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Just who is a "friend" and who is not?
April 27, 2006
3:14 pm
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red blonde
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Know this happened to me twice: My significant other (SO)best friend from work & we "double dated" My SO and I now have problems. I vented to her but didn't know SO was also venting to her. SO went out with friends, I called HER, asked her out, she would see me after she put kids to bed. We were to meet at bar, I went, sat there alone for 2 hrs., felt awkward told barperson needed to leave,would be back, tell her to wait. Driving down street, bar name pops in head, go there, SO and she were at other bar...IS THIS MY "FRIEND"? SO says I'm blowing this out of proportion. She had called him to meet her!

April 27, 2006
3:15 pm
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red blonde
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HIS BEST FRIEND IS CO-WORKER, I am talking about HIS wife.

April 27, 2006
4:10 pm
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Anonymous
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red blonde,

If I understand correctly, your SO and his best friend's wife have met twice at a bar.

While nothing may be going on (yet), it is wrong for them to meet like that without informing you and your friend's husband. You aren't blowing this out of proportion. Your SO ought to be honest and above board with you.

Seeker

April 27, 2006
10:58 pm
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red blonde
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Seekerw

Nothing may be going on yet..His best friend is really really nice and probably doen't know that she has already been seeing another man (not my SO) may not have been sexually intimate but sure had a huge purple hickey on her neck! I feel sorrier for him than myself. I just feel betrayed. Why can't my SO see the "Light"? Or is he starting to think with the little head instead of the one on his shoulders?

April 27, 2006
11:55 pm
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Anonymous
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red blonde,

I get it now. Thank goodness your SO isn't involved with her.

This is a sticky situation. I've seen Ann Landers and other adavice columnists consistently advise against telling the person you suspect is being cheated on.

You have a right to feel the way you do, but it might be best to just keep this to yourself and not tell your SO's best friend.

I'll be interested to see what others have to say about this.

Take care,
Seeker

May 1, 2006
1:53 am
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red blonde
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That was only time that I found out about. She has done this to me before...says she was going to meet me and then went with her husband to meet my SO. Not going to tell her husband, just wish he and SO can see she has started nothing but trouble. Now she has set her eyes on the husband of another couple that we see every week. I talked to couple last thurs. about her...but not a word about her "Plans"...don't want to see them starting to have problems because of her...so I told them what she has done to me... therapist that my SO and I go to told him "this person is NOT her friend!" but WILL HE LISTEN TO REASON FROM AN OBJECTIVE SOURCE? We'll see! talked to other people about her...one said "been watching..and THAT BUBBLE (meaning her) is going to burst sooner than she thinks!" She's been acting like she wants to get into anyone's pants...and not just the men's. I think she is one sick puppy. When I thought she was a friend, I told her stuff, He has told her stuff, too, now find out she twisted what both of us said to her and turned it back on us...but he defends her..This is not right! It has really hurt me! Hoping therapy works...

May 1, 2006
11:21 pm
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red blonde
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May 2, 2006
12:24 am
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Anonymous
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red blonde,

Man, I'm sorry to hear about this. I see the problem now. This woman is trolling around, apparently.

It's also not good when one person agrees to exclude his significant other (you, in this case) from his social life. What did your SO say when you told him this woman broke her promise to meet you, and the three of them met without including you?

Is there a way you could gently steer your SO away from this woman? I mean, suggest going out with other friends instead. Oh wait, you said that her husband is your SO's friend from work. That might be tricky.

May I ask why you would ask to meet with this woman when she's stood you up before? I'm just curious.

Seeker

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