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wish it was me
October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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so
angry sad hating life it's not fair lots of things are not fair i'm
so angry i wish it was me i hate him why doesn't anyone love me? i
messed up should have never left i should have followed my heart if
it killed me i hate my life i hate it i wish i were dead

October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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called samaritans they had to end the call. fuckers.

thank you for all
you did. you all were good people to me.

October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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not over it
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October 13, 2010
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Msrella

???? Please think
of the people who will hurt if you go. Stay with us awhile. Give it
some time. We love you here. This is new and fresh and painful but
it will get better.

October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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CAMER
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September 30, 2010
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mzrella.......(((hugs))) what is going on??? talk, vent, say
anything...........you've been on this site for a while, you know
you can talk here......

October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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darkeyes
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September 24, 2010
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mzrella...love your way!

October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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September 24, 2010
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(((MZRELLA)))

Don't end it. If
you are feeling like you need a change, then move out of your city
and go someplace that is friendlier and fits you better. I know we
have had this discussion before, but wouldn't you want to go see
the dolphins in the ocean before you die? Why not cash in all your
assets and go to South Padre Island and go on a dolphin
cruise.

Do some of the
things you have always wanted to do and never did. You have nothing
to loose if you are ending it anyway.

There are good
things in life, you just haven't had a chance to experience them
yet. So if this is how you feel, fuck it all and just run away to
someplace new and different.

I have always felt
that where you are is not a good fit for you. There is still much
ahead for you that is good and positive, please just keep going so
you can get to the good stuff.

Sending you love,
life and positive energy.

October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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October 13, 2010
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i am
sorry mzrella, i dont wish it on anyone but myself, i hope you dont
do it, but i understand if you do, just know that i will miss
reading your thoughts, they have made me feel better on my bad
days. i know you and i havent crossed threads before but i have
read what you have wrote before and i cherish your words. so is the
price of this life,, bad men end up happy and good people get
nightmares, i am sorry for everything you have ever been through, i
am sorry.

October 31, 2010
12:00 am
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sdesigns
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September 27, 2010
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(((((Ella)))))

Ditto what
Chelonia said.

I think you're in
a rut where you are, and you've always resisted trying something
new, breaking from the routine. Maybe now is the time to change
that.

sd

November 1, 2010
12:00 am
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not over it
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((((((Ella)))))))

November 1, 2010
12:00 am
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lollipop3
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September 29, 2010
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((((ella))))),

Thinking of you
and sending postive thoughts your way.

Always
remember...this too shall pass. Stay strong and be gentle with
yourself, ok?

Love,
Lolli

November 1, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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(((((Ella)))))

Just checking in
to see how you are doing. You are in my thoughts.

November 1, 2010
12:00 am
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Shaney
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September 30, 2010
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ella
~ ella ~ ella ~ ella ~ ella

I know how you
feel ella. Please try not to let grief and guilt kill what I know
is deep within you. I know that despair has a hold of you right
now, but you have been trying too hard for too long, for you to
just give up now. Your will to get better has been with you all
along, I'm hoping it's still there now. You will survive this - I
know you will. Please keep in mind, that you can never prevent what
you can't predict. We can contemplate all day long what we SHOULD
have done - and if different decisions would have brought about
different outcomes. But, in all reality, we can't take care of
everyone. We can only take care of ourselves - which is what you
were doing when you decided to end a very unhealthy relationship.
It wasn't selfish - it was survival. There should be no guilt in
that. But I know how you feel. I do. And I empathize - and wish I
could say or do something to take away these crushing feelings.
Please keep communicating - maybe we can help you through this.
(((((ella))))) Hugs to you.

November 1, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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Ella,
I'm worried sick about you. Please post an update, even if all you
are up to doing is to just bump up one of your threads so we know
you are OK.

November 1, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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i
hope you are still here ella, i hope you are ok.

November 2, 2010
12:00 am
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not over it
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((((((Ella)))))))

We are here
waiting when you are ready.

Olivia

November 2, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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((((Ella))))

Hoping you are
OK.

November 3, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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(((((Ella)))))

Thinking of you
today and hoping you are OK

November 4, 2010
12:00 am
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not over it
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((((ELLA))))

I am worried about
you. Please let us know you are ok

Olivia

November 4, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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Hi
Ella,

Just letting you
know you are still in my thoughts. Please post when you
can.

November 5, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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(((Ella)))

Hoping you are
someplace where you are getting the support you need and that is
why you haven't posted.

November 6, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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(((Ella)))

November 7, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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((((Ella))))

Still holding onto
the hope that you are seeking the help you need and just not able
to get to a computer yet.

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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chelonia mydas
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(((Ella)))

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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not over it
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(((((Ella)))))

November 12, 2010
12:00 am
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zarathustra
miami, florida
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see
you soon ella, hope your happy no matter what, thats all any of us
want

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