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Codi's Corner
February 3, 2008
4:14 pm
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Codi202
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February 3, 2008
7:33 pm
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I cant seem to pull this up but I love it, Codi's corner. love it and keep it I say. you got your Shaney's Spot and now Codi Corner. I love it. I wish I could see this though. ๐Ÿ™‚ I hope you get lots of responses. I doubt I will ever have a little space here but I love it that you do ๐Ÿ™‚ I enjoy all your post.

February 4, 2008
8:13 pm
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Hi taj! I sometimes want to save or share something I found on line. Or just say something and maybe connect on it. So here is my corner.
You are welcome to stop by any time!

๐Ÿ™‚

What was it you couldn't pull up, the video link?
Just go to http://www.youtube.com and type "it's a brain thing" into the search. The above is number seven pn that list of videos.
it talks about narcism, dependency and such. Topics we have covered here.

Taj, I think you can have the grandest spot of them all -- maybe you can call it "Taj's M'Hall"!
๐Ÿ˜€

February 6, 2008
12:15 am
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"Codi's Corner"- that's cute.

This was good. There's a link also to another video about sociopaths adn my mouth just dropped- the grown kids comes home from vacation and what he says to his parents is so horrible.

Check it out- I think it's called Diary of a Sociopath and it will show up after the one from this link plays.

free

February 7, 2008
3:51 pm
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Codi202
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"From the book 101 Lies Men Tell Women --and why women believe them."

By Dory Hollander, PH. D.

The first 21:

1. I'll call you.
2. I love you.
3. You're the only one.
4. I've never felt this way about anyone else.
5. I've got to work late at the office tonight.
6. That's the best sex I've ever had.
7. You've got the most beautiful eyes.
8. No, I'm not married.
9. Sorry. I must have left my wallet and credit cards at home.
10. You just have to believe me when I tell you nothing's wrong.
11. I'm ready to make a commitment.
12. Except for a beer or two, I never drink.
13. My wife and I haven't had sex in years.
14. We'll get married as soon as I...
15. I'll be home in twenty minutes.
16. it's not that I don't care -- I just have to spend more time with my kids.
17. I've only slept with maybe ten women in my entire life.
18. I've been celibate since we broke up.
19. I could never lie to you.
20. I can still last all night.
21. I always use a condom.

February 7, 2008
4:07 pm
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hi Codi, in your corner!! so true about the 21 postings above, hmmmmmm, makes you think twice about trusting men!

February 7, 2008
5:53 pm
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Thanks Camer!

And that's only 21 of the 101 on he list. I figured, let the shock of those sink in before adding the rest, lol.

Thank you too free, I will watch the video.

You know that the video I posted is only one in a searies of about 10 that the guy who did them posted under "its a brain thing".
Its a searies of lessons.
there is another set that I am trying to watch too.

I will try to post access here later as well, to make it easier to find.

February 8, 2008
11:22 am
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I am not a SOCIOPATH!!HA!
Why do you think i am?
Ok Bad joke. REALLY I'm not coming in to stir things up!

Codi.My oldest brother is a total sociopath..my other one borderline.
So it entails all the historic digging, and self searching to understand.
You gotta wonder what and how you pick things up.
That's no joke! and it is a painful journey.

Ok I did read the rest of this thread ( 101 Lies men tell)
Now where's the sister book?
101 Lies Women Tell?

hehe ;0)

February 8, 2008
11:35 am
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I did a quick search with the words "lies women tell men" and this is what it listed:

http://search.benefitbar.com/b.....n+-+Amazon

My guess is that there isn't much need for a book on the subject.
Or as much financial profit in selling one as in the other.

February 8, 2008
11:40 am
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"Self-searching" hmm I just caught that MsG. I don't think that sociopaths do a lot of that. They are not concerned with the harm they do to others, if you recall.

I am not calling them hopeless. I believe that the video said that something like 25 percent of are sociopaths (I need to watch it again, but right now I need to do the working up to...the previous videos.)
My guess is that if "they" ever do soul searching, it is if what is done is hurting them. If they feel for the other, they are then not in that catagory, Right?
(Again, I need to watch and read again to be certain.)

February 8, 2008
6:38 pm
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Yes.sociopaths don't care for others suffering, not anyone who is close or uninvolved.They are pure opportunists.
And they think the hungry,poor and beaten deserve their plight.

Me? I tend to seperate those who allow their plight, participate in their distruction, from actual victims.

To me there is a difference between the two when it comes to adults.

Ok. My brother is actually a Narcissistic sociopath. What a combo!
It's weird and hurts having a family member like that.

