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Hi! It's Good To Be Back!
November 10, 2006
7:58 am
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LA Rosa
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Telegraph for TUMBLEWEED.

Thank You for being your usual thoughtful self Tumbleweed...and hope we all have just that. 🙂

Love - La Rosa

November 10, 2006
11:40 am
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Yes, thank you Tumbleweed, I'm feeling much better today, and Yes, I just had to check if Nature's Sunshine Prod. was on the web...and did see that Nutri Calm is a very healthy way of reducing stress, building up the immune system using only natural ingredients, and is also conducive to good sleep.... along with some other good incentives as well. I've also been interested in learning more on the views of Philip G.Zimbardo in the near future.

As Shyness and Social Anxiety is quite complicated, especially when taking personal circumstances into consideration, as they must be... the following information is only a glimpse into this condition. Although I realise you have been learning much about this, I thought this may be of interest...

In the dynamics of the self-concept and in the tendency to self-actualization, are found the primary causes of Shyness and Social Disorder/Social Phobia. It seems that these conditions result from the introduction, in the self-concept, of the elements that 'obstruct' self-actualization. This obstruction is very damaging and experienced as discomfort - inasmuch as it precludes that a given force,self-actualization - expands. In the psychological field there are forces that drive us on in several directions...but when these forces are 'obstructed', again, we feel discomfort.

Instinctively, 'flight' becomes one's natural reaction, because, according to the obstructed self-concept - the person has no weapons to 'fight' the threat.

When avoidance of a situation is unavoidable, or in other situations, the inner force in the form of desire or need, is very intense.... people find ways to adapt. They develope behaviors in order not to allow the hostility, which they think/believe others harbour towards them, to come to the surface. Among such behaviors that are common, are changes in one's voice, the use of auxiliary verbs, the use of the verbal conditioned tense, milder gestures, and verbal economy. Through such actions, they judge that they can control the hostility that they think/believe exists in others. Concretely, they begin to speak in a lower voice, use expressions such as "I wonder whether you could...?" "Perhaps you might be able to..?" "Were it possible, I would like..."

The person who is not able to make these adaptions, or regards themselves insufficient...constantly feels that 'disintegration' is about to take place. In other words, living in constant apprehension.

*The successful process in overcoming the anxiety and anguish, is one which brings 'consistent' changes into the self-concept....and that is when the 'obstacles' begin to disintegrate. It would seem, Tumbleweed, that this process has already been in activated for at least a while. Until later, BBFN & Take Care

Love - La Rosa

November 10, 2006
11:52 am
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Hi all, Ty La Rosa. I looked on the web site, too, for Nature's Sunshine Products and found more info there than I have with the magazine I receive and the order forms I get. The products are all natural which is good and I can get them at my cost which is also helpful. I was able to get this bottle on sale as well so I thought why not try it and I'm glad I did. It has really made a difference for me. I see others on there are selling the products and don't know if they are also distributors or what, but I just looked where it said Nature's Sunshine because I know the products have a shelf life and also Nature's Sunshine keeps the ones under refrigeration which need it like bifidophilus for example, maybe fish oil capsules etc. I order by United Parcel Svc. which is quicker, but now in the cold weather the products arrive cold anyway.

November 10, 2006
12:12 pm
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I like that telegraph. Ty. Yes, for me the shyness thing has been ever since I can remember and my memory goes way back when I was around 2 yrs old, probably. I don't think I ever was what they call socialized. People send their children to pre school and day care centers etc. now to be socialized, but that was not an option then. Most of the time, there was just the animals for my company because there was seldom any other children around. Occasionally when people would visit, thats all. I learned right away that people were not fair just from that little interaction I had. When children were around, I was left to pick up after them as all my things had to be put away so maybe I decided then already it just wasn't worth it, I don't know. Anyway, now I don't have the patience for it anymore so it is not likely I will change now. I don't feel shy now like I did with the symptoms etc. I used to experience because I have raised my self esteem and self respect and I guess have accepted myself as I am for the most part. When you're alone so much, you get to take a good look at yourself, that can be a good thing. I don't envy my granddaughter who is much like me and I hope she will not have to go through what I had to. I try to help her now when I can as she does keep in touch with me. I'm glad that communication is there. Take care, all. Love and Hugs.

