Avatar

Please consider registering
guest

sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register

Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search

— Forum Scope —




— Match —





— Forum Options —





Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters

sp_TopicIcon
world of hurt
November 6, 2001
3:58 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

i can't believe i'm still on the same subject i started months ago...

he hates me now. i told him he was lying at four points in our relationship. he denies all but one. he hates me! I love him!

I want him back. i believe him and he wasn't lying. what am i going to do?

yeah, i know i sound like a weak waffling wimp to some, but i need help.

November 6, 2001
4:04 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

i'm so screwed up. i realize that i;m frustrated with myself and have been taking it out on him. i've been finding ways to complain about him, when i was trying to relieve my own feelings. like he lives this life i want to live. i feel trapped in my job, and with bills. he works only a couple days a week, has no money, but is free. i want to get rid of my possessions and be free too, but i'm too spoiled to know how. he knows how. i hate myself. i hate my life. i want him back!

November 6, 2001
4:08 pm
Avatar
Molly
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

then accept it for what it is, if you want to. Get away from what you know is healthy, what you know you can trust, and just settle for what you get. Liars, have such a way to twist things, and know what your talking about even with the evidence in hand. Read that thread but I love him one more time. Read the book on Verbal Abuse, I think it was Deborah Tannin, she can show you how your brain gets so confused, and think pink is purple. Look at your gain, look at your cost, if you want to believe him, and want to love him, and agree to accept him for who and what he is then take a stand and do it. Were not going to judge you, and will most likely be here for you when you grow weary. Take a break from thinking about it. What did Paul M. say , ugh ugh let it be. At least for a while no sense driving your self nuts.

November 6, 2001
4:15 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Molly, your strength is good. Thank you.

Thank you for approving me to going to hell... because that's where i'm headed. No, nothing against you. What i'm saying about you is positive.

i'm digging my own grave. i hate myself. i want to kill the pain and regret. no, not me i won't kill me, just indulge in some things that will kill the pain.

November 6, 2001
6:20 pm
Avatar
Ladeska
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Artist 2....isn't it wonderful, the place we find ourselves in sometimes...the clearing in the forest where we fight it out. Just you and your shadow... You know the answers, you're just fighting it. You want so bad to belief untruths, but you know better....don't you?

Nasty little thing about knowledge. Is sooo damned convicting. Ignorance is bliss sometimes, isn't it?

You'll feel better when you give way toward the truth instead of toward the lies. The war you feel is because - you do know - the difference. But, do continue the fight. Is a good one. Been there, done that, sometimes it's necessary. Get all good and bloody, try like Hell to make those round pieces go in those little damned holes and beat yourself silly trying to MAKE them go there!!!! Go ahead, sweetheart...we're here for you when you need a bandaid. Let it rip!

November 6, 2001
6:50 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

really the only thing i actually can verify is the thing he acknowledges. Lad, i wish this were a place where i could go in person. i'd cry and moan and get everyone to feel sorry for me. you are sweet, so sweet for commenting. I love everyone here. i wish you were all here in my living room.

the only thing i know is that he could be telling the truth about lying. i'm so sad because i really really really loved him. i just didn't understand him, or what he was about.

here i am talking in the past tense, perhaps it's a good thing.

November 6, 2001
8:04 pm
Avatar
Molly
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Sweetie, I can't toss stones in the glass house I live in, know what I mean. I don't buy into his b.s. any more, but once and a while get twisted in the emotions, not that but I love him stuff, but how could he be like this. I jumped off the roller coaster almost two years ago, and volunteered to get back on, thought I was strong enough to keep my head straight and simply focus on me, my agenda, and try it on for a while, well surprise, I am human. The drama, the fantasy, the bull shit, just gets to you and it takes super human stregnth to overcome it. I can relate to the spoiled part, hell I could have and maybe should have left 15 minuets after I returned, and many times since, the scorpian is a scorpian, and they don't change. I am just not real excited, or motivated 60% of the time to rush out there work two jobs and live hand to mouth, when I have the car payment made, my dog, my space for at least 12 hours a day, and as long as I don't jump into the dance, I am ok, and tredging towards that big jump. I have a great deal of support through people like you and Ladeska, and Alena, and Ranmar, Cici, and gosh, could go on and on, who understand, and keep me focused just like we do for you, what would we do with out this site? I also have my sister, and a few other friends, like the one I met with on Sunday who said oh, so he is like a Venture Capitolist, right now yea......... I can take my time figure out, where when,and how, and try to do it with out to much comprimise, but our souls are at stake due to our humaness. I don't know how old you are or how much time you have invested, but you have been on these threads long enough to know, hear me KNOW that this is not love. Sure its possibly you, sure its possibly him, could be the both of you, but when you think about it, is this really the way you want to live?????????????????????? the thing that keeps me going is that I know this is not where I want to die, and that I know I am capable of just about anything I want to do, and that a man does not complete me , but could compliment me if he is the right one. What kind of compliment, is wondering if its truth or not? sure we may end up with just a circle of women that we hook up with for a movie or yoga, or art gallerie stuff, but hell its better than living with the constant self doubt. it will make you crazy. but there is nothing like someone saying you want to live in hell, well ok get a good tan, and when your done, let us know we are here. Instead of your living room, I think we need to pool together, and get a commune. What do ya think?

November 8, 2001
12:10 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Blondie, let's have tea sometime - OK?

November 8, 2001
1:09 pm
Avatar
artist
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Can I join you--make mine herbal, please. How's the creativity, 2?

November 8, 2001
1:43 pm
Avatar
artist 2
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi Artist,

The doors have opened. It's working great! How about you?

November 8, 2001
1:44 pm
Avatar
Ladeska
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

AHHHH....SWEET RELEASE!!!

November 8, 2001
2:16 pm
Avatar
artist
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Art wise--wonderful. I am entered in a craft bazaar the weekend after next and I am taking all next week off (with pay) to finish preparations. I get to do what I have always wanted--work full time at making what pleases me--at least for next week.
With Ladeska's and Molly's wise advice, I will be doing better with my relationship, too.
---and the truth shall set us all free!!
Artist:)

Forum Timezone: UTC -8

Most Users Ever Online: 247

Currently Online:
47 Guest(s)

Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)

Top Posters:

onedaythiswillpass: 1134

zarathustra: 562

StronginHim77: 453

free: 433

2013ways: 431

curious64: 408

Member Stats:

Guest Posters: 49

Members: 109291

Moderators: 5

Admins: 3

Forum Stats:

Groups: 8

Forums: 74

Topics: 38532

Posts: 714177

Newest Members:

hritsyaDazy, zapravkaprofi, pbyffDazy, rjhybkfDazy, dflbifDazy, LavrushkaDazy

Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0

Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2019 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer