Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
kroika's essay: Pornography and Sexual Health
September 20, 2006
8:31 pm
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Just had an email from a sociologist acquaintance from another group I belong to. She writes: "one of
my favorite bits of
writing on this is a chapter in Naomi Wolf's The
Beauty Myth. It
captures the difference between erotica and
porn--an important one, I
think, becuase we can be pro-sex and pro-erotica
and still find porn
offensive and diminishing."

So, it's off to read Naomi Wolf... Very soon. Just thought I'd pass along the reference right now in case anyone is interested. kroika

September 25, 2006
7:27 pm
Avatar
lovetocrochet
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Did you read through this yet? What did it have to say? I'm interested...

September 26, 2006
6:38 pm
Avatar
confused_in_canada
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Sorry I didn't read this sooner, great paper. The only pointer I would have made, would have been to put in more of what you thought and such, and less quotes. More paraphrasing, and then footnote referencing what you paraphrased from... 😉

September 26, 2006
7:55 pm
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Hi ltc and cic,

Nice to see you both here.

Thanks for feedback, cic.

Ltc, I did have a look at Naomi Wolf's book, which is copyright 1990. I've had it sitting on my shelf for years.... one of a bunch I purchased at a yard sale ages ago. The chapter titled "Sex" looks at the connection between pornography and consumer culture, and the messages given to women about their sexuality. I don't think I can summarize the whole chapter here at the moment, but it gives food for thought and I would like to read it thoroughly and compare with Susan Griffin's "Pornography and Silence" which is 10 years older.

Both books were written before the Internet added its dynamic. That, of course, has had enormous impact, but the earlier books I find still valuable. Perhaps I can come back later and say more about Naomi Wolf specifically. Ltc, if you find a copy to read, I'm interested to know what you think.

September 28, 2006
2:43 pm
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Hi,

I still haven't finished reading Naomi Wolf... because the library finally got in the copy of "Pornified" by Pamela Paul that I had requested weeks ago. Quite a sobering read, and one I would recommend. It's very up-to-date (published in late 2005) and has both quantitative and qualitative data about the huge growth of the pornography industry and its effects on consumers and those around them.

October 3, 2006
1:12 am
Avatar
Anonymous
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Could you post the essay again or direct me where to find it? I'm dealing with this addiction with my husband...
Thanks!

October 3, 2006
1:38 am
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Hi 3A's

I just posted to you on the support side!

You can see my essay and this whole thread by clicking "view all posts" up in the top left corner of the screen. (Scroll all the way up to see the links)

I'm here for awhile if you want to talk about my essay after you read it.

take care, kroika

October 4, 2006
1:15 am
Avatar
Anonymous
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Just read your essay. Hope you got an A. I think you covered very well a huge topic that is growing quickly in so many directions with the help of the Internet.

Well done in my humble opinion as a woman who lives with an active sex addict using Internet porn.

Thanks for posting this!

October 4, 2006
1:23 am
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Hi 3A's,

Thanks for you comments, and I'm glad you found my paper interesting. I hadn't really given the topic much thought until I too, ran across problems caused by my exbf's compulsive porn-and-masturbation habit.

I was in for a rude awakening when I started doing my research.

Good luck with your own situation with your husband. I'd be most interested if you wish to share anything you know about recovery from this addiction, either from the addict's or the partner's point of view.

take care, kroika

October 11, 2006
12:40 am
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Bumping this up for new folks who may find it relevant.

To read my essay (which actually is a real essay that I wrote for a course on Women's Health), scroll up to the top of the screen and click "view all posts".

I have met a couple of new people over on the support side who are dealing with porn-addicted partners... happy to talk to you here or there.

October 20, 2006
1:38 am
Avatar
Guest
Guests

http://www.campaignforrealbeauty.ca/

Check out this link to a one-minute video clip showing the "evolution" of a normal woman to a supermodel. Another reminder of how our perceptions of beauty and desirability are continually being distorted by companies that make big money from doing that. (Naomi Wolf talks about "beauty pornography" in her book, The Beauty Myth.)

