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MamaC et al..Regarding support for Suicidal People
January 2, 2006
12:54 pm
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mamabear
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kasie,
You weren't intruding...any thread can be posted on by anyone

šŸ™‚

January 3, 2006
2:01 am
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mamacinnamon
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Kasie: Thank you for letting me know. I've found your thread.

January 3, 2006
2:56 am
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camra
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Worried_Dad, although tough love maybe the right thing to help someone I think it is wrong to tell someone that they have a future that lies ahead of them, thats not always true.
ex. with me I have been told all my life that I don't have a future,because of the disabilities. in other wards they said you don't have the ability to go to college I was told they weren't even sure if I could work.

Depression??? OH YEA!!!

to me being told you can't support yourself is like being told you might as well die..

However I am in college proveing them all wrong, so far anyway,,,

I will be fine as long as things keep going the way they are for me...

Im keeping a 3.4 in college and this makes me very encouraged !

camra

January 3, 2006
6:43 pm
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mamabear
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You think it is WRONG

January 3, 2006
6:45 pm
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mamabear
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whoops...don't know how I did that.

I meant to say
Camra, you think it's WRONG to tell someone that they have a future?

That doesn't make sense to me. Nobody knows what the future holds. Your case is a prime example.

I like to think that everyone CAN have a brighter future.

January 3, 2006
9:56 pm
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Worried_Dad
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Camra,

Way to go on the school! Whoever told you you couldn't go to college needs to get a life. I think education is so very important. If it wqere up to me, going to college would be mandatory.

That's right, I think public education should be K-16!

January 3, 2006
11:00 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Camra:

Congrats on proving them all wrong.

I have illnesses and cannot work, and now cannot do alot of house work, etc. and mom-in-law asked me what was the sense of me even living. I was shocked.. just aaid "you may have a point, I'd have to think on that one". I still cannot believe she would say that.

Whoever said that to you was WRONG, very wrong, and I am proud you are proving to them that you can do whatever you put your mind to. No, you don't owe them anything, specially not proof. The only one you owe to is yourself.

I also do not understand not telling someone they have a future. Everyone has a future whether it be blissful or aweful or just plain ol boring, at least until they are no more.

I am glad to see that you stood up and said "Yes, I can do what I will do". Good for you. šŸ™‚

January 3, 2006
11:20 pm
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camra
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Well I just ment never try to give out false hope for soemthing to someone. My sistuation is very different from most, and thats only because I have always put all my faith in GOD.

I know of someone right now that I am very concerned about. She is Mildly Mentally retarded. chances are she can never go to college, even worse she will probably never be given a chance too. This poor girl has 2 small children and I worry that someone will try to take her kids away from her if her sisituation should get worse.

The thing is am I gonna walk up to her and tell her to just go to college and that will take care of things.. NO because chances are she can't do that, she wasn't even able to graduate from highschool.

Now how do you assure that someones futrue will get better when they are faceing this type of thing????

YOU CAN"T !!!

do you see what I mean???

camra

January 3, 2006
11:44 pm
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mamacinnamon
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Camra:

I see what you mean, but I don't agree.

There are state programs in line to help your friend. She may not be able to go to college, but there are state funded, state schools that teach handicapped folks, diabilities to retardation, to do a trade that will support them. She is probably able to get state aid in other ways also. If you want to help your friend, take her by the hand and help her find these places coz they are there. I don't know the state you are in, but look under disability and rehabilitation first. They should be able to direct you to aid for mentally challenged folk too. If they cannot help you call your local courthouse, your state senator, colleges... don't leave any stone unturned.

You have always put your faith in God, so have I. And there is nothin he cannot or will not do if you ask in sincerity. And the work you do for your God you will be rewarded for someday. šŸ™‚

January 4, 2006
12:13 am
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camra
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mamacinnamon, umm, no actually your wrong about that, this women has 2 small childern they won't take her because of that, and due to the fact that she is working.(the best she can) in a regular job. Plus she is only "mildly retarded" that means she is not totally dependent.

Yes I know all about those types of places and I don't agree with them. It would be very degradeing for someone like her to work at a place like that, It wouldn't be what you would call.. being in an eviroment that is THE LEAST RESTRICTED ENVIORMENT."Under the IDEA, all students, including those with disabilities, are entitled to learn in a Least Restricted Environment (LRE)." This also means that a person if they can work has the right to do so in the least restricted enviorment.

People with disabilities have the same rights that everyone else has.
No body with disabilites who understands wants to work in a workshop for the severaly disabled.

I mean would YOU ?????

camra

January 4, 2006
1:34 am
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mamacinnamon
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Camra:

I would be happy to be able to work anywhere. I have been disabled for around 10 years now, and it took 5 years to get disability; so yes, I know what you are talking about. I went to all these places and I could not get help coz I was not ill enough or disabled enough. Now I cannot get help because I am beyond help. I could not even get a college to take me coz they didn't think I could do the work. So, I do know exactly what you are talking about, and yes.... I would be happy to receive any help I could have so that I could work where ever so my kids wouldn't have had to do without and my hubby wouldn't have had to work 7 nights a week just to get by.
I agree that people with disabilities have the same rights that everyone else has
so... YES I WOULD.

