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Unbelieveable. Don't waste time agonizing over people who are not worth it. (Tiger here)
June 14, 2007
4:31 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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This year being tortured by a principal who was less than positive about my teaching methods. In fact he was crictical. Actually he was down right negative. At the end of the year he gave me an downright insulting evaluation and moved me from 4th grade to second because he said he didnt' think I should be teaching grades that were invovled in state testing. EEEWWWW. that had me depressed for weeks.

So i am taking all these workshops to prepare to teach younger kids when low and behold the district oh so discreetly and oh so quietly takes him away and demotes him toe assistant principal of another school. the new principal comes up to me and asks why was I assigned to 2nd when I made such amazing progress with the students in writing? Holy freaking unbelieavable!!!
Clearly the old principal was not thinking straight when he was our principal and this new one has a good head on her shoulders.

My questions. Why did I waste so much time agonizing over what someone thought of me when he clearly could not do his job correctly? why do we agonize over anyone who is not worthy of us.

June 14, 2007
4:45 pm
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feelingfree
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Tiger~

I just wanted to say.. what a GREAT post- you must be thrilled.. and I'm very happy for you!!

You obviously learned a great lesson.. I'm sure you'll think of this any time you doubt yourself again 🙂

What goes around...
🙂

June 14, 2007
8:09 pm
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Rasputin
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I agree 100% TT!!!

TT~

I was once criticized and even fired by a supervisor who resented me jealously. Jealousy is a very negative emotion that can destroy its beholder. I was traumatized and agnonized about it. In fact, I was a less healthy person then. I think when we are emotionally- damaged people, we tend to take what others speak of us personally.

Nowadays, I still come across such creepy people who don't like me and I try to stay away from them. If, sadly, they happened to be in an authority position, I try to look somewhere else.

In retrospect, I feel sorry for these people. I think when they do it with impure or evil motive, this shows how sick these people are.

I've seen so many supervisors/co-workers that really need a psychiatric intervention & yet they're not doing anything about it and mind you, no one is speaking up to them. Of course, I learned to run right away from these people. This is downright Abuse and may be even bullying. These people are taking advantage of their position to demean, and degarde others who are hard-working and brilliant in their job.

I'm thrilled that justice took care of him!!!:)

June 15, 2007
12:14 am
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readyforachange
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Tiger...I think it is hugely codependent of us to care so deeply about what others think of us. I know I am overly concerned - sometimes to the point of obsession - with other people's opinions of me. I have to work very, very hard at not placing too much emphasis on the negative opinions others sometimes have of me. Not everyone will like us, and we just have to learn to live with that.

I'm glad this all worked out for you, and your worth as an educator was finally applauded! You've learned a valuable lesson!

June 15, 2007
7:25 am
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bonni
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I think we can't help it. Its part of our inner instinct of self preservation. When we realize that someone doesn't like us, we respond to the potential threat. People who don't like us will not act it our best interest and may in fact pose a real danger. Children learn very early to try to placate the adults who have power over them. You are only threatened by people who don't like you who also have some potential to cause you harm - your boss, an influential colleague, anyone close enough to you for you to realize they don't like you poses some threat.

Our instincts are there for a reason. What I think we have to do is separate the threat associated with that person's opinion and our opinion of ourselves. It could be a form of self defense to try to correct the person's perception of us, if that's possible, at a minimum give the appearance of trying to placate the person. Sometimes, we have to remove the person from our lives by moving to another situation.

Bottom line, I think you have to respect and honor your gut feelings that you have in response to these people and choose rationally how to manage your external response to the situation. Ignoring people who pose an actual threat could be dangerous.

Maybe codependent people are just more sensitive to the feelings of others and we just have to learn how to turn that to our advantage.

bonni

June 15, 2007
4:43 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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You all are great. Bonni, your advice was great.
I am sitting here laughing at myself. I have been teaching in this district 7 years. 4 of my evaluations were excellent with one recoomendation. One was perfect and then I had this bad one. My friends all tell me what a good teacher I am. I think i am good teacher. and then I've been obsessing for weeks about this bad evaluation from a guy who wasn't even doing his job.

I need to have more faith in myself (my gut instinct, right, Bonni) I need to have more faith in my friends.

Next time I will.

June 19, 2007
12:53 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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I talked to my therapists about my principal. She has me working on some self esteem issues because I should have been able to discount his evaluations. She also urged me to write a letter to go in my personnel file so that in years to come, that bad evaluation will have a decent explanation. i don't know. What would I say? Should I come right out and see this guy didn't do his job? He based is evaluation on wrong conclusions? that doesnt' sound very professional.

June 19, 2007
1:00 pm
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fantas
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Tiger, did you sign that you agreed with the evaluation or did you dispute it? I agree with your therapist, you should write a dispute letter stating that contradictions between this evaluation and all your other one. If you do not dispute it, it will appear like you agreed with the evaluation.

