Of course.

Sounds a wonderfully supportive family Zinnie. Her brothers and your husband and yourself are right to feel proud. Clearly you have all been to hell and back at the hands of this man.

And yet remained strong and committed to making things better for others. And working together as a family in the true sense of the word.

Ok, so now I wish ALL of you, Lisa, her brothers, her husband and her Mum and Dad ALL a wonderful Christmas and a peaceful and loving new year

Thank you for sharing it Zinnie. I am sure many will find hope from this.

love Sleepless

Hi Kasie,

Then by all means... hang on and don't file until you are gone!

Do not put Little Man through the drama of Christmas with his Dad. You don't have to answer his calls. You don't have to let him take the boy either. Possession technically? Is nine tenths of the law.

File for your taxes immediately after the first of the year - ask for an automatic refund. As soon as you get the money? Close the accounts. Get a cash loaded credit card - use that. Do NOT have your mail forwarded or your ex can send you a "dummy" envelope - marked "DO NOT FORWARD - RETURN ADDRESS REQUESTED" and the post office will send him whatever address you gave.

Ahead of time, contact a womans shelter and have it set up to where they will meet you at the bus stop.

How much stuff will you have?

Z.

Don't know if I said, but we were all going to visit, his parent's at a family ranch, driving ~ 32 hours away. All his brothers/sisters would be there, first re-union in yrs.

My son who is 23 said he would go with us, then on Friday he told my H he would go and fly back before newyears, so he would help drive up. My Daughter R was there, and she complained and said she diddn't want to spend ALL HER VACATION AWAY from friends.

Well H was in a mood on Saturday, going on and on about the kids, although son is 23 yrs and he has to work. How ungrateful they are how, they don't care, I told him, R can just complain, but she would go with us and we should be happy son will be with us, after all he is 23 yrs. he just took it out on me on saturday, mostly verbal it's okay..

Sunday moring, he is in his sweetest mood, he put up a blow up decoratioan in the front yard, and added some lights around the fence with out other daughter, except for feeding him before work, I tried to avoid hdim.

Finally told him abot conferencce, and I thought he would explode againk, but he said he would go with me.

Conference, was awful, this is her 2nd semester with grades that low, finals are 2nd week in January. She had ~ 40 missing homework assignments. She's not motiviated, her status at schooldoes not look good.

plus I got her lip all week-end. "When I got F's you didnd't punish me, now that I'm doing better 2 d & 1 F, your punishing me instead of being happy for my progress" etc. etc. I'm getting on the computer, I would normally not be doing homework now so why can't I use it? Logic didn't make sense to me, but nothing does lately.

H on the way home today gave me an earful, just want to give up..

Then at home he tells me, since "everyone" was complaining about the trip, he decided to buy a pllane ticket and go on his own....so he is leaving us, we don't mean anything family mean nothing.... he's reasoning he hasn't spent time with his amily for yearsl... well for the past 4 years he's either been working on christimas or in Iraq.

Then to top off the conversation hhe says he maybe deployed again in March, that is why the need to be with his family.... but does that mean he has do abandon us and leave us...I can't drive, I coud have helped him dirve. he didnd't even dconsult with me about his decision... so what do I do now stay home with the kids.... we have no money, he spend the money all of us would habe used for this trip on himeself....

What the hell am I going to do, do we mean nothing, it's different when he works, we celebrate either morning night or the night before or day after...I can't deal with it all it's too dstressful kids, H.. just weak, and pathetic here....

I'm sorry I haven't read up on post, can't concentrate now.. sorry

I should be mad I should be screaming, yet I feel, alone and abadnoned, why doesn't he care about me, why doesn't he care about us. Why can't he love us, I want to be a family...

If I don't talk to all you have a good holiday...I am so beat down now...

Kasie - I hope your okay...

Army,

Hold up... I asked you this on another thread - and if you answered me and I missed it I'm sorry. I'm also sorry I didn't get this from your name... I'm not the quickest some days - but, this guy is military?

Oh... please, please, please tell me he is military - because then if he is - I can walk you through seeing his sorry ass thrown in Levanworth!

Z.

Kasie,

My cyber sister. I started this note like 5 times in the last hour. As I am writing this I still have tears streaming down my face.

I'm sorry I was not here, personally when you left. I want you to know that I love you and you too are in my heart.

You were like tthe sister I never had, you understood, you were always in my mind, I always worried about you...being alone with little man.

I have the poem/song your mom use to sing to you...It's in my wallet, and the butterfly one too.

take care I will think of you everyday. Kasie, you are a special person who came into my life, when I needed someone. I will not lie, I miss you already.

This is too hard...

ArmyAngel