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whatta vacation
November 1, 2001
11:33 pm
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shugarmagnolya
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September 27, 2010
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im in the process of overcoming my depression/anxiety/bipolar stuff. I've been having a long distance relationship and the past weekend I went to his sisters wedding. It was just so nice.

When me and my boyfriend were together, i had so many "problems". I was so depressed and unhappy, searching frantically to find out what was wrong with me. I'm finally feeling better. stable. Good enough to get a job (i had a hard time keeping them before). The thing is when I told him how much i was feeling better and my plans for the future, he looked at me as if he didnt believe that i was okay.

I dont blame him, ive come to him so many times where i felt like i was feeling better and slipped back into a major depression. But this time i know im getting better without the slightest doubt in my mind. I feel like i have to prove that i am a capable person to my boyfriend now. but i cant help but feeling that he is not being supportive of me. It's almost like im nervous because he is watching me like a hawk. I'm afraid if im legitimately sad one day that he is going to mistake that for one of my crazy spells. Oh how much work i have cut out for me...

November 2, 2001
12:23 pm
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Molly
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September 30, 2010
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Sometimes we go into that little girl state, where we want validation and approval from others. don't go there with this, if this is the case. this is all about you, for you, and to heck with them if they can't take one of your bad days. Heck they all get to have them once and a while don't they? You don't have to prove anything to anybody, but YOU. How would he like it if he was under a microscope 24/7? don't put your self in that state of mind. Perhaps you need to borrow Artists2 chicken suit, and really make him wonder!!!!! Chill girl, one foot in front of the other, and if you trip, don't look to see who is watching, usually no one is. Its all in our heads, and if it isn't who needs that kind of friends, far less boy friends in our life, to validate them selves, by how many times we fall down?

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