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what is cutting?
August 23, 2001
5:23 pm
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normally a person gets a blade of some sort and slices into their arm scratches or messages, by hate or love or frustration. It is deep and scras your body and mind forever!

August 23, 2001
6:37 pm
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damaged
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A cutter can cut any part of the body. I also have burned myself before. The whole process is called self-mutilation. From my experience of cutting and talking to other cutters yes it is usally done by a razor. In kind of a way it's a way to cry blood when you can't cry tears.
I hope someday I can say that my mind is not scared forever, but yes today it still bothers me that I would do or still may do this behavior.

Damaged

August 23, 2001
8:11 pm
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gingerleigh
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Self-mutilation... is this limited only to cutting or burning? Some people compulsively scratch themselves or pull their body hair. Is this similar?

August 23, 2001
8:15 pm
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veyr similar, it is a way of relasing anger, frustration in a milder form

another reason for cutting, is the only way u realise you are alive is to hurt yourself!

August 24, 2001
10:55 am
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damaged
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Listen
I am sorry that someone you love is cutting. You have ask alot of good questions here. Some of them I well have to really think about. I don't think I have less love in my heart because I cut for anyone but myself.
I have had a blockage in feelings for years because feelings were painful, so I medicated them with alcohol.
As far as my personality staying inside I don't think cutting has effected it but my drinking did. Yes I wish I could express myself better and it is something I am working on.
I do cry sometimes but maybe a tear or two. When I drank I could cry like a baby and not even remember it.
I don't know if I help any but I am also trying to understand this self-hurt thing. Damaged

August 24, 2001
12:27 pm
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Cici
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gingerleigh,

hair pulling and head scratching I think come under the term "trichotillomania". It's a compulsive behavior, related to Obsessive-Compulsive disorder, and is usually unrelated to self-mutilation, although OCD's can self-mutilate as well if they have problems with self-esteem and dissociative disorders.

August 24, 2001
2:09 pm
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gingerleigh
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Thank you Cici. I did not know.

August 24, 2001
2:16 pm
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Cici
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No problemo senorita! 🙂

August 24, 2001
4:48 pm
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Listen...

I have a freind who cuts, she does this because, she does not want to be controlled by her feelings, so she does not feel. She will not emotionlly cry or laugh with actually feeling. She had a hard life and was fed up with depression so stopped feeling. the pain from cutting reminds her she is alive

!!!

August 24, 2001
8:32 pm
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Molly
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this is just off the hip, but in reading over the last couple of years from the posters who have been brave enough to share, I wonder if, and please clarify my thoughts on this, is the cut also a way of demonstration, when there is no one listening that hey, hello, this is pain I am feeling, see the blood, since you didn't notice anything else before? Or in a sense similar to the immediate gratifacation, instant evidence of ------------- fill in the blank, pain, frustration,apathy, all of the above? I know that it is not new, just wasn't as common decades before. The general feeling of worthlessness is how the older woman explained it to me, flirting with suicide she suggested, not really wanting or caring to live, but not ready to die.

August 24, 2001
9:16 pm
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Katherine
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I never cut for attention, or for a cry for help. Actually, I hid my cuts, the scars are only visible when I wear a bathing suit (upper thigh area). I think some people do cut as a cry for help. I've seen that. For me, I just had so much pain inside that I couldn't find any other way to get it out. I heard this line in a movie, and I think it describes why I personally did it, what it accomplished for me: "Sometimes, when it all gets to be too much, I make a little hole and it all escapes." After I cut, I was completly relaxed and at ease. I spent so much energy on it that I had non left and I could just be, not feel. I hope this helped some.
Kate

August 25, 2001
1:49 pm
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gingerleigh
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I am not a "cutter" per se, but I do fight with hair pulling and scarring urges... I'm not sure if that puts me into the trichotillomania category, but I can relate to some of the sentiments people have expressed. It's something that I've done since I was a teenager, and never have admitted to anyone. I have many scars on my legs, and when people comment on them I usually say that they are mosquito bites. The face is harder to hide, so the Clinique Counter and I are great friends. Oil-free foundation is a woman's best friend... I hate the scars, but for some reason I hate not scarring myself more than I hate having the scars. I definitely don't do it for attention either. I usually only do it when I'm upset about something and can't stop thinking about it. And I usually do feel a huge sense of relief afterwards.

I also feel like the hair or the blemish represents "bad" and "evil" in me, and by removing the hair or making myself bleed, I am purging my body of the evil somehow.

Recently I noticed that I've been doing this less, I suspect because I've taken more control over my life and work and am learning to live relatively happily on my own. But I still slip sometimes and see that I've done it again...

I found this site on the web, and it had some suggestions for things to do when compulsions strike. http://www.i5ive.com/article.c.....ival/57975

I've admitted this to someone. This is huge for me. Thanks for listening.

August 25, 2001
5:01 pm
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well when u say she never learned how to handle it, this is how she handles it but for me it is not the right way, for a scar marks for ever as i know, physcally and mentally.

Does "ure baby" write messages or just scratch lines?

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