November 11, 2006
6:48 am
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LA Rosa
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Hello My Friends,

How are you Zinnie? I hope all is going well for you and your sister. Tumbles and LOUD and I are really having a great time together....and little LOUD sends his love and wants you to know, we're going to the park for a picnic tomorrow, meeting up with his adoring local doggie fans, at the duck pond.

Yes Tumbleweed, that is real GOOOD news!! I'm soo happy you decided to check it out!!:) You can see how easy it could be to miss out on those deductions that really were meant for You. It's hard to understand though, 'why' there is no mention about that sort of thing in the magazine! Well Done!! You went ahead and found out. It must come as more than a bit of a surprise, I'm sure. Some things do turn out well....things that you could never expect to.

I'll have to catch up with you all tomorrow, as I need to free up the telephone line. Bye Bye For Now.

Love - La Rosa

November 11, 2006
10:11 am
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A picnic tomorrow. Yeah! 🙂

November 12, 2006
11:34 am
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LA Rosa
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Hi Friends,

Thinking of you Zinnie, on what has turned out to be a perfect day for us - Tumbles, LOUD and myself, to go on our early summer picnic at the park. Gentle breezes and warm sunny weather, a chocka blocka deliciously yummy hamper...and of course plenty of laughs and smiles being shared... and lots of fun being had by us all. LOUD is full of beaming smiles and goofy grins, whilst somehow remaining to look particularly debonair, in his fetching sunhat and wraparounds.

That feeling of being or not being accepted, to me Tumbleweed, is such a crucial factor in the forming of our self concept. At an age when we have no way of understanding, the repercussions or consequences of our immature assessments and assumptions. Yet on we go, believing all the data we have processed to be true, when in reality it is loaded with incorrect information regarding ourselves and others, leaving us with all our creases to be ironed out... along the way. It's just so much more difficult though, when we are obstructed, and I think that a lack of interaction does have a huge bearing on how we perceive ourselves as being. It would seem that the limited amount of interaction we have with others, and how we perceive ourselves as being perceived by them, would also limit our ability to define ourselves adequately - never mind accurately, especially in our formative years when we're so very innocent and blindly trusting, ignorant and impressionable...and naturally wanting to be accepted for who we are...even if it is only conditional acceptance.

That dependency on others acceptance of us, unfortunately has meant that we'd undermined and undervalued the importance of our own self-acceptance -- until hopefully, we finally learned to value ourselves, and our own personal brand of self acceptance - that's independent of anyone elses acceptance of us... (although it's obviously very nice to have that too).

Congratuations Tumbleweed, for raising your level of self esteem and self respect and allowing yourself to have become more aware, assertive and probably somewhat more confident too, and no doubt feeling a lot more YOU. What a welcome difference into your life. You'd never want to change back...no need to pick up after others, unless You want to of course, which is a whole different ball game.

Your grandaughter is very lucky to have you as her grandmother...and it seems as though she knows it. 🙂 BBFN & Take Care

Love - La Rosa

November 12, 2006
1:40 pm
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Hi Everyone, What a great day for the picnic and for LOUD to run and play in the sunshine. Was hoping Z could join us, maybe later we'll see. 🙂

November 12, 2006
2:01 pm
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La Rosa, You are so right about the self acceptance thing. My childhood was very difficult for me, not compared to some who endured physical and emotional beatings, of course, but nevertheless it was difficult to be expected to be perfect at home, get good grades at school in the midst of others tormenting me including teachers who thought it was funny to laugh along with the others. How ignorant. Wish I'd known that then though. I can see what could lie ahead for my granddaughter in her desire to be accepted and I don't want her to pay the heavy price I had to pay, but I know I can only do so much. She is young and many lessons she will have to learn on her own, I know. I'm just glad we do have the communication though and hopefully it will help her in the future. Her family have told me things have been easier for her because she saw me doing things like riding on my son's Harley and encouraging her to accept an invitation to a friend's prom as she'd missed her own. I shared my experience with her of having a new prom dress, but no date and being made to go anyway for which I'm glad I went now regardless of circumstances. I told her it could be a once in a lifetime experience for her, too, and her date was a friend, someone who had been a friend at school so she was glad she went. She was nervous, but I told her just go anyway and enjoy yourself. She only has 2 friends who are close friends. And others occasionally, but it is important to interact with others, I know. I still have such little interaction with others that I have to figure out how to entertain myself whether its studying something, listening to tapes, reading, watching dvd's or whatever. I have to say though it all gets old and I just have to take myself out sometimes, go have lunch somewhere or something. It gets to be too confining otherwise. I have to fight feeling down some days, but at least I know a little more now of who I am and that helps. Hope you're having a good day or evening there. Love and Hugs.

