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why can't I sleep
September 16, 2005
12:42 am
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needsomepiece
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It is 12:37 where I am and I can not sleep it seems that I never can sleep anymore. I miss my husband sleeping next to me and I know that he is in a bed with another woman and it hurts so bad. Why do they fall out of love? Why are they unfaithful? my therapist says I'll never understand because I don't think the same way as they do I don't feel like going on anymore..what is the point?

September 16, 2005
12:45 am
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Randomwomen2
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September 29, 2010
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hunny there is always a better tomarrow. Things will get better in time it might be hard for you to see but you wiil find some peace. I hope you can get some sleep and start the new day like a new life try and change thingsn around the house take a walk some time and make it easey for you to keep your mind off of things its amazing what a change of scenery will do for ya

September 16, 2005
12:47 am
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needsomepiece
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random it's been 1 year since he left but really only 9 days since we haven't seen each other...he was cheating on her with me and I was allowing it for so long..I haven't had contact with him other than email today for 10 days and it really hurts. I don't know what to do I don't know life without him in my life. How does this happen? Nothing seems worth it anymore!

September 16, 2005
12:47 am
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Lass
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I am sorry, honey. I am in pain, too. And alone. And awake.

Time is our friend. And things can change and heal remarkably fast.. you might be surprised.

Focus on your own life. Do one thing you always meant to do.

Go to sleep with a teddy bear. I have, my whole life, and I'm 45.

September 16, 2005
12:50 am
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Lass
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Also--

There are such things as unworkable situations. Recognize this as one of those. It just wasn't gonna work out. How we begin a relationship says it all. If it's an illicit affair, it's already on a foundation of slick horseshit. I should know.

September 16, 2005
12:52 am
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needsomepiece
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I have a prayer shawl that was given to me at church and I sleep with it every night...it doesn't help nothing helps...I am losing the battle everyday to "get over" him. He is with someone else and he is in recovery I have spent the last 9 years with the drunk and she is the saint because she is with him in recovery...I feel like I don't even know him...he still blames our marriage not working on me. I would do anything to have my life back...Lass I am sorry that you are in pain also..I wish I could help but I don't even know how to help myself

September 16, 2005
12:54 am
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needsomepiece
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I think I need to clarify I was married to him he had an affair with her came back to me then went back to her and was still sleeping with me...until 10 days ago

September 16, 2005
12:58 am
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Lass
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You might try Alanon. Their big message is one of detachment for the alcoholics in our lives. It might really help. Recovery takes time. He hasn't been struck perfect overnight, sweetheart.

I have a girlfirend who is the rescuing angel, in a situation much like yours, and her life ain't no picnic, and he's no dreamboat. He's about killing her, and he doesn't have his drug and drink to take the edge off!

September 16, 2005
12:58 am
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cindle
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September 27, 2010
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needs...

I've been sleeping alone for the past two years since my ex left me for someone else. Some nights, its no problem. Other nights - like tonight - I have a hard time sleeping too. My girls have loaned me their teddy bears cause they know how lonely I get in bed. Someone sent me a plastic rosary with instructions for me to put it under my pillow. Some nights, I can only squeeze it and pray. I can sympathize with you and wish there were some great answers to give. The only answer, like everyone says, is time. And for me, prayer.

good luck, cindle

September 16, 2005
1:01 am
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needsomepiece
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thank you for all your kind words I have been going to al-anon for the last 5 months and it does help I just want my family back i just want peace......it hurts so bad that I feel like someone is stepping on my chest...everyone says time will heal but I just want him to come home and hold me.

September 16, 2005
1:14 am
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cindle
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I know - I miss the hugs and holding a lot too. It does get better. I'll be thinking about you.

Take care

September 16, 2005
3:47 pm
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Rasputin
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Hi Needsomepiece,

I am so sorry for the agony and separation you've been thru.

I would like to reassure you honey that being alone and happy is millions of times much healthier than living with unfaithful man. So, count yourself VERY LUCKY!!!

I would highly command you to purchase the book "Codependent no more" by Melody Beattie, and "The purpose driven life" by: Rick Warren. You need to nurture your spiritual life and get educated about coda relationship, so that you can get healthy and get over with your previous relationship.

Logon http://www.coda.org and find out the closest meetings in your area and start taking advantage of their free meetings. They also have online meetings. Just e-mail them and they will answer you soon.

Coming to this wonderful website was like icing on cake. It really finished off my healing process. I pray it will be as enriching to you as it is to me!

~Love, Ras~

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