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what to do for now
April 12, 2000
2:18 pm
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halfpint
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I am a twenty-year-old college student. I would normally describe myself as easy-going, caring and fun. Lately my mood and personality has changed. I find myself becoming extremely upset and angry over trivial things. I have had episodes where I have broken down to sobs for no reason or thrown things. I have hit my head on things, punched things. I am consumed by sadness or other emotions for about 60% of my day. I feel horrible, I can’t sleep, and I am always tired. Nothing else in my life has changed though. Although I have not thought of actually taking my own life I will sometimes picture myself after having slit my wrists and imagine who would find my body. I know that I have to talk to someone but I have to wait until I get out of school at the end of May. Any suggestions until then?

April 12, 2000
3:05 pm
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cerry
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Hi Halfpint,

I have heard those words from alot of others in the same vote that you are including myself. I know it must be difficult for you at this time. You sound very unhappy. I too was like that but I did go see someone in the end. If anything, talk to a counsellor or a friend. Do you have anyone you can speak with? It seems that lately you have had this mood change. Can you think of anything that would make you feel that way or has something recently happened in your life to make you feel that way. Don't give up Halfpint, your letter tell us all that you have a problem and would like help. We are hear to listen and give you our advise if you choose to take it. It is up to you. You are young, and too young to throw it all away. In the mean time I would suggest seeing someone about how you are feeling. Your emotional state can cause you difficulty in your studies as well as your sleep pattern. I know you would prefer to wait until school is over but are you not worth it.
If you want to talk, you have alot of friends who may help you and listening.
Take care
Cerry

April 12, 2000
6:06 pm
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janes
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Doesn't your school have counselors?

Find out...or maybe the chaplin?

April 12, 2000
9:18 pm
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chris-tina
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I was in exactly the same place as you describe at the begining of this school year. My best friend saved my life when she insisted that I see a counselor. I don't know where you go to school, but both colleges I have attended offer free appointments with counselors through health services. Look into it! I didn't realize they were there until my friend handed me the phone number. Don't wait!!! I have the same kinds of suicidal thoughts that you do. I wouldn't be alive right now if it weren't for my therapists! In the meantime, this is a wonderful place to talk. We are all here to listen. Take care of yourself halfpint!

-chris-tina

April 12, 2000
11:05 pm
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halfpint
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I only posted this thread earlier today and already I am feeling a little relieved. I have many wonderful friends as well as an amazing family and boyfriend. They do listen to me but don't understand. They are so protective of my feelings that they just tell me I will be fine or this will pass. Talking to people who understand is very reassuring. I also found the number to my on campus counseling center and plan on calling them tomorrow. Thank you everyone, for your support.

April 13, 2000
7:56 am
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hazza
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Hi Halfpint.
Have you had a full medical check up lately?
there are many conditions that can cause these mood alterations, and if you feel that it is all of a sudden out of the blue, then it is worth going to the doctor and getting blood checks done for a few things too.
check it has nothing to do with hormonal changes, thyroid, check if you have being eating anything different lately and so on. just make sure that there is nothing organic going on there.
the first part to any of this is to try to find out what is going on, if not physical then maybe its emotional. you will have to dig deep to see if anything is worrying you lately, what has upset you, maybe something is happening in your life now that you are not happy with deep down? maybe something is going on that has triggered feelings of past pain that you may be supressing?
it may jsut be a case that you brain chemistry has gotton out of balance. but do see a doctor about this first, if you feel that is has no reason to be happening emotionally, it makes good sense to check out that it is nothing physical first, if that is all clear, then you need to dig deeper into your emotional life to find out whats happening. a Councellor can help you with that.
Peace
Hazza

April 13, 2000
8:06 am
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cerry
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Dear Halfpint,

Boy, do those words sound familiar when you say that your friends do listen and don't understand as well as it will pass. In away they don't understand but it is there way of supporting you and trying to make feel better. They don't know what to do or help you because they don't how to. Just keep on communicating, someone will understand and eventually you will understand why you feel this way. Let us know how it goes with the counsellor. Just remember there is always someone to talk to. Don't give up. Have a good day. Take care
Cerry

April 13, 2000
4:38 pm
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halfpint
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I have made an appointment for late next week to see a counceler at my school. Thank you for all your words of encouragement. I will let everyone know how it turns out. Until then I'm trying my best to keep my head up.

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