November 12, 2006
2:33 pm
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Zinnie
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What is this a picnic Down Under?

LOUD... send the Magic Carpet - I'm on the West Coast right now...

Can't wait to see everyone. I will bring some wonderful avocado's with me.

WHOOOOOOOSSSSHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

November 12, 2006
5:08 pm
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Z, You made it. Yes, a picnic Down Under this time. Oh, I know those are going to be good avacados. What a treat. Hope LOUD likes them, too. 🙂

November 12, 2006
7:06 pm
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Oh my... look at the spread! Wow!

I see you three have indeed been busy and having a good time.

I am so glad that the little red LOUD guy has found two such beautiful friends.

I brought several pounds of avocado's - fresh from California, where they are still $1.00 per lb. Imagine my surprise when I moved to Montreal, and I could only get them for about six or eight weeks out of the year - and 20 years ago... they were close to $2.00 EACH! When I moved to Texas, the price dropped to about $1.25 each. Growing up we had an avocado tree in our back yard so they were free... but, even still they were so cheap in the stores.

So, my friends - now that I have told you of my avocado obsession... pull up a chair and enjoy some fresh sliced avocado's on the fresh tacos complete with home made tortillas that I have prepared.

Also, enjoy the fresh guacamole, as well as the pico dip I made - some espcially for my Tumblin' Friend... no chicken, instead I substituted portabello mushrooms, grilled and spiced just so.

Enjoy...

November 12, 2006
9:23 pm
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Z, You certainly knew I was counting on you for the tacos and guacamole and the pico dip is a new one to me, but I've heard those mushrooms are great. Yes, its great fun. Ty, La Rosa for the invitation. Later, all. 🙂

November 13, 2006
12:46 pm
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LA Rosa
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(((ZINNIE!!)))

You ARE a beautiful surprise Zinnie!! ...and I'm just sooo glad to see you again!!:) This is certainly 'the' most perfect Down Under picnic ever! Just soo brilliant that you could WHOOOOOSSHH on over to be with us.

Our picnic today must have broken new dimensions, showing just what can be done, when you have mutual good friends all wanting to have some fun in the park together. There's a lot to be said for LOUD's magic carpet too. 🙂

Mmmm the fresh avocado's really do taste good on the fresh tacos Zinnie ...and look at all you've brought! Oh yes, that's right, your obsession.:) You may like our strawberry desert as the strawberries are just fresh in season and right at their best, ripe, plump and ever so succulent. Now I wonder what 'guacamole' taste like? My curiosity is really stirred because you see...I've never tried tried them before! Ah...there are so many lovely tasty dishes to savour, Zinnie and Tumbles. Of course just feel free to help yourselves to tea and refeshments.

Underneath the the shady tree near the duck pond, LOUD has met up with all his faithful fans and new-found pals, as they gaze and listen to him in complete fasination....and perhaps trying to work out the accent. Yes, I really do think we ought to do this more often..... 🙂

Love - La Rosa

November 13, 2006
1:51 pm
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Hi all, I'm in for the strawberry dessert, sounds so refreshing. I couldn't find my guacamole recipe, but it is the most wonderful dip made from avacados with tiny pieces of tomatoes in it and I think a little lemon and forget what else. I used to order this huge taco salad and they used to serve guacamole, sour cream and salsa, all three to put on it or take your choice. They were not that generous the last time I ordered the taco salad there last summer. I should request that they bring the guacamole back again, I think and maybe they will. Think I'll look up a recipe on the web for that until I find mine. I know that Z would have the best recipe though. Take care, all. Love, TW

November 14, 2006
10:24 am
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Hi Friends,

Yes, I'll be into some strawberry desert too, but what I'm really looking forward to trying, is the guacamole dip.

