, 2006
12:11 pm
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lollipop3
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Guest....ROFL

November 6, 2006
12:25 pm
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Matteo
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And why it would be OK if she said that she was doing it for the sake of their children? I see no difference, really.

November 6, 2006
3:24 pm
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It would be ok because children are effected by divorces. Divorce is hard on the kids ofcourse.

If you're staying in a job because you can steal free paper clips, thats wrong. If you're staying in because you enjoy the job, thats different.

This man lied to her all these years. Should the woman still want to be with him? I dont think so. If they didnt have the 5 kids, it would be different.

Atleast I'd be pissed and really think about leaving my spouse if I found out they were having secret relations with the same sex and paying money too. Anyway its a personal choice I guess.

November 6, 2006
4:32 pm
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Worried_Dad
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I guess it depends what you mean by rational. Or vow.

The exchange of promises could be considered a contract--the vows usually include a promise of sexual fidelity--breaking that vow could be considered a deal breaker, or breach of contract that makes it ok to exit.

Another way to look at it is that the vow is about taking a unliateral stand about what marriage means to you in your integrity. Committment is very important to some poeple. They feel it is important to "stay the course" no matter what. I can respect that.

I guess whatever she wants to do is fine by me. Personally, I wqould divorce the creepy hypocrit and soak him for alimony.

Now having children--that seem like an irrational act.

November 10, 2006
10:52 am
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jastypes
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"They should be changed to "Till one of us turns out to be a moron".

If I ever get married again, these words are DEFINITELY going in there.

I don't know what I would do in her situation, because I'm not her. Perhaps it would depend on how remorseful my husband was, how willing he was to seek help and remain accountable, and how he treated me in general. I do know that she is perfectly justified in divorcing her husband under these circumstances, even in the eyes of the church and the God of the Bible. But she is not obligated to, and it is certainly her choice to make.

"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." If she believes this, as I do, then she knows that God will work this situation out for good.

November 10, 2006
8:12 pm
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Look at the sillyness of marraige vows - "till death do us apart" - and after two years they're finding lawers for who will have custody of the child. Great. Really impractical, unrealistic and statistically doesnt happen half of the time. After many many years this will be solved and marraige vows will be more practical (or whatever the union of the future comes out to be). Looking back, sillyness in human society generally tends to reduce as time goes. People start doing more things that make sense and they slowly let go of old irrational customs (including religion).

November 13, 2006
4:26 pm
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readyforachange
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jastypes...I absolutely LOVE that! To have and to hold, from this day forward, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, until one of us turns out to be a moron."

Then the whole thing is null and void.

Amen.

November 15, 2006
9:55 am
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The constitution of marriage was made for a partnership, that was suppose to be forever and this sinful word has glamourized sex and marriage.....most women think they want to BE married and get their hooks in a man and find out he was MR. Wrong and she is now MRS Wrong..
I think the want of it makes it look prettier than it is..AND Most guys don't want to settle down or they are blinded by her golden smile and the great sex only to find she becomes a demon after marriage...same goes for women
He is so great and he is everthing I ever wanted ---then you find out he is a drug addict and eats his toenails.....or snores with his mouth open..things you ignored when you were dating --for only 9 months and decided to get married...
I think you should date for two years and then go from there....I know this girl who married a guy after 3 months and I have only known her 2 weeks before that...she was so nice and happy...now 3 months after the marriage --saw her at the store, she is having to beg him for cigarettes.......and she looked totally unhappy and we could have predicted that to her --but she is in love
AND We all know love is blind
Watch yourselves and don't blame God for making rules that you should be able to live.
AMen

November 15, 2006
10:46 am
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bevdee
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Walkthruhim

Hi

So - if a woman is taken in by a man- say, a charmer-abuser or a toenail eater, who does not reveal his true self to the good woman until after the holy bonds of matrimoney are sealed, what is the woman to do?

Bevdee

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