For newcomers to this site who clicked on this thread because pornography has affected you in some way, to read the essay referred to in the title of this thread (which actually is a real essay that I wrote for a course on Women's Health), scroll up to the top of the screen and click "view all posts".

I have met a several people on this site who are dealing with porn-addicted partners... if you want to discuss it, I'm here.

October 20, 2006
7:01 pm
Avatar
sleepless in uk
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thanks Kroik

Just love the Dove campaign...force feed my girls on it actually

once again we are singing from the same hymn sheet....if I could sing of course!

Love sleepless

October 20, 2006
10:54 pm
Avatar
Guest
Guests

hi sleepless,

I hope you mean you expose your daughters to the Dove "Real Beauty" campaign and do not feed them Dove soap!!

It's kind of sad to me that it seems we have to keep re-inventing the damned wheel and fighting the same battles over and over... but, such is life in the post-industrial capitalist world.

Must recharge my revolutionary fervor. (And sister, you're welcome to join my choir -- we don't have auditions. All you need is the desire to sing 🙂

Wishing you a weekend filled with true beauty

love, kroiks

October 21, 2006
7:20 am
Avatar
Worried_Dad
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 43
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

The film doesnt play right on my computer, but I definitely get the idea.

The sad part is that (I suspect) lots of people will interpret that video as a "How-to...makeover" instructional film. It could become required viewing in beauty schools across America.

Am I the only person here who recalls a female poster recently talking about how her slightly flawed boyfriend was about to get a "makeover" complete with radical hair re-styling and wardrobe change...just for her?

Superficiality and the willingness to embrace fantasy over reality is not something that men have a monoploy on.

October 21, 2006
8:42 am
Avatar
sleepless in uk
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Kroik..yikes; you found me out..my 3 girls are blowing bubbles every time they sneeze!!!

Thats a good point WD; I dont remember the post to which you refer but I do agree with you.

In fact, I would go so far as to suggest that it is not men per se who are responsible for women and young girls feeling the need to 'improve' the way they look by whatever means available. Most of the men I know usually say they prefer a woman who looks natural, and certainly a bit of extra weight seems much less of a problem for men then for women.

I think it is the beauty and fashion industries who are more responsible for setting ridiculous ideals...leaving our young impressionable teenagers feeling inadequate if they are not a size 0 or if they ever get a spot.

October 21, 2006
11:28 am
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Hi WD

if you get a chance to view the clip properly, what got me was that after the hair and the makeup there was some serious photoshopping in terms of elongating the neck and a bunch of other stuff that would require surgery to do in real life.

I think I know the female poster and her male friend's makeover that you're referring to. And while I agree with you that it shows that "packaging" is becoming increasingly important to males, the heavier burden is still on females to live up to a much narrower beauty standard than males are presented with.

And much more of a woman's identity is tied up in her appearance than is a man's. As you know I'm sure, a man can compensate for less than stellar looks by various work, academic, artistic or athletic achievements. A woman with similar achievements may garner respect, but will not necessarily be seen as more desirable.

Hey sleepless, those are mighty clean kids you have :-0

If any of your girls end up having anything to do with the fashion industry, I hope they can be a bit subversive and not fall into the groupthink of continuing to perpetuate that relentlessly unobtainable ideal which causes so much misery.

take care you guys....

October 21, 2006
11:40 am
Avatar
sleepless in uk
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

funny you should mention that......

you think very much along the lines of my wonderful middle daughter.

Ill tell you about her sometime

🙂

October 31, 2006
1:12 pm
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Here's a link to a new article by Robert Jensen that appeared on CommonDreams today:
http://www.commondreams.org/vi.....030-26.htm

Excellent, thought-provoking description of an encounter he had with a young male consumer of pornography, and the toll that privilege takes on human empathy. (About half-way down the article, which is not just about pornography but about how privilege damages empathy in other contexts as well.)