February 8, 2008
6:44 pm
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My brother seems to be a sociopath too. I haven't seen him in more than 16 years.

MsG. Your first paragraph is enlightening. More info than I have had as of yet, and it is opening my eyes.

Thanks MsG., for your posts.

I have much to study.

February 9, 2008
11:47 am
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WHAT THE H#@%?!?!?!?!?????

http://www.naturalnews.com/022465.html

"The Extremist Belief Commission".
What are we SUPPOSED to THINK about a title like that????

BTW,I am not offiliated with ANY political party, and for GOOD reason!
We need to think INDEPENDENTLY, and that takes intellegence and responsibility.

"Americans are so far removed from the roots of their liberty that they just don't get it. Most Americans don't know what habeas corpus is or why it is important to them. But they know what they want, and Jane Harman has given them a new way to settle scores and to advance their own interests."

So True!

February 9, 2008
5:01 pm
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"*Pain in the present is experienced as hurt.

*Pain in the past is remembered as anger.

*Pain in the future is perceived as anxiety.

**Unexpressed anger, redirected against yourself and held within, is called guilt.
**The depletion of energy that occurs when anger is redirected inward creates depression."

http://www.witi.com/growth/200.....lalive.php

February 11, 2008
9:02 am
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I am just adding this because i need to type before i get going.
I need to be where I need to be for who I am, not where others feel that I need to be.

So here are the next set from 101 Lies...

22. I can help you get a great job in my company (field).
23. I I haven't seen her since she and I broke up.
24. I tested HIV negative.
25. I haven't done drugs (smoked pot) since college.
26. The only sexual fantasies I have are about you.
27. No, I don't think your thighs (stomach, breasts, hips, etc.) are too big.
28. I'm too tired.
29. How could you think I'd be interested in her? She's your best friend.
30. When it comes to oral sex. I'm the best.
31 I've never had any trouble keping and erection before.
32. It's you and me babe -- we'll make love all over Europe.
33. I'd never do anything to hurt you.
34. I want to grow old with you.
35. Believe me, my wife and I live very separate lives.
36. Our having sex won't change a thing between us.
37. don't wrry, I've had a vasectomy.
38. I'm going to leave my wife.
39. You're nothing like my mother.
40. Your being a different religion doesn't matter to me.
41 It doesn't bother me that you make more money than I do.
42. Even without sex, we
d still be friends.
43. I think older women are the most exciting.
44. I'm considered one of the top people (in my field, in the company).
45. What attracts me to you is your mind.

February 11, 2008
11:59 am
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Yes, Depression is my problem also.

Codi.you and me are somewhat alike.
When we are in an emotional "bind", are somewhat overwhelmed with awfull things ( work, family, people, living situation, our clutter!, etc.) we tend to go deep, and search for answers. We face the ugly stuff, outside and in ourselves.

For me sometimes I overdo that..but I usually don't hide or let it prevent me from moving forward.
It gives me insight as to how to proceed, without ignorance .

Know thine enemy?
Always a good plan. Even if the enemy is within also.

;0)
Be Well!

February 11, 2008
3:21 pm
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Thank you for your kindness and wisdom, MsG.

I need to deal. I need to deal.
Instead I want someone to pick me up and take me where I need t go and be my spokespurson. I can't handle the manipulation anymore. Someone else wouldn't be so manipulated.

My heart is pounding.
i can do this, what I need to do. But the stress is keeping me in hiding.

One of the quotes i just got: It's what I seem to have become:_______________
"Life is always walking up to us and saying, "Come on in, the living's fine," and what do we do? Back off and take its picture."
Russell Baker

February 11, 2008
3:56 pm
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Yea Codi.Grab life by the G'nads and get in there for a tumble!
Don't be scared. Face that shitty job by saying "you're shitty and not worth my effort" well mainly the people and organization that saps you.just get the money, and use it to get ahead.
..focus on something else.Schooling, another employer.

Say ME me ME!! To Hell with anyone who is inconsiderate, or get's in your way. Look past them to the goal.
BUT.Codi! maybe you blew it where you are? I mean, all the stress has overwhelmed you, and you didn't find other options before you took time off, reacted in a way where you may loose pay, or even get fired?

Is it too late to go back there and just work, while you take care of getting out of that place?( in the background) Is it too late for damage control?

So is there damage control in order? Can you kiss the bosses buttcheeks ( even if it's phoney/ingenuine) to ride it out til your more secure. Ready for the move!

Can you find a can of freshener you LIKE, and spray it to your neighbours cubicle?hehe

Do you have employment insurance.or options?