Just out of curiosity, I though I'd check to see if it was in my old recipe book, and to my surprise..... there it was! (the Down Under recipe) I can't really say yet, if it's a good recipe or not, but I can say that it already has my taste buds making my mouth water. 🙂

Please excuse my delay in replying to your posting on the 12th Tumbleweed, as I needed a little more time to think on some of the personal issues it triggered for me. Until then.... BBFN & Take Care

Love - La Rosa

November 14, 2006
1:11 pm
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Hi all, La Rosa, I've been trying to post on a lighter note though usually I'm not good at it as I don't have much of a sense of humor, I don't think. If you want to post about anything though, I'll be here to listen if nothing else. My other thread is nearly gone and I only check in here now to see if I need to respond to someone. The recipe I looked up on the web sounded similar to the one I had with avacado, lemon juice though it also said lime juice could be used, tomato cut in small pieces, finely chopped onion and that was it. It suggested when avacados are very expensive it is possible to fill in with cream cheese to make the dip go further. Z, I'm looking forward to you stopping in and seeing the avacado recipe as I'd like your input on it, okay. I know you usually have something special to add to these recipes. Take care, all. Love, TW

November 14, 2006
9:35 pm
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Hi Tumbleweed, thank you for your concern, and that I felt sure you would be there if I wanted to talk about anything. I've been giving much thought to our issue concerning what may feel like a certain lack of integration within society as a whole. I say 'our' issue, because I too haven't been interacting with others nearly as much as I think is best for me. This is an area I'm wanting to improve my own personal understanding of...and I think you may also be wanting more of that as well. That could mean it's time for me to get more personal than I have been...and has just made me search within myself deeper than usual, probably because it concerns not only myself - but specifically your good self. Before talking to you about it, Tumbleweed, I think you may get something out of this piece on HUMOR - or humour as it's spelt here ....

But aren't some topics, endeavours, and industries too serious for humour?

Well?

"....A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." - Exerpt from PS magazine, the army's journal of preventative maintenance.

"I've fallen and can't get up." - Message spray-painted on a destroyed home by survivors of Hurricane Andrew.

The fact is, we human beings actually laugh most about those things most serious to us: Money ("Inflation is what let's you live in a more expensive house without having to move.") - sex ("If it's such a private thing, why do we have to do it with another person?") - our children ("If Abraham's son had been a teenager, it wouldn't have been a sacrifice!") - even death ("Oscar Wilde's actual last words: "Either this wallpaper goes or I do."). It's one of the ways we cope. In fact, some researchers conjecture that this is the biological function of humour - to help us get serious!

In actual fact, the more stressful your objective, the more that people could use appropriate humour to help them in confronting and dealing with it effectively.

But aren't some people just unfunny - and isn't that okay?

Remember: Humour isn't about 'performing'. It's about 'creativity'....finding unusual connections. This is all kids do when they play - make unexpected connections. Okay, here's a question: Are you a former child? Because if you are, you're naturally endowed with a sense of humour!

People are taught to use their natural sense of humour in ways that work for them. As just one example, it's perfectly fine to let others provide the humour while you just appreciate it. In fact, this might make you the most popular person in the workplace! The key point is, you don't have to be ready with a joke. Just be ready more often, with a SMILE.:)

Until later - love from - La Rosa:)

it you actually do have a sense of humour

November 14, 2006
10:40 pm
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Hi all, Glad you let me know what had triggered for you, La Rosa, because I didn't want to get so serious on here as to make anyone feel badly about anything. I see that humor makes life easier and have felt it would be helpful. The other thing is though when you have little or no interaction with others, there isn't much of an opportunity to use humor, except perhaps to laugh at yourself when you do something foolish or whatever. I am not the typical Leo because most times people feel Leos are this fun loving person, but because of other planets in my sign my Leo traits are toned down. I can occasionally roar when I'm feeling upset about something, but not nearly as often anymore. I went from little interaction with people in my building to none for the most part. And thats really okay with me for now at least. I wouldn't want someone at my door all the time. Today, for example I had a very busy day cleaning cupboards and doing laundry. I was tired and aching and wouldn't have been good company for anyone. I have a lot of catching up to do here again. How would you plan to interact more with people? Do you have any ideas about it yet? Just curious. 🙂

