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Where is lovesickpuppie?
March 30, 2004
10:43 am
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lovesickpuppie
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yeh it was great it still feels great i kinda love karate now 😀 and i put it to good use 2day. its given me soooooo much confidence and ive only been once. im not one of those people who will fight but my bros mate was calling me yellow giant ( im blonde and very tall ) so i got his arm and twisted it and now him and all his other mates have shut up yay.

i get 2 lessons a week once monday and once wednesday and i have a grading on 18 april on a thing called la carta not gonna do very well in this grading but its not too hard.

April 2, 2004
11:10 am
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lovesickpuppie
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had a really bad day 2day. dan said he wanted to tell me summin in skool but he knew id go into depression if he did so he didnt tell me last night on msn i asked wat it was and he told me that emma said she loved him. he said that he told her he loved her and then obviously she said it back. im rather sad now. if shes lying to upset me or him then ill be very angry at her but i think she really means it i really need somone to talk to help me

April 2, 2004
12:57 pm
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Juanita
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Lovesick.... You knew they were seeing one another & liked one another. Doesn't make it any easier though. Try to remember though, the way she was kinda playing head games with you... Best to let them be. The future is still unsure, and you have a lot of future left to enjoy. Concentrate on your karate and other things you like to do. Remember too, you need to practice your karate on your days off from class. Try to put your mind in an "Emma-free" Zone. You've been so happy with karate, gained confidence, and stopped a mate from picking on you - re-read that note. You've stumbled into the Emma Zone for a moment, you don't have to stay there. "been there, done that..." Get back on track and move on. Don't worry about the things you can't change. You have enough to do already! As far as your mate, Dan, ask him not to talk about Emma to you if it bothers you so - or at least to wait a while before doing so! I would think that out of commonsense he would have thought of your feelings anyway.

Practice your karate... have fun... get into the "free" zone.

Have you talked to the other girls who you think like you lately??? You never know........ 🙂 A tall, blonde, karate-practicing guy?? hmm, hmm, hmm ..... Go check it out.

April 2, 2004
2:33 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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humm....i knew they liked each other like that but emma never says love. and i wanna practice karate but i cant do it at home cos its too small and i cant go out cos my bike is busted so thats that escape door gone! i guess ill just have to learn to cope if it makes emma and dan happy then thats a good thing. i jus cant imagine not being with emma

April 2, 2004
11:01 pm
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Juanita
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Bide your time.... if is meant to be it will be. Let things take their natural course. Give it 6 months or so. All of my highschool romances lasted about 6 months until we found out we weren't right for one another. Quite honestly, we all "loved" one another too. Everything is very passionate at your age. I remember falling in love within a week! Felt I couldn't live without them! (yeah, right... I'm not with those guys anymore) There were several guys I fell in love with just by looking at them & they never gave me a second glance. That's what teenagers do - drive one another crazy!

Now, my relationship with my husband, when we first started dating, began different than all my other relationships. Maybe that is why it worked and lasted. We became good friends early on. I refused to go steady with my man in the beginning, yet this was something I readily jumped at with the other guys. Don't know why, just wanted to start off slower with him. Seems to have worked too - dated 5 yrs, married going on 15....

Can you practice you karate outside? Where does your brother go? Do you have a basement, porch, or maybe a park nearby? Keep plugging away. All things worthwhile are worth the struggle to obtain/achieve them.

Be well!

April 3, 2004
11:14 am
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lovesickpuppie
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theres a park near me but its quite a walk and my pedal bike is broken. i went fishing earlier and had this sense of being alone and scared ( i dont know what i was scared of tho ). and im just getting very bored of life

April 3, 2004
11:29 pm
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Juanita
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I agree with Twinks. Try to talk to your parents. You don't mention much about them... how is your relationship with them?? What prevents you from feeling comfortable enough to talk with them?

My angle on how I felt when I felt alone & scared ... I think that this is the realization it is a big world in which we live, we are growing up, & there is so much to do and learn. I used to feel bored because I wanted to "stretch my wings". Could these possibly echo your thoughts & feelings?

Hang in there. By the way... you went fishing? How warm it is there? I'M FREEZING!!!!! (Did you catch any fish?)

Say..... have you chatted with those girls who like you yet??? Nothing like a little appreciation, flirtation and friendship to bring a smile around...

April 4, 2004
10:29 am
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lovesickpuppie
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well ive bin putting on a happy act to emma and dan and my familly. see i dont want my sadness getting in the way of emma and dan getting 2gether. and id be embarrased to tlk to my familly theres only about 3 people who really know how i feel and all of you ofcourse. and it was freezing cold and we didnt catch anything. and im bored of life cos all i feel is hurtful. i need a way out

April 5, 2004
3:56 am
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heh got drunk last night and it worked i was happy atlast. im numb now though. i cant feel any emotions no love no hate no happiness and no sadness.

April 5, 2004
8:48 am
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Juanita
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Lovesick-

Getting drunk is NOT the answer! Especially at your age. You don't realize what a monster you are flirting with when you drink. You will not be able to remain in control. You could hurt somone innocent. Please, don't do this. I suggest maybe talking with a counsellor at school. There is inner strength when admitting you need help. Nothing wrong with it. Everyone needs some help sooner or later.

Drinking is not the way. I have lost 2 HS classmates, one cousin, and a good friend of the family to people who drink & drive.... Don't set yourself up for a major fall!

Go back to karate - take your frustrations out there. It's a healthier way for you to cope. You need to enable yourself to deal with life's ups and downs in a positive way. I try to view everything as a lesson, learn something, and move on.

Be well. I'm hoping the best for you.

