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WHAT THE F$#@ JUST HAPPEND!! :)
November 21, 2006
9:49 pm
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santino
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What the F&^% happend 2 my thread??!!! 🙂 One minute my gal Taj64 (no worries love, i didn't take it hard at all 🙂 ) is arguing with double, the next minute someone is telling me to kill myself 🙂 Wow, look what I missed and I just went out for the afternoon. You people were busy,lol. I haven't even finished reading the rest of the messages on my "get over it already" thread. I'll see you later for I have 2 read the rest of it, who knows, someone may maybe telling me to sleep with my mother or something,lol 🙂

November 21, 2006
10:42 pm
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Randomwomen2
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(((Santino))))

November 21, 2006
10:53 pm
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free
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i went and read the thread. It's kinda scary. I thought about repsponding to doubledillemma but I'm not sure what to say. The posts are pretty bizzarre.

Definitely do NOT take those posts seriously. something's just very wrong.

free

November 21, 2006
11:44 pm
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LA Rosa
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To understand what is wrong more clearly...doubledilemma is asking for help on the thread...

I am worried my despair and I cannot cope anymore.

La Rosa

November 22, 2006
8:40 am
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taj64
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Good morning Santino. Im so sorry, I feel like I started that awful thread - I had no idea. I started handing out my usual advice to people who go through breakups. I am expert at having recovered from a big heartbreak though I am not fully recovered but I have come a long way. I questioned whether to post to Double (the double D) after I tried a response but I feel I would only say the wrong thing and I really do not know what to say. It is bizarre responses. It is on the extreme side of a person who is addicted to another person. (I have been reading some book on love addiction). And I know what it is like to become very attached to a person. It is not really the person that you love, it is the idea of the person you love, what you think they can give you. I have been reading some pretty amazing yet very harsh reality of love addiction. It is probably one of the most agonizing experiences a person can go through once you get addicted to a person sort of like a drug addiction. I can see the dilemma with Double D. I can only think that she will get through this very rough time even if it has been a long time. So back to you, I think you are going to do great, you have positive attitude and really all that you need is more time.A few years from now, this will be completely behind you. Im hoping this man who took over my mind will also disappear. It will, like the law of relativity holds true. use your own inner gut feelings on what is right for you as far as advice. Live life for today and as the guy in Titanic says, Make each day Count! And don't sleep with your mother.

November 22, 2006
9:16 am
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lovetocrochet
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*shyly raising hand in the back of the classroom*

Taj... for what it's worth I read through that thread and I don't think you did anything wrong. You gave good advice... okay so maybe ignoring the scary posts might have been better but I also understand wanting to stand up for yourself too. I probably would have responded very similar for what it's worth. So please don't be hard on yourself, I think you did fine.

November 22, 2006
9:22 am
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soprano2
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Santino--
I am glad that I stopped to read your thread. I told myself this morning that I was not going to respond to any more threads.

Coming from someone who is still in the pain and learning stage, I know exactly how you feel when someone types something and you are like "Oh, my God, what just happened????" I came to this site because my therapist said that I should try and find some people who are going through or have been through some of the same experiences that I have.

Needless to say, I have gotten some very good advice, and I know that thre are some well spoken people out there who reached out at least once to me.

Others, have been very blunt and short about what "my problem" is and "what you need to do is..." These comments, although they may be true, have made me feel hurt and even more like giving up--like "oh, there is more stuff that I am not getting right."

After thinking about this a little bit more, I have come to 2 conclusions for myself. First, sometimes I think that when someone has been on this path of recovery, it might be hard to remember how they felt when they were just starting. Hindsight is always 20/20, and it is never that easy when you are going through it.

The second is that maybe, just maybe, they are having a short or bad day, or what I said hit them where they still hurt a little bit. Either way, perhaps I took what was said to me too personally....I know that I do that sometimes.

So, I am going to give this another try. I am going to try and take things not so personally and I am going to make sure that when people tell me stuff, instead of getting offended, I am going to ask more questions.

I am not saying this is what you should do--I just thought I would share my thoughts on my experience and how I have learned that I need to adapt a little bit for this to work for me.

November 22, 2006
9:23 am
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taj64
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thanks LTC (change that to TLC!). Im not really hard on myself at all. I felt bad it turn a turn so I said so. Hope you have a good turkey day. I think the holidays are causing some stress for some. It always intensifies what you are already feeling.

November 22, 2006
9:37 am
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santino
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Taj64, don't worry about it, You know or I hope you do, always appreciate the help you have to offer, you and many others have helped me out so much in my times of need. Many thanx to you and all my friends here. MUAH 🙂

November 22, 2006
9:52 am
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soprano2
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Sorry, Santino--

I wrote what I wrote to you before I read the other thread. All I have to say is WOW. You did handle youself very well.

And Taj, too--you did a very nice job standing up for what you think/feel. I liked your comment on taking or leaving your opinion. I will have to put that in my pocket for future use.

I don't feel sorry for what I wrote earlier....I still feel that way. But I wanted you to know that I wrote it before I know what was going on. Sorry.

November 22, 2006
11:11 am
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dereka
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Er OH MY GOSH.......thats crazy stuff.............................. sos for butting in but just read the posts whats up with everyone today I dont see no full moon. Hi Santino hope you are kool! For the record I think the advice was good. My advice is your kool and easy going its gonna take time mate so keep up your good sense of humour and watch this space for your next lady friend

November 22, 2006
12:12 pm
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Soulsister
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(((Santino)) Just stopping by to say hi..because it's been such a long time.....have a great day...Soulsister

Also, come visit us sometime..over on the libs side...me, China, Sd, Rising, H-gal and Lost. We are all there..talking about our day to day issues. see you around. 🙂

November 23, 2006
5:01 pm
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Worried_Dad
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I can't even find the thread in question.

November 23, 2006
5:18 pm
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bevdee
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WD

It is Get over it already

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