For newcomers to this site who clicked on this thread because pornography has affected you in some way, to read the essay referred to in the title of this thread (which actually is a real essay that I wrote for a course on Women's Health), scroll up to the top of the screen and click "view all posts".

I have met a several people on this site who are dealing with porn-addicted partners... if you want to discuss it, I'm here.

December 18, 2006
8:59 am
Avatar
sleepless in uk
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi

Bumping this up for Need to heal, hope nobody minds.

need you will have to click on view all posts to read it. Hope it helps, it helped me

sleepless

December 18, 2006
9:42 am
Avatar
Guest
Guests

Hi all

Thanks, sleepless. I see no reason why anyone would mind seeing my excellent paper on the "index" again. No one has to read it who doesn't want to. Are you codep or something??
:o))

December 18, 2006
11:19 am
Avatar
Guest
Guests

...where are my manners?

Need and Strong (and anyone else), I hope you will find reading my paper interesting and possibly even helpful in some way. It helped me a lot to research and write it.

I would be most grateful for any feedback you wish to give if you read it. And if this issue has an impact on your life in some way, I'm very willing to discuss it.

Take care and happy reading!

December 18, 2006
12:15 pm
Avatar
sleepless in uk
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

yes alright...point taken!!!

December 19, 2006
10:43 pm
Avatar
Worried_Dad
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 43
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi Kroikster!

Man, I feel like a woman!

That was a joke.

I am so funny.

I haven't really changed my assessment of your paper as being kind of floppsy, excessively PC and rhetoric-heavy, for a nursing paper...I am kind of anal-retentive that way, as you have probably noticed.

But you know, your paper (or, as I call it in private, "that darned thing") has stuck under my skin all this time, and believe it or not I still have warm feelings about your effort.

It's because I think that nurses have a unique opportunity and also responsibility to act as educators. And I am thrilled that you feel that way, too.

It is remarkable to hear a nurse who has a real desire to help patients with "sexual health" issues. These days, that is kind of un-PC.

So I feel that you and I are essentially on the same team professionally, even if we have different theoretical starting points....I think we both are groping towards a similar ending point.

That ending point is about how Helping Professionals can actually help their clients/patients be more well-informed, empowered, happier and healthier.

I salute you, Kroika, and hope that we will have many useful and interesting conversations branching from the topic you have raised here.

Let's bust a move.

February 12, 2007
12:02 pm
Avatar
Guest
Guests

This may be of interest for anyone with access to CBC Newsworld. Being broadcast tomorrow:

THE LENS
(Tuesday February 13 at 10pm Et/PT on CBC Newsworld)
A PERFECT FAKE

Described as "perversely compelling" (Fresh Magazine), A Perfect Fake explores the emerging market of hyper-realistic simulations of real women in the increasingly popular world of cyberspace pornography.

Director Marc De Guerre also introduces viewers to several men in Japan who have taken things to an extreme, with one showing off his collection of over 40 love dolls in an apartment he rents especially for them. These dolls serve as confidants and sexual partners, and to the men who own and love them, each 'girl' is as unique as a snowflake.
http://www.cbc.ca/thelens/prog.....30207.html

February 12, 2007
12:34 pm
Avatar
Matteo
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: 2
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline
100sp_Permalink sp_Print

"These dolls serve as confidants and sexual partners, and to the men who own and love them, each 'girl' is as unique as a snowflake." - My mind went blank.............

I saw a movie long time ago about serial killers, and there was a guy who was talking about having conversations with the line of skulls of his victims (women) and was asking himself how crazy is that. I wonder if those guys ask themselves the same question. They may lack the capacity though because that guy's IQ was extremely high. I'm perplexed.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 349
Currently Online:
28
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 111047
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38581
Posts: 714357
Newest Members:
jron1945bas, juliaopty, uoi, jamescortes, rickymorgan3165, anna11
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved.
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer | Do Not Sell My Personal Information