November 15, 2006
3:37 pm
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LA Rosa
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Hi Friends

Hoping you have a day that makes you feel like smiling often, letting you appreciate some of those simpler pleasures. Thank you Zinnie for completing our wonderful little get-together picnic at the park, and thank you Tumbles, for all your help and great company. LOUD is still letting me know just how much he enjoyed himself...:)

Yes Tumbleweed,(shy pussycat Leo:)) I can appreciate your curiosity and your question that's led me to really understand clearer the crises facing society today...and I'm sorry it's so difficult establishing a healthy level of social interaction. I hadn't fully realised how expensive the technological age of the 20th century had actually cost us - in a social sense. Society now has us insulated and isolated...and far removed from anything like it ever used to be fifty years ago. It also lets me see how devastating it must surely be, for the elderly and disadvantaged, who really do need the help that social interaction once would've provided...as people are simply being deprived of other human interaction through difficult cicumstances, sometimes beyond their control. We are social beings. However, this way of living is starting to resemble an olf fashioned science fiction movie, where social interaction has almost been eliminated.

I wish I had an inspirational answer right now, but at the moment there are only a few personal choices that may improve with time and effort. Take Care All...

Love - La Rosa

November 15, 2006
4:05 pm
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Hi all, Yes, it does seem people will e-mail more than they will call or write a letter or card anymore. IM saves on the phone calls, I guess. I know I can't make long distance calls and keep my computer set up, too, so I just keep my set up here. That way I can also look up things I want to know more about very quickly etc. It is easier for people who work to keep in touch this way, too, at their convenience. However, it really promotes further isolation and becomes addictive to feel you have to get on the computer everyday and check messages etc. I had another busy day of cleaning cupboards here so I have only checked here a couple of times today. I did look up Melody Beattie's web site and read about her other books. Soon she will be having more things on her site, I think like a discussion board or something like that. So, I'm going to keep an eye on it as her books have helped me a lot. Take care, all. Later. 🙂

November 16, 2006
5:35 pm
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La Rosa, It looks like its time to let my thread go on Support threads, but I wanted to let you know I will check in like I've been doing. At the top of the threads, it keeps saying not to just have a nickname, anyway, so maybe the time has come to let it go. I feel badly to do it, but I honestly don't know what to post on it anymore. I appreciate that you tried to help me keep it going. It was nice of you to post on both threads. I'll check later, okay. Take care. Love, TW

November 17, 2006
1:44 am
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The little red LOUD dog LEAPS on to the scene!

"Where are they, where are they?" he bellows looking for his buddies - the Beautiful La Rosa, and his Forever Favorite Pal... The Tumblin' Gal.

Fortunately for the rest of the world (who are not all prepared for LOUD's exhuberantly LOUD ways) - he spots his two friends.

"Ladies... we have not hit a new scene lately! What shall we do, what shall we do?"

Now... Tumbles knows that La Rosa has been off for a bit, so she is not quite aware of how much of a "Scenester" the LOUD dog has become; so she tries to mentally prepare La Rosa for what might happen. Of course with LOUD one never knows!!

The magic carpet arrives, and the Trio of friends fly off... Tumbles and La Rosa waiting in wonderment of where their LOUD pal is taking them now...

November 17, 2006
2:12 am
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Oh also...

Ladies, don't forget to add a dash of lemon juice to your guacamole - it helps to keep the avocado's from turning brown - keeps that nice green color.

Tumbles - yes, I have "stretched" the dip by adding either cream cheese or mayo - which ever you prefer. The cream cheese makes for a thicker dip, the mayo gives is a somewhat thinner consistency, but is also just as tasty.

Z.

November 17, 2006
9:55 am
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Hi all, La Rosa, I hope you're ready for another adventure with LOUD. Z, thankyou for the tips on the guacamole. I'm glad I do use lemon juice in it. I do that with other things like apple pie etc. to prevent the browning on the fruit. Have never used lime as much. There were a lot of good Mexican recipes on that site when I looked up guacamole. I made the pudding one with millet as I never know what to do with millet and I substitued it for the cream of wheat the recipe called for. Not bad, but I didn't care for the yogurt I had to go with it as I had plain yogurt. It called for vanilla. Take care, all. Love, TW

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