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What does she mean?
September 20, 2006
2:46 am
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santino
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I asked my ex's sister not to talk 2 me about my ex anymore. She told me she'd respect that. Yesterday she runs up 2 me and before I could say hi she tells me " I told her that you said that you didn't care that she was moving to Texas 2 start a new life and she got mad and said "ow yeah!! Good than, I'm glad he thinks that way!!" Now, what I said 2 her sister was that it didn't matter if she went because we haven't talked in over a month and haven't seen eachother in over 6 weeks" So she got mad I said, ok and walked away I did. These girls are so much drama. I kept my distant from the sister all day after that and I didn't even speak to her today. The only thing that bothers me is that with the no-contact we still respected eachother and now with this missinterputed piece of news she recieved shes mad. I guess I'm just not understand the whole "ow yeah, well good, Im glad he feels that way" comment, what does that mean?

September 20, 2006
3:00 am
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bonita1
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it must have stung and she wanted to sting ya back, hon. Don't worry about it and cut all ties with your ex's family. Its the best way to maintain no contact. Really works, too.

~~bonita

September 20, 2006
3:36 am
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Zinnie
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In the grand scheme of things? Who cares what she thinks, be the perception understood or mis-understood. You two have broken up. You have chosen to move on. You specifically told the sister "don't want to discuss the topic." She immediately turned it into something else, then had to come running to tell you of the whole drama of doing EXACTLY WHAT YOU ASKED HER NOT TO DO!

You are better off away from the whole bunch - sounds like to me.

Z.

September 20, 2006
3:42 am
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santino
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bonita and zinnie thanks, I appreciate the response 🙂

September 20, 2006
7:55 am
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CAMER
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ahhhhhh seems like the sister likes the drama, even after you told her not to talk about the ex, she still brings up her name.

Maybe the ex is feeling a lil' down, thinking that maybe you are moving on and not caring about her....the
ex may just be looking for some sobbing from you and hasn't realized that maybe you are moving on.

I agree with the others here posting, i'd stay away from the entire family!

September 20, 2006
8:29 am
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risingfromtheashes
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santino,

this is why you have to STOP talking to the sister.

cuz the sister is being the middle man and the sister is going to continue sucking you into the drama.

you really need to draw some hard lines in the sand with the sister.

you can't stop the sister from talking to her sister about you, but you can stop her from talking to you about it.

and that was also why I said not to really say anything to the sister, except a simple explanation "I do not want to discuss your sister" and NOTHING MORE....because by saying you want to move on, she took that info back to the sister and it was all twisted around.

Keep it simple - then nobody can twist your words.

At this point - don't have any discussions - if her sister tries to talk to you about her - stop her mid sentence and say "I do not want to discuss this" and walk away.....if she continues, ask her if she has any work related issues to discuss....if she says no, then keep walking.

Don't keep explaining yourself - that keeps you engaged in the drama....remember, keep it simple....and don't feel like you have to explain why....NO is a complete sentence

September 20, 2006
9:03 am
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gayle
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Rising I could not have said it better myself. Santino, I think the sister you work with likes this drama and stirring things up. Look back, she has talked to you about your ex even after you asked her not to, she hit on you- believe me with the intent of accidently spilling the beans to her sister, after this doesn't work then she comes to you telling you her sister is moving- if this is even true, she is constantly trying to stir up something. Maybe she is just looking for something to talk to you about- she obviously likes you. I think she is TROUBLE, be careful dear friend. A.

September 20, 2006
9:03 am
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lovetocrochet
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Can't add any more than anyone else did, other than suggest if the sister ever approaches you again, before she opens her mouth you could say some snide remark about asking if she's going for a Best Drama Oscar and then walking away... 🙂

September 20, 2006
9:10 am
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wazz
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Santino - they are all right. The sister is totally toxic and living vicariously off your drama.

She probably has a dull life...

Hang in there - you did nothing wrong.

Love.

September 20, 2006
11:42 am
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santino
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Thanx all, very helpful 🙂

September 20, 2006
12:07 pm
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gayle
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How are you today?A.

September 20, 2006
12:26 pm
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santino
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Hi Gayle, good and you?!

September 20, 2006
12:29 pm
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gayle
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Very well, thank you! Do you have another date lined up with the girl you took out the other night? A.

September 20, 2006
12:33 pm
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santino
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We spoke yesterday and we talked for about an hour, were both busy this up coming weekend, shes going to pick up her mom in San Diego, shes going to pick up her friend in San Diego, she asked me if I wanted to go for the ride, but I have 2 work this weekend. 🙁 Hey why do you think my ex got mad, when her sister told her what I said? Im so new 2 this, I wish I knew what went threw u girlses heads 🙂

September 20, 2006
12:40 pm
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risingfromtheashes
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not A. but I would guess that she's mentally unbalanced and while she may not want you, she may not want you to be happy either.

she may have said she was moving to "bait you" into a reaction - one that you would say "no, don't leave....", so she would know you still cared.

by saying "go on and good luck", you essentially told her that you didn't care, or that it could be interpretted that way.

September 20, 2006
12:42 pm
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gayle
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You are so funny! Hopefully, you guys will be able to see eachother again soon! Its nice that she invited you along for the ride! Ok, I have a couple thoughts on this 1- I don't even know if its true that she is moving, the sister may have said it to see what you would say. 2- However if she is moving and the sister is meddling in this and doing this go-between thing, you first have to consider the source, you don't know exactly what was said or how it was said. If you take it at face value then your ex may have her feelings hurt thinking you don't care. It doesn't mean she wants to get back together with you but it is a natural reaction to a rejection to feel defensive. The sister may talk about you all the time to your ex, your ex knows you work together and there may be issues with them where the sister wants to make your ex jealous. I know it all seems very complicated and there could be any number of reasons, I don't know them personally to really give you good advice about what is going through their heads, these are just some suggestions. Sounds like drama to me and I can't stand drama! I like peace in my life.

So, don't forget the next time you are down this way, look me up and I will make a nice southern dinner for you!:) A.

September 20, 2006
12:42 pm
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santino
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Thanks Rising, you always know these things, I wish I was as wise as all of you 🙂

September 20, 2006
12:45 pm
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santino
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NICE!!! tHE THOUGHT OF REAL GRAVY, NOT KFC GRAVY IS REASON IN ITSELF 2 MAKE THE TRIP 🙂

September 20, 2006
12:46 pm
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gayle
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Yes, real gravy, homemade fried chicken. I can even make biscuits- I am a real life southern belle- no hoop skirts, thankfully:) And sweet tea! Ok, what would you like for dessert?A.

September 20, 2006
12:48 pm
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santino
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Hmm....good question, I don't know how to answere that 🙂 j/k, how about.... I don't know...what do you s. belles like 2 bake?

September 20, 2006
12:52 pm
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gayle
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Well being that this is the peach state how about peach cobbler? You are too funny:) A.

September 20, 2006
12:53 pm
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risingfromtheashes
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biscuits!!!!!!!!!!

sorry, couldn't resist....love ya A.!

and I'll tell you a secret - A. likes ice cream w/m&m's in it!!!

September 20, 2006
12:54 pm
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santino
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I do like peaches! You would do all that for me? You are a keeper 🙂

September 20, 2006
12:58 pm
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santino
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I'll bring the ice cream!

September 20, 2006
1:01 pm
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risingfromtheashes
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she is a peach...I know this for fact!!!! she will make someone a very wonderful partner some day!!!

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