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Best friend drama(just need to vent)
November 16, 2004
9:01 am
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nikili
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I am about to move in with my BF temporaraly ( I am leaving my boyfriend). We are in our 30's but she was my undergrad roomate. So we know we can live together. Howevcer, I am leaving a controlling relationship and my BF tends to be ...a bit to handle. Ex. I live 20 away from her. I can go visit with her for 5 or 6 hours and as soon as i go to leave she asks me to stay. She is from a large family and just likes having people around her. A few years ago we had it out over this...and i explained that I am not emotionally responsible for her when she is upset because I leave. She has gotten better. BUT she has seem me go through so much with my boyfriend and wants me to leave desperately. I am wondering if I will be entering into another co dependent relationship knowingly. We love each other desperately, closer than sisters. I need to just be alone now but financially this means I would have to stay with my boyfriend longer. I plan on moving to my BF after Thanksgiving.

November 16, 2004
12:26 pm
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CAMER
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hi Nikili: trying to understand the post...so you now live with your BF and want to move out to live with your best friend?

November 17, 2004
10:10 am
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nikili
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I live with my botfriend and it is very bad. I am going to spend about a month with my girlfriend while I get my own place. I am just worried that when the time comes to leave my Best Friends house that she will not want me too or understsnd my need to be alone with myself for awhile. Thanks for asking.

November 18, 2004
12:26 pm
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CAMER
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Nikili: see that is part of codependency....saying "yes" to please others instead of NO to please yourself. If your friend truely knows and understands you she will respect your need to move out after a month, and yes, it is good to live "alone" and spend time alone and get to work on yourself more.

I wish you luck on living alone, and with your friend, and hope all goes well with yourself on taking a "break" from your bf.

((camer))

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