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Where the afghan is needed......
October 27, 2006
1:36 pm
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lovinglife
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somebody needs to smack that SOB- and btw- it's only 3 DUI's in 10 yrs not the 4 in 10 I was hoping for...that 4th one, like I figured *just* dropped of his record.

October 27, 2006
1:41 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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Your worth to me GG, is my opinion NOT YOURS. And to me it is worth listening to EVERYTHING that you have to say. I don't care if you stubbed your toe when you were 12, and your mom didn't handle it the way you thought that she should. I will listen, that is why I am here. Your pain is pain, and my love is unconditional. I will listen and love you no matter what. Your issues are important to me. Look at how everyone thought that what I told the other night was no big deal. It was a huge deal to me. But I feel better because it is out. I know what it is like to be a people pleaser. I have been doing it and still do, for 30 years. I truly struggle with being loved because I don't think that I am worth it. Ask my husband. He would tell you that every part of that statement is true. The harder he tries to love me, which is what I so desperately want, the harder I push him away. I don't know how to be loved. I understand a lot better than you think I do. What I hope you do know is that I love you, I am here for you and I am willing to listen to every word you ahve to say, and it does matter to me. I DO CARE.

October 27, 2006
1:43 pm
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cyndra820
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LL,

Here's where working for the DMV comes in handy!!!

NOTHING ever drops off your driving record. It may not go from state to state, but THANKS to the National Driver Registry it is accessible.

So, IF the prosecutor does due dillgence (I love legalese!!) he should get a copy of his driving record then run the info through NDR and see if he's ever had any other convictions. That will give him ammo for a tougher sentence.

I'm kicking myself a little. I may have been to hard on ArmyAngel, but darn it, her h said some mean things to her!!! I don't want her to do anything she isn't ready to do, but I want her to not kick herself when he is mean to her. Gosh, is that a horrible sentence or what!! LOL

Okay, I'm going to lunch now. I'll check on all of you later.

Love,
Cyndra

October 27, 2006
1:52 pm
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ggfred4
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LL,I wanted you to know that my thoughts are with you today and that I am not just thinking of me...I am following everything you are writing and when I feel better, I can come and whip ex's ass for causing you problems and still going to whip yours if you don't get to a meeting!!! Just don't have it in me today...okay, love you...(((((LL)))))

October 27, 2006
2:01 pm
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StronginHim77
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I know a guy who just got hit with a DUI in New Jersey. Florida got wind of it and because he has two prior DUI's (1 - ten years ago and 1 - eight years ago), they just suspended his license for TEN YEARS in the State of Florida where he lives. Plus, he is facing jail time in New Jersey because they got his Florida records and are prosecuting him as a 3 time DUI offender.

So, he is probably going to get a whole lot more than another slap on the wrist or some cute, community service hours.

October 27, 2006
3:17 pm
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lovinglife
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Okey-dokey….I took a nice long wonderfully smelling bubblebath- felt good : ) Going to lay down here (for sure) in about an hour- once my youngest heads off to work.

Cyndra~ I’m hoping somewhere down the line something clicks for someone. I mentioned in a previous post that his DUI’s all have been in different counties- now I know regardless if they have- he still has his record- but it means then that he is not going back to the same court, in front of the same judge and the same prosecutor. Would think if so that it would possibly spark someone to say… “Hey, this menace has been in our court-room before, in our county risking the lives of our people…and he’s back in here for his 6th time ???” We’ll see what happens; he just may get that 4th after all before his court date which I would imagine is like in a month or so. Past history is that he continues to drink until the court date. With his attitude right now- he's feeling pretty confident.

I made a kinda oops above with I said *fricken ironic* about the purple afghan the girls also have at work- I was sobbing and thinking more like – “and here I am too wrapping myself up in a purple afghan…” Thank god for purple (and green) afghans : )

Real quick about why I’m not familiar with the *skills programming* at work: They just started it within the last year- and only an initial select group went through training. Now the rest of us are being trained in it also. However for me- it might take longer to learn because when I started having *problems* over my recent heartbreak- I did like I always do- tried to cut myself off from the world and requested nightshifts (where there are only a handful of co-workers and everyone is sleeping) and gosh if there weren’t a few who had no problem switching shifts with me!! Now I’m known by my co-workers and supervisor as the person who loves doing those overnights : )

GG~ you bring up a good point – have any of us really taken care of ourselves?? We’ve had to be strong, tough for those around us- and now that we are trying to heal our wounds, we feel selfish that we just might need a shoulder to cry on, might need to be heard, might need to be hugged/held like so many times before … “Wait, forget it, I’m being selfish here…I’m sorry…gosh I wished that I wouldn’t have talked about my problems when so and so was having a problem…now I feel guilty…” and push the very people who truly care about us away. We can’t do that in here… as with each one of our trials/triumphs it’s going to help the next learn from it…also Ma Strong said something on one of the threads about…when we help others- we help ourselves-there is so much truth to that. So yeah, sometimes we are going to be the one in need of support (we might be in real tough shape if its ALL of us at once- : ) but we’ll manage), but the others times when those of us who are feeling strong in our moments/days/weeks – will be there for the others who need it.

