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Chapter 10 Codependent No More
March 8, 2007
11:23 pm
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mj
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I will be celebrating my 50th this June. I definitely wouldn't want anyone calling the shots on my birthday. My daughters wanted to throw me a big Party and invite all my friends throughout my life. I didn't want to deal with the worry of having it perfect, cause that is how I am. Put on perfection so everyone knows that you have it all together. I didn't want to deal with the fact that I would die if no one showed up. I like that my adult daughters are coming for my birthday and that is gift enough for me. I gave myself a party my 29th birthday. I graduated from College with my degree the day before so I was celebrating both events. It was a disaster. I have never had another party since. Now that is fear!

March 8, 2007
11:23 pm
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mj
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Thats weird, I answered your question before you asked it.

March 8, 2007
11:25 pm
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ggfred4
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Well, I think my mom may have said, "We are thinking of coming next week for your birthday". Then my codependent self said, "Sure, we will be here." I am too old for this crap anyway. Then I will have to chose a restaurant knowing what everyone else's favorite choices are and not mine. When she called, I had no idea they were spending the night..found that out tonight...and my house is a mess, which is usually not me, but I have been struggling with my stamina since my surgery. My dad believes in spic and span organized households. He will be so disappointed in me when he sees my house. Normally, I would stay up and clean it, but I really don't have the energy.

March 8, 2007
11:25 pm
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mj
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My husband wants me to get a job and help out. He tells me we can't do this, we can't do that because, YOU are not contributing. Mind you that anything he wants, he gets. I don't think you would see him working for minimum wage.

March 8, 2007
11:26 pm
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ggfred4
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mj, I am turning 51 tomorrow...We are so close in age! What is your degree in? I am proud of you for finishing and sorry about your previous party...

March 8, 2007
11:27 pm
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mj
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🙂 I so relate with the codependent self....Sure, Yes, of course, no problem. ((((GG)))))

So may I ask how many candles was on your cake?

March 8, 2007
11:28 pm
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ggfred4
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I have to say I got a little irritated to hear your h state that you aren't contributing!!! Now I have always worked and never even got off more than 2 mos. when I had my babies. He expects me to work and is no hurry for me to retire...definitely no princess here!!!

March 8, 2007
11:29 pm
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mj
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Hey, we are so close in age! You are older!!!! My degree is in Art emphasis Photography. I opened a commercial Photo Studio the year prior to my graduation and had it for 5 years.

March 8, 2007
11:30 pm
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mj
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🙂 I like being a Princess and a Queen bee. You ought to try it. You might like it too!

March 8, 2007
11:32 pm
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ggfred4
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What a wonderful degree...you must be very creative...Okay, should I say thanks for pointing out that I am older...LOL!!!

March 8, 2007
11:33 pm
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mj
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I had always worked too until I met my husband #2. I had raised my daughters alone. Hubby 2 spoiled me financially. I liked it. I will never be the same again.

March 8, 2007
11:34 pm
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mj
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🙂 Yep, your welcome! You do have a cute sense of humor!!!! I promise no pizza on your birthday either!

March 8, 2007
11:35 pm
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ggfred4
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Honestly, not really the princess type...I have always wanted to be independent and not depend on anyone.

March 8, 2007
11:36 pm
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ggfred4
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ah, you remembered about the pizza!!!

March 8, 2007
11:38 pm
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mj
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I am so glad that you are feeling better from you surgery. Recovery is slow. When I broke my ankle I thought I would be an invalid forever. I really sympathized with you the day you hesitated asking your friend to bring you something to eat. I wanted to hop through the screen and rescue you from being famished. Now thats a true codependent. Illusionary and in Denial. I wouldn't be making any apologies to my parents for a MR Clean HOME. Its only understandable that you are working and rehabilitating back into full health. Yep, codependents feel others pain.

March 8, 2007
11:39 pm
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mj
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Glad you know what you like. Yes, you hate pizza. What is your favorite food? I will order you some up for your birthday?

March 8, 2007
11:40 pm
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ggfred4
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Boiled shrimp, hot, not cold...mmmm!!!

March 8, 2007
11:40 pm
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mj
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Well, Dear GG, I need to wander off and spend time with my hubby. Thanks for all you have done to create a life for yourself tonight. I appreciate your friendship and hope that you make it a Wonderful Birthday!!!!!!

March 8, 2007
11:41 pm
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mj
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Do you like butter and garlic or cocktail sauce?

March 8, 2007
11:41 pm
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ggfred4
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I need to hit the sack anyway...thanks for chatting mj...I appreciate your time and care....gg

March 8, 2007
11:43 pm
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ggfred4
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cocktail sauce, ketchup..or just plain...

ttyl my friend!!!

March 8, 2007
11:43 pm
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mj
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Have a Fun filled Birthday! Sweet dreams and happy thoughts and Lots of Boiled Shrimp! Thank you for sharing.

March 8, 2007
11:48 pm
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ggfred4
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thank you too!!! nite mj!!!

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