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My friend was molested as a child. How can I help her?
December 20, 2011
9:22 pm
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Mellon
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December 20, 2011
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My best friend recently told me that she was molested by a family member when she was little. She has only told me, our other friend, her boyfriend, and her mother. She told her mother a little while after it stopped but hasn't talked to her about in years. Her mother believes her and has been very protective of her since but has not done anything legally. My other friend told me it was her uncle who did it to her over several year starting around age 5. I am very close with her family and when I heard which uncle it was that did this to her I was so shocked. He is the husband of her mothers closest sister. She is concerned that it may have happened to some of her cousins but she doesn't know if she wants to share what happened to her with the rest of her family because it would literally tear her family apart and I'm not sure that she could handle that. Her family is very close. She is beginning to feel ready to seek help from a counseler but isn't sure how to start a conversation with her mother about this again. I think she is also scared about her father or brothers finding out because they would not handle it well and would most likely beat the shit out of her uncle. I want to help her but I'm sure how to bring it up again or if I even should. Should I wait for her to bring it up to me? I don't want her to feel like I'm ignoring this issue but at the same time its still not something that she can easily talk about and I don't want it to be the only thing we talk about if thats not what she wants. I found a counseling center and gave her the info for it and have repeatedly told her that I love her and will support her no matter what. I'm at such a loss. I want her to be happy and healthy. I am so disgusted that someone would do this to her. I honeslty am having such a hard time processing it, especially when I found out who had done it to her. It makes me so angry and upset and I just want to make sure I am doing everything I can for her now that she feels brave enough to face this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

May 29, 2012
1:40 am
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ShiningLight
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February 9, 2011
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Mellon,

 

It might be best to submit her to a professional therapist/counselor so she can receive the proper treatment and advice. I guess your love and support is enough for her to be strong to recover from traumatic experiences in the past. It's already a great relief for her to have you as a true friend. You are just doing well. Just keep it up!

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