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Chicky
April 3, 2006
6:58 pm
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chickyfighter
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September 24, 2010
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Hello everyone, I have not posted in quite some time but I was thinking of all of you and know you are in my prayers!

April 3, 2006
11:24 pm
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mamacinnamon
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September 27, 2010
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Hey chicky.....

How R ya? Hope things are goin well for you. Nice to see you again. 🙂

April 5, 2006
6:00 am
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revelation
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chickyfighter...how are you getting on hun?

April 8, 2006
8:14 pm
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chickyfighter
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Hi Mama C, and Rev, I have been well. I have learned much more about life, me and am in a better place.

I am much wiser each day and I a begining to put into action all my intellectual knowledge, and changing my thinking... so anyhow how are you?

Shall I read any thread in particular to catch up?
I am sorry I left, I needed time alone.
Mama C my ex had the nerve to try to cheat on his ex w/me and I almost fell for it b/c I guess in the back of my mind I wanted the father of my children to have their father f/t, but I was reminded of the reason why I divorced him.
My children are unfortunately the ones who end up the most hurt by his actions, but I cannot change who he is.

I am beginning to think he has a mental illness, bipolar.

He has crazy mood changes and I can recall he used to cheat on me and not even feel remorse, he'd turn it around on me, then he'd spend money we did not have and to the point he finally declared bakruptcy.

He has told the boys that he was coming back to them and then calls them the very next day and says he changed his mind but he loves them...He calls and emails saying he loves me and wished he had one more chance, But then he sends me another email saying he wishes I'd stop being bitter (I never even answer his emails b/c they are so inappropriate).
Then I want to diagnose him b/c that is the only rational way of making sense to his erratic moods, and his narcissistic ways w/the boys (me I don't even care about men are mean to women but to their own children???), maybe he is just cold and sick.

He even went as far as leaving his new wife to "prove to me " that he means what he says, and then goes back to her and calls me saying "I can't do this, I hope you understand I love you and her" and continues to hurt the boys by telling them stuff.

My oldest one has finally realized that he has issues and knows that he cannot be trusted.

I finally had to go and ask one of the pastors to pray for my son b/c I did not want the craziness of my ex to affect him like it did me at one point.

I have made the decision not to let him take the boys to his new home b/c he makes them sleep on the floor and on the couch while his step children sleep on their own beds in their own room...(the boys just told me this a couple days ago and did not even realize that it was wrong, they accepted whatever he throws at them).
He doesn't even realize that he is teaching them to accept any sort of treatment, and to not expect to be treated w/respect, love, and special attn.!
He makes me sick and I was told to love him and show him love like God loves us all...It is hard!
I have not spoken to him nor do I want to...all I can feel is feel pity, and I thank God that he did not come back b/c he is doing to her what he did to me for 10 yrs and I am so glad I learned and am out of his sick environment.

OK that was a mouthful.

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