April 5, 2004
12:44 pm
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but it really worked im kinda happyish now. kinda numb tho cant really feel any emotions. but its better than being sad. i wont drink all the time plus i wont be able to cos i cant get the drink. but now im talking to dan online and hapiness is hurridly fading. guess ill cope tho

April 5, 2004
1:00 pm
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Juanita
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Wellllll, sorry to ask, but if it bothers you so much to talk with Dan, maybe you should lay low for a while & chill. Why cause yourself depression? If you are happier keeping away from Dan because of the situation, well, one has to respect that.

April 5, 2004
4:40 pm
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well i never thought of that.i just dont want to tell emma and dan how i really feel cos if it stopped them going out id feel worse. we sumtimes go out to a shopping place to mess about dans arranged it all but emas going so i dont know wether to go or not cos if he asked her out every1 would look at me and id have to pretend im happy when im not and it all just gets messed up

April 8, 2004
11:03 pm
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Juanita
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How have you been? Sorry, missed writing you over the w/e. Honestly, if seeing them together bums you out so much, try to keep your distance for your own happiness. You don't have to tell Dan why, exactly. Just say you'd feel like the third wheel, odd man out... Do you have other mates to hang with? Gone to karate again? If karate is not working out into your schedule due to your bike... how about some other type of physical fitness program such as jogging or weight lifting? Could perhaps get a set of basic free weights and keep them under your bed at home. They wouldn't take up much room. Just a couple ideas. Hope all is well for you...

Juanita

April 9, 2004
5:11 am
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lovesickpuppie
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no karate is working out fine its just that i dont have anywhere to practice inbetween my lessons. and i think you`re right about staying away from dan cos all he does is blame me saying that im ruiniing his chances with emma and stuff like that. emmas ok she dont say anything that hurts me its just dan.but i found out that emma too suffers from depression so now maybe i can help her out and she can help me and we`ll be closer freinds.

April 10, 2004
4:21 am
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i talk to emma alot we have MSN messenger so we talk every night and in school. maybe you`re right about dan he can be abit nasty sometimes. i have tried going through the moves in my head so i guess you`re right.

and happy easter all !

April 11, 2004
6:58 am
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lovesickpuppie
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yeh i guess i just have to wait and see how things go. im having a good day 2day as its easter and lots of choclate so its making me happy and its sunny and im having a bon-fire later. so 2day should be good. i think i just have to sit down and watch what happens really.

April 11, 2004
9:17 pm
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Juanita
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Happy Easter Pup! Hope you are enjoying your day. Save some chocolate for tomorrow! (lol)

April 12, 2004
7:18 am
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lovesickpuppie
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thanks both of you.

i also like a bonfire it makes me happier so does destruction of any sort!

and i am having a reasonably good day hope you all are too. eating sweets always cheers me up so easter will be a good time for me! a nice sunny day loads of choclate great music and i might even go over the country park later and chill out.

hope you all have a great easter and my newest quote taken from a shirt " make sure what you`re doing makes you happy ! " 🙂

April 12, 2004
11:23 am
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Hi Puppie, I'm NancyW. I love your new quote "do what makes you happy". I read a couple of days ago that you got drunk and 'thought' that made you happy. Please take it from someone with a LOT of experience with using drinking to feel better. It'll bite you in the butt after awhile!! It messes up lives, big time! Stick with chocolate, bonfires, karate and talking with people who care about you, like us and your parents. You don't have to think what everyone tells you to think. Know that you are a good, deserving person with a great future ahead of you. It's what you make of it. I was at a bonfire the other night and had such a great time. I laughed so hard, someone thought I blew birthday cake out my nose!!! Isn't that an image in your head?!

April 12, 2004
12:53 pm
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Juanita
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Must confess, I love nursing a good campfire... makes me want to bake some potatoes in the coals, roast weinies on the top & have s'mores for dessert! Keeps the feet, hands, & tush warm too!

April 12, 2004
2:19 pm
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lovesickpuppie
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i freind has made me realise one reason why i may feel depressed. cos i feel worthless i think i leed a pointless life. im a waste of time really ! if i can stop thinking like this maybe ill cheer up.

and i think we like destruction cos it releives anger

April 12, 2004
7:45 pm
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Puppie, Each time you catch yourself thinking you're worthless, say to yourself, "Oops, I mean I'm worthy!" Right now, you might not realize what you're worth, but some day you will. I'll bet that if you think hard enough you could come up with at least 1 thing you've done to make someone feel better about themselves. That right there makes you worthy!!!

April 12, 2004
8:00 pm
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Puppie, Each time you catch yourself thinking you're worthless, say to yourself, "Oops, I mean I'm worthy!" Right now, you might not realize what you're worth, but some day you will. I'll bet that if you think hard enough you could come up with at least 1 thing you've done to make someone feel better about themselves. That right there makes you worthy!!!

April 12, 2004
10:26 pm
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Juanita
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Aw Pup.... give yourself a well deserved break. Those masterpieces you see hanging on the musuem walls all started with a child growing into an adult, mastering pencil, pen, paper, paint and canvas. Sculptures come from lumps of clay - having to be molded and manipulated. Every humanbeing is a work of art unto themself. No one will ever be same as you Puppy. You will not be exactly like someone else. You have your own beauty and worth. The fact alone that you care about other people, and not just yourself, is worthy a thousand times over. If anyone tells you any different, tell them to go bug off.

You are a work in process, worthy of time and attention too. Be true to yourself. Do your best in whatever you do & you will not only shine thru... you can be proud.

Remember this - everyone is worthy! We all contribute to this life. We all affect one another. Who is more important? The surgeon, entertainer, farmer, teacher, or garbage collector? hmmm. They are all important in different ways... all decent, respectable, worthy professions. Just wish the pay scales weren't so drastically different! (lol - can't fix everything)

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