Learning to keep your head, focus on the important things ( income, future prospects, keeping head above water on a domestic/personal front)
A step at a time Codi. Don't let others behaviour block you from achieving a better life.

Read Steven Covey's book.
the 7 Habits of Highly Effective People... He rights about ethical and humane methods of finding success.

Explore your options in regards to making work and life better.

You can do it!
And maybe moving to a state that has better policies and safety nets would be an option?
What have you got to lose?

Enter the building, go through the door to grab what is your right.

I hope this helps a bit.
:0)
Be Well

February 11, 2008
4:33 pm
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I couldn't do anything about the spray.
I am wondering if I needed to speak to a lawyer first.
My problem is I don't know what to do yet.
I am working on damage control right now. I don't want them to damage me any more.
I have been losing my cool for a while.
One time is when MR wonderful tried to see me for the last time.
I did not believe it was him.

I guess you would need to have experienced it.
I think damage control involves showing them the damage they have done.
and maybe what I am entitled to beyond unemployment insurance.
Or maybe it won't go that far.
Depends on What they do and what lawyer says.
Etc.

And what doctor says .
I am off to clinic.
thanks
(((MsG)))

gosh I can't even type. I am shaking so much.

February 11, 2008
8:30 pm
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Wow, MsG, I feel so different after seeing the doctor.

Really, the stress is so much less tonight.
I know that I get a lettle irrational when I am stressed. I don't know how to say what I am trying to say, you know?

Sorry if I stepped on your toes. I don't know if I did. I just know that the point I was trying to make may have been...

I don't know what I am trying to say.

((hugs))

February 11, 2008
10:08 pm
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((Codi))

It's ok.Why would I get hurt/insulted by you speaking your truth, or correcting my observation.
I don't get the feeling you are being dishonest or manipulative.
Codi.you said once to me that you needed to detach. You didn't insult me ( call me names, or label me) So you commented to me within the realm of recovery. Using the recovery guidelines in your own words. I don't hold grudges. I can accept opinions that differ from mine
I can handle people saying NO, and just being straight up.

I can seperate recovery talk from lashing out, and insults.

I don't know the full story about you.What i do get , from your posts is you feel threatened, abused, scared, frustration, even anger. You have been put into a position where you have to protect yourself.If this means getting medical documentation to make a company pay go for it!
Corporations and companies are getting away with tresting workers very bad, and creating bad work environments, so the more that fight that, the better.
Boy can I relate to the fear of lack of security ( being around 50 , and female, and alone) It's not like we have a lot of time to build security ( financial, residential, and emotional)
I am not alone but it's not like my life is set, and I have my nest egg in place. I do , in a way, but I have a hard time trusting.

It helps if people just let you speak YOUR truth, No matter who it is.

I see you struggling and trying to do the work to make life better. That deserves a lot of recognition and a pat on the back.

..and i can relate to being "irrational" too. Feeling embarrassed? Yup there too.Have had a very hard last few months. Xmas was ok, but January just hit the fan.

So what did the doctor say? ;o)

February 12, 2008
1:28 pm
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The doctor said that my symptoms come from overexposure to the sprays.
I am on meds. If the job can't keep me from being exposed to chemicals then I am off work this week.
I am off this week.
I have another appointment at the end of the week.
Its a workman's comp thing. So meds and treatment are covered. I had no idea.
Now lets see what happens.

Thanks MsG.

February 12, 2008
3:16 pm
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(((Codi)))

February 16, 2008
1:19 pm
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(((sininho))), thanks.
************************************
Okay, next tag of what I have been studying - I found this article on how to deal with the "N".
this is on the last page:
Conclusion
The best advice to someone whose life has been affected by narcissistic personality disorder is to GET OUT. Whatever it takes, GET OUT. If you think you are suffering or hurting now, it will only get worse. Narcissists cannot change. Here are some tips to help you leave.

- Dump the self-blame. Itโ€™s not your fault.
- Forget the guilt. You could never have saved him anyway.
- Cry your eyes out. Really let the tears flow. Itโ€™s cleansing and healing.
- Let him go. He was never worth it.
- Stand tall. You were the one who was too good for him.
- Smile. Inner peace will come sooner than you think.

You must come to the conclusion that, โ€œIt is NOT you.โ€ It never was, it isnโ€™t, and it never will be. For a narcissist, itโ€™s all about them, just as it always will be.

God Grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change
The courage to change the things I can
And the wisdom to know the difference

And, wouldn't you know it, I forgot to get the web address.

February 16, 2008
9:35 pm
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