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Was that abuse even though I was 13? Explicit
December 9, 2011
2:54 am
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squigumm
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December 9, 2011
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I keep
wondering if I am over dramatic but if I write out the simple facts, it isn’t
okay.  A 27 year old man in the army,
drunk, took off my pants while I asked him what he was doing and he told me he
was going to eat me.  I did not know what
that was but he stuck his face in me and I tuned it out and turned my head to
watch the I love Lucy episode where Lucy eats all the chocolates.  He kissed me a lot. I felt like that was my
fault.

 

A 20
year old man sat down by me at the movie theater and tried to get me to go to
the bathroom with him to have sex.  I
didn’t know him, but I my friends all chose to sit somewhere else because the
theatre was so full. In the theatre he pushed his fingers in me, asked me if he
was in the right spot.  He made me touch
him.  I tuned out, I had help all around
me but I tuned out until he put his cum on my lips and I wiped it off while he
laughed. Then still waited until the movie was over to leave.  I felt like that was my fault.

 

An 18
year old forced me down in an alley and pushed his fingers in me but this time
I fought him back.  I think because he
was younger.

A 19
year old and his brother pushed me down behind their house and touched me and
kissed me while I resisted.  I ran away
from that one.

 

As I
write these I feel like I know they are not okay. But I still feel guilt. Like
it is my fault. But I am an adult now. So this shouldn't bother me now.

May 28, 2012
1:26 am
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ShiningLight
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February 9, 2011
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squigumm,

 

That's extremely sexual abuse. And to think you were just 13 years old that time. Have you already consulted a counselor?You might have tolerated some of your experiences in the past but still considered as sexual abuse especially that you were only 13. It might be traumatic for you in the future so you need a professional help. Talk to your parents about your condition and seek for their support.

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