I am in my early 20s and the only child at home still. I am very close with my parents and love them very much, but I think we may be an issue with boundaries.
Both of my parents suffered from alcholism before I was born. My mother has suffered from depression off and on my entire life. My older brother and I often say that it's very difficult to live up to her expectations. We constantly seek her approval. I feel very responsible for them. My parents aren't affectionate with each other. They have separate bedrooms. I have had trouble with relationships for the past four years. My ex-fiancee was contronlling and I tried meet his demands. My next boyfriend was clingy and irresponsible. I am aware men find me attractive and often get involved physically without knowing my partner properly. Over the past two years I have found it hard to be with one man for long periods as I often choose men that are emotionally unavailable. Usually when a men says they love me I can't leave quick enough. I have been prone to depression over the past few years and this affects my relationships as well. I am involved with a wonderful guy right now and I am scared that I'll screw things up again. He's moving 3200km to be with me. My parents are concervative Christians and disapprove of me living with someone. I am afraid of loosing their love, but I feel I need distance. My brother left the country for space, but he fought with my mother tremendously. I am afraid of leaving under bad cirrcumstances. I think we may have a codependent relationship, but I'm not sure. I feel that living in a remote community have made the relationship worse and I feel depressed again. I don't know if I should leave home now or wait till I'm done school or wait till I'm married. Please help.