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Confused, Hurt, and Alone
August 17, 2013
10:23 am
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Forum Posts: 0
Member Since:
August 17, 2013
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Okay first let me start by saying this situation I'm going through right now has a long history and anyone who can give me advice on how to cope with my problems I am very greatful. I think I finally recovered fom my depression I was in for about a year. A couple of years ago my girlfriend Sam broke up with me and we tried to be friends still but we began to drift farther apart. A month later I realized she moved and that I should do the same.  So a met a girl named Shay and we got along right away and soon she became my girlfriend. One day Sam came up to me and questined me about my new girlfriend, because we were still friends at the time. However when Sam started to have problems in her relationship with this guy, she started flirting with me while I was going out with Shay. I walked Sam home from school one day and she admitted to me that she had commitent issues and wished things were different between us. The history between Sam and I was very deep, she the only person who understood me completely and accepted me fully. We had a great relationship until she began liking this guy and she told me how she only likes me as a friend now. I have to admit I took this news pretty hard to the point where I actually threaten to hurt myself because she was leading me on for the last few weeks.  After that she apolgized to me multiple times for what happened between us but I knew we both had so many problems going on at the same time we couldn't help each other. Now back to Shay, our relationship was going well until she noticed some changs about me. I was really struggling to stay faithful because Sam was coming on to me strong and I wanted nothing more than to be with her. Although I remember that Sam was the one who caused me so much pain for about two years and I have Shay who loves me and is very commited. I was also dealing with my mother, my insomnia, and my sick grandmother. So I finially got the courage to confront Sam and tell her that i'm in a relationship and that she really needed to leave me alone because I love Shay. Everything seem to be going good until the wrost happened my father came home Thursday night and told me my grandmother passed away and I went to school the next morning I recieved a phone call from Shay's  parents to tell me that she passed away that morning and it just didn't seem real. I was aware that she was under the weather but I didn't realize how bad it was because she let me come over for two weeks. Shay died from lymphoma cancer at the age of 16. I have been trying to recover since then and it's so hard.  It was hard on body and mind, I didn't eat as much and hardly left the house my friends got really worried. I loved Shay with all my heart but now she's gone and I feel so lonely and vulnerable.Just recently Sam brought to my attention that she hated how we stopped talking to each other and after a lot of thinking I could really use a friend. Although some of my friends who know about me and Sam's history don't agree with this choice. Even though Sam said she's is willing to start over. I want to give her a seocnd chance but my friends think she will hurt me again but I still trust her. What should I do? Should I give her another chance? and how can I over come this depression about Shay because I want to get better and be healthy again.

August 23, 2013
7:14 pm
Orange, CA
Forum Posts: 44
Member Since:
February 21, 2013
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I can really understand what you must be going through with so much confusion in your life,with you losing you grandmother and girlfriend at the same time and that too at such a tender age.But you alone will have to cope with this situation and not give up hope.you still have a few friends who think about you and are trying to help you distinguish between what is right and what is wrong,so listen to them and stay away from Sam.She has hurt you once and she will hurt you again,so stay away.You are still very young and if you stay sane,which I feel you owe it to Shay,then you will be able to cope well.You might take a little time to get out of the situation,but you certainly will,if you think you can,and I am sure will find another girl as good as Shay,who will love you for what you are.So donot give up hope.

November 23, 2013
1:52 am
Edward Fruitman
New York City, Manhattan, Long Island
Forum Posts: 23
Member Since:
November 21, 2013
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You may not like what I say, but its true that you are thinking too much about your problems and miseries. Forget about them, and concentrate on the way others around you behave. If you are alone, it does not mean you are the worst in your community. Several others will be passing through even more difficult situation in the real life. You are healthy, what's more worth it is. Your mother is not, she is a part of your life, definitely. However, you are free to live your life. Cool down yourself. Try to get social with others, and the attention from personal life problems will emit. The luck smiles on those who do not think about problems.

January 9, 2015
1:58 am
Forum Posts: 3
Member Since:
November 29, 2014
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Oftentimes, the first step to getting over with a lot of problems is to look at the positive things in life. In your case there may not seem to be any good thing as of the moment but if you look at the things that you have accomplished so far, you can still see that ray of hope that this too shall come to pass.

January 31, 2015
12:08 am
Forum Posts: 10
Member Since:
January 30, 2015
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rakz105 said:

Oftentimes, the first step to getting over with a lot of problems is to look at the positive things in life. In your case there may not seem to be any good thing as of the moment but if you look at the things that you have accomplished so far, you can still see that ray of hope that this too shall come to pass.

Well said.
Think of the other side when you're feeling down. 

April 23, 2015
1:13 am
Forum Posts: 15
Member Since:
April 22, 2015
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Honestly speaking, we do really know what to do, we just don't know how to begin.


Listen to your mind before to your heart. Cause sometimes, good decisions are made by the brain, not with the heart..

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