And you can still help your friend if you choose to. IF she cannot get the help? which just because you have small children does not disqualify you... not in my state. If anything it might actually win you a few points for wanting to better yourself. Whether your friend can get help or not.... you can still jump in there and help her. Find a way.

Oh, one more point I'd like to make. About bein very degrading... not bein able to do is very degrading. Before I became ill I had a great job in a law office and I made good money. So even the intelligent and talented folks can fall, and not feel degraded by receiving help where ever they can get it. I think the only ones that feel degraded by receiving help are those that think they are better than "those folks" in
"those places" as you put it. Be grateful for what you have now Camra, coz you never know when things may change.

January 4, 2006
1:52 am
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mamacinnamon
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My addition stinks tonight. I wanted to clairfy coz my numbers don't make sense. I was disabled 10 years ago. I didn't file for disability until almost 5 years till my statute of limitations was up coz I wanted fixed and not written off by the doctors as unfortunately some do if they know you have filed. Then took 5 years to get a favorable judgment. Ok, now my numbers add up and I'm comfy. šŸ™‚

January 4, 2006
2:20 am
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camra
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Ok let me see if Im getting this right, You worked in a sheltered workshop??? because that is what im talking about, working in sheltered work shop. They don't usually pay good enough to support a family on, infact where im at they pay like 50 60 bucks a week,, you deffeinly can't support children on that.

if you did you deffinetly are a better person then I am, cuz Id never do something like that,,, not ever...

and yes the college tried to tell me the same thing, but I refused to accept what they were saying to me and I fought and won. I called state advocatcy.. Not only did I win this right, I also got accomedations too. I imagin the only reason the college didn't want to accept you is because they do not want to give out accomdations. Colleges do not like to do things like that..

if you want to go to college call state advocacy,,, YOu do have ADA rights !!! besides being MR or haveing been in a serious accident that caused sever brain damage I can't see any reason why you can't go to college... Uless Im missging something here,, I could be..

camra

January 4, 2006
2:36 am
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mamacinnamon
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Camra:

No you didn't get it quite all there. Let me explain.

I AM a college graduate years ago. I had a great job that paid good. I became ill and tried to get help and did not file for disability coz I knew thre the work comp cases, etc, that came thru the law office that some docs will write you off instead of trying to help you coz they don't want to deal w/ social security. So, I refrained from filing until my statute of limitations was up.

When I tried to file for help and could not get it was early in my illness and since my illness doesn't make you look ill then I could not get it. I did try to go to college, but based on my illness and the projected progression NO a college would not take me... to big a liability. Then when I got ill enough to get help it was to late because now I cannot work at all. Even the Judge's vocational specialist said I could not hold any job.

No, I have not worked in a sheltered workshop, but I do know several wonderful mentally challenged folks that do. They may not make enough to totally support a family, but most folks that work in places like that have other state aid to help.

What I said was to the following comment you said...."People with disabilities have the same rights that everyone else has. No body with disabilites who understands wants to work in a workshop for the severaly disabled." To answer again. YES everyone should have the same rights. and YES, if I could work in a workshop for the disabled I would. It's not always what we want, you are correct that probably nobody would want to, BUT if it were the difference in getting by and losing my kids then yes, I would gladly work in a workshop. The ones we have in my area are not bad places to work, in fact the two ladies I know that do work there like it, and yes, they are definitely mentally challenged.

I commend you on your winning your case and on your accomodations. That is definitely an accomplishment and I don't take what you have done lightly, specially if it made a difference for other folks.

And I will say again.... you can help your friend. Look at every avenue including church, individual, professional. There are quite a few that need a tax write off, for lack of any better way of saying it, and would be willing to help put your friend thru a vocational school or some similar type program. There is always help, it's just finding it. I wish you the very best in helping your friend.

January 4, 2006
3:19 am
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camra
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well no im not saying she would lose them cuz of no job, she has other things going on.

It is quite different to have a college degree haveing been able to do so, then not ever being able to do so.

Did you know you can go to college via computer?

lot of people are now doing this. It might be an option you might look into.

Anyway my friend will not listen to anything I say, I can not even get her to get her highschool diploma Iv tried talking her into but, she doesn't want to, now remember she is MMR at this point right now she doesn't understand the need too.. Its a whole different ball game when your talking about MMR..

and my sistuation is much more exstesive then what I have said here. see I was dx'ed with MR as a child then later in life found out i was misdiagnosed. I had to fight for the proper dx ,, but as you can imagin its like a domino effect, and its something thats very hard to get rid of once dx'ed the additudes you have to deal with are unreal!

Id like to try to help her with all these options but she doesn't even know she is MMR,, I don't really know how to go about getting her help ,,, I see a huge fall comeing in her life ,, I don't know what to do,,, can't get anyone to listen to me either,,,

Of course Id never walk infront of her or inback of her, I will walk with her.. inother words I won't go and try to help her behind her back. thats not my way...

camra

January 4, 2006
3:52 am
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camra
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PS. if they are telling you that your to big of a liability then your ADA rights are being walked on.

Disability = respect for the individual, there is no respect in telling someone they are a liability for any reason what so ever.
ya know I wouldn't take that if I were you I get myself an advocate who knows ADA law .

Also I deffeinlty don't think shelterd workshops are decent places to work. In my opioin they are useing those people for very little money,, I think its pretty sad,,,

camra

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