Ok another thought I had last night and maybe I covered it already but if not, anything in here is worth repeating, right?! …but we are not here because we are *healthy* today and our lives are not without crisis- we all were brought together for a reason – let’s not forget that, K? We are here to get healthy- we are here to learn to get through *crisis’s* and we are here to be there for each other so one day we all will be healthy!! And THEN we can start a thread- where we're kicking back drinking our diet soda's just chatting about life maybe once or twice a week - and handing our purple and green afghan to any new comers to AAC.

Now Ms Michigan…I want to know how you are doing?! You and Cyndra have been holding the thread all together here these last few days…

October 27, 2006
3:33 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I am breathing...thanks for asking

October 27, 2006
3:34 pm
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lovinglife
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breathing now what is that suppose to mean?!

October 27, 2006
3:35 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I am still alive, thanks for asking

October 27, 2006
3:38 pm
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lovinglife
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oh Mich- you are such a beautiful person whether you realize it or not.

October 27, 2006
3:41 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I believe that you think so. I am sorry that I am not very talkative. I am talking to PO'd onthe phone, and I was talking to mama on my thread that I started to her. It is ok. I will be fine...I will be ok.

October 27, 2006
3:43 pm
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lovinglife
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I saw that you started a thread to mamaC- awesome now that is the way to take care of ourselves when we feel we need to.

When I mentioned that we might be in big trouble if all of us go down at the same time that it might be tough -but we'll manage- that is exactly what I was thinking...

We truly do have something pretty special here...

October 27, 2006
3:44 pm
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lovinglife
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No problem Mich I'm getting ready to take a short nap- working the overnight to night. Thank you for starting this thread...

October 27, 2006
3:44 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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You guys mean the world to me. You are all VERY special in so many ways that I cannot explain it. Are you still going over to libs at all right now?

October 27, 2006
3:48 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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LL,
If I posted something on libs, would you read it..? I just think too many people read things over here, which is fine, but if I can limit it I will. But you talked about where you were a year ago, and I have a letter that I wrote to my husband almost a year ago, that explains where I was then, and really where I still am now. In a fair amount of detail..

October 27, 2006
3:49 pm
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lovinglife
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I have check in to the thread I was posting on and do I wish that I had the mental engery to get in on it...but it looks like free is handling pretty good!

October 27, 2006
3:50 pm
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lovinglife
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yes mich I would read it...

October 27, 2006
3:51 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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We cross posted earlier. Don't feel obligated, it was just a question...if you would rather stay away form there right now, that is fine. I don't want to make things any worse for you than they are right now. That would not be my intent. Go take your nap, I love you.

October 27, 2006
3:52 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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cross posted again...I will post it in libs addressed to you, and when and if you want to read it you can...otherwise, don't worry about it.

October 27, 2006
3:55 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I put it over there, you can read it if you want...it is kind of long, but that will give you a good idea of where i was a year ago, and haven't moved far from there,

October 27, 2006
3:56 pm
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needtoheal
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girls... can I use the afghan for a little while tonight? I have to work -- keep myself busy while the kids are with their dad for the weekend...
I know that I will not contact the EX-b/f ... but I might feel lonely later after work.. So if it is alright I will check back later... Meanwhile, I will have you all in my thoughts while at work... and I do know that I am never alone....

love,
need

October 27, 2006
3:58 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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That afghan is a community afghan, we share here. Love to you. If you are lonely, jump on here and talk to us if you can

October 27, 2006
4:06 pm
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lovinglife
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life is ok for me at the moment..."it too shall pass" ...sometimes regardless of how much one has grown, how much one can be optimistic, how much the glass looks half full and not half empty...life can still kick ya down.

had I not had this site, had I not had our threads in the last few weeks, (really the meeting of you, Cyndra, and getting to know GG better)... life would not be good for me at the moment. I've really grown here and continue to...and Oh and through these last few days - I have not logged onto AOL!!! Where I want to run when I feel like shit about myself or my life.

I'll head over to libs and read once my head clears, after a nap : ) ... always does the trick. Just want to *be there in mind* for you. I'll check back and hopefully have a reply before I had out to work tonight - if not, be here in the a.m : )

October 27, 2006
4:12 pm
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on my way
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You all are so sweet. And so good and kind to each other. Mich I agree this is a terrific title for a thread!

gg...hang in there sweetheart.

hugs to all of you.

October 27, 2006
4:15 pm
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needtoheal
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thanks scared for offering to share the afghan with me later on tonight...

I am so glad that I have met all of you----scared, GG, LL, and Cyndra..

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