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Is this type of relationship worth hanging on to?
January 3, 2012
2:02 pm
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Jackie2012
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January 3, 2012
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I have been friends with this guy since 2001 and from that day we were always really good friends whether him or me was in a relationship with someone else. In the end of 2006 he ended up hooking up with an ex and they married and had a baby. Things between them ended in 2009 (he took it very hard and was suicidal) and then we became more close than we had ever...one thing led to another and we started doing everything together, from sleeping together to meeting each others friends and family. Since 2009 we spend EVERY single night with each other and go places together. We do everything that boyfriends and girlfriends do together, but we dont have the title.It's now 2012 and he still says he's not ready for a relationship and i'm assuming it's because he's not over his ex-wife (he has'nt said it but thats my assumption). The bigger problem that bothers us both is that we now as of July 2010, have a baby together! I have ALWAYS had problems with my ovaries and my doctor told me i was not producing ANY eggs, so we got careless and stopped using protection. We both couldn't believe i was pregnant and I hate that this has happened in this situation and we do not believe in abortion. I Love this man with all my heart and hope he is not just hanging in there tuff with me because we share a child. I dont want him to feel obligated to be here, but to be here because he Loves me. I want the reason he hangs around, to be because he knows in time our situation will progress into a real relationship. The problem is, should i be understanding as a friend should be and stick by his side until he is ready or should i back off? I've tried to end it and we both were sick to our stomachs without each other and he said it felt like a break up. I'm so weak and confusedCry...HELP!

May 30, 2012
5:24 am
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ShiningLight
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Jackie2012,

 

Sorry but that seems hard for you. Maybe it's just best for you to ask his assurance that he would still be responsible for your child (big chance he would). For the great friendship that you've had for years, I know it won't be easy for him to let you go and just let you hangin' in there. But forcing him to commit to you and love you that way you want it is not a good idea. For now, I think he's indeed not ready and he may be having a hard time now figuring things out. And you have a point, maybe he has not yet moved on. One good advice for now is just to be a friend to him and try your best to be with him during his tough times. Sometimes love can be learned. If you are really meant for each other then you'd be together soon. It's just not the right time. Give him space and time to think and figure things out on his way. If you love him, set him free and if in time he returns, then you know he's yours.

August 9, 2012
4:54 pm
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Curtis Baker
Canada
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You must talk to him for your relationship and demand a assurance from him s it will provide some relief to you mind and it will be also good for your future.

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