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unhappiness is.......
December 5, 2003
12:58 pm
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HARRYO
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Why do we always see others as the
major source of our unhappiness?
It usually starts with disappointment,
and ultimately becomes dispair.
We want those that disappoint us to
say "I'm sorry that I disappointed you
how can I make you happy? When they
don't do this we assign blame.
Why can't we grasp that our happiness
comes from within?
I remember I had an industrial accident
a little over ten years ago. I nearly
was electricuted by putting my hand
in an open 440 volt circuit. Fortuneately
the conditions weren't right to
kill me. If the path of the electricity
would have been conducted through
my heart, I would have died.
Instead I lost control of my muscles
for a few seconds they call it the
"let go" stage where you can't let go
of what you have grabbed on to.
When I did let go it threw me across
the room. The most terrifying 5 or
6 seconds of my life. Good metaphor
huh.

December 5, 2003
1:23 pm
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sixfootblonde
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I think our unhappiness in others and the ways they can disappoint us are a result of us expecting too much from them. It's hard to remember they are only human too and I know I often build people up too high and am bitterly disappointed when they prove my (too high) expectations to be wrong. Then I look at see why I'm so disappointed and realize I need to give others leeway to be as human as I CERTAINLY am! *grin*

So much comes right back to us as individuals. My metaphor is the lens. We all have a different hued lens thru which we view the world. We cannot complain if the trees look a different shade thru our color of lens. You know?

December 5, 2003
1:36 pm
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arwen
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And who am I to "expect" anything from anyone other than myself? Yet, I do...

Arwen

December 5, 2003
2:03 pm
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HARRYO
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That's it! Unreasonable expectations.
From ourselves and others. Usually
that's when the good things
happen when we least expect them to.
When I look back on hooking up
with friends and lovers, I wasn't
really looking for anything.
By not forcing the issue and
being patient things just
happened. Sometimes we
need to lower our expectations
and let things come to us. Forcing
the issue can be the wrong approach.

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