June 19, 2007
4:16 pm
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Zinnie
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I was thinking about this earlier myself. Why agonize over friends and family that call me with their problems when they have NO intentions of dealing with them for themselves? I have been listening to some people tell me the same exact story for over five years in some cases.

I have come to this decision - if they are not going to address their issues - why should I bother? I have only one person in this life that I need to take care of - and that is ME - and frankly? That is enough.

June 19, 2007
8:20 pm
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Thanks fantas,
Signing an evaluation in our district is just saying you saw it. I need to right the letter but I don't know how to do it so it doesn't sound whiney. should I write about that he never saw me teach? should I address other issues or only those in the evaluation.

Zinnie,
It seems I've always had this problem. i worry about what people think of me. When they don't appear to 'like' me. I get stressed. So the opinion of people who dont' like me ends up being more important than those of my friends and family. How stupid is that?

June 19, 2007
10:32 pm
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mj
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Your not the only one who has felt like other's approval was so important. I am learning to approve and love myself and not get so hung up on what others think of me. It takes lots of practice for me.

Congratulations on a job well done. I am glad that you got a new principal. Write your response like the professional that you are. Tell it like it is. State what you have shared...the principal was highly critical after spending 10 minutes in your classroom and telling you it was clutter. Share that you were in the midst of a play. Be Real and Trust YOURSELF!

June 20, 2007
1:52 pm
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truthBtold
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Tiger,

Years ago, I proudly wore a bumper sticker on my car: "Question Authority"

Worked then, works now 🙂

tBt

June 21, 2007
3:53 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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Thanks for your advice and encouragement.
Here is the letter I plan to have put in my personnel file explaining my low evaluation. What do ya'll think? is it specific? Is it professional? I left out a lot of the personal spiteful things he did because it wasn't specific to my evaluation.

To Whom it May Concern:

This letter is in regard to the evaluation for the 2006-2007 school year given to me by Mr. XX. he has rated me as Satisfactory in Classroom Mangement, Curriculum Knowledge and Curriculum Planning. I do not feel that these rating reflect my true ability as a teacher.

My purpose in writing this letter is to wxplain why some of those rating should not apply. At the time we went over my evauatlion. Mr. XX stated that the satisfactory ratings in those categories were because of the disorganization he found in my room. it is true that at times my classroom seems disorganized but all the materials in my classroom are used and can be easily found by both my students and myself.

In regards to the rating of Satisfactory in Curriculum Knowledge I feel that my knowlegeof currulum is very high. It is been seen in how my team was able to rely on me for support in Math and other subjects. Furthermore, I was never officially observed by Mr. XX or any other person from school admiistration. I feel that such an observation would show that I am knowledgable in planning and curriculum knowledge. My coolelgues can state that I was prepared for classes and was well versed in all the curricula for fourth grade.

Sincerely,
TT.

Well; guys what do you think. Is my point clear?

June 21, 2007
6:48 pm
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gracenotes
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Tiger,

Sounds good, your letter, and yes, you should question this review and toot your own horn about your accomplishments. In fact, if you have any specific accomplishments, be sure to supply the details. Can you give some specific examples of being a leader to your team and helping them out? I don't think tooting our own horn exactly comes naturally for all of us, but it is important to do in a work environment.

I've been through the job evaluation thing. I had a job for 7 years. In my 5 or 6th year I "topped out" in promotions and also received a 14% raise, partly for the promotion, and partly for merit and a wonderful review, just as I did every year. My supervisor and I shared the same philosophies of work and things were fine. Then he left, new supervisor. Well the "n" of the unit starting lighting a fire about what a terrible employee I was.

Within six months, doing my same job the same way, but with new supervisor, now I was a "problem" and I was on probation, was written up for nonsense. I even tried to transfer out of the unit, but they wouldn't let me. So, two co-workers, including the "n", confabulated a story and were successful in getting the ball rolling in getting me canned.

I never cried or anything. I was planning on leaving in 6 or 8 months, and instead I got to leave earlier with 6 months of unemployment. I did fight back legally thought and did get a sort of settlement, and "n" had to keep his big mouth shut forever more. That was expensive and not sure it was worth it. Wouldn't go that route again but it was a way of standing up for myself.

Unemployment benefits went way up that month and I lived mostly on that and started my own business working with some of the vendors, even sent a check to the old company I was fired from requesting payment for services rendered by the vendor, and got paid. Hahaha.

In fact, the best thing I learned that day of being fired was how much people I worked with in the field, the vendors, liked me and my working style, and how much they despised the jerk who plotted to get me fired. I never ever knew they throught so highly of me. I was surprised. And, I found I had some real friends there, some who I still get together this.

Guess what. He, the "n" is still there doing the same old stuff, I had my business, I had a new job for 5 years, which was fine, and I am going back to school full time this fall starting a new career.

In my last job of 5 years, they did not even waste their time with evaluations. I thought that was great!

June 21, 2007
7:00 pm
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fantas
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Tiger, This sounds good. I would include the result of your previous evaluations from your other principals as evidence of your teaching capacity. Could you also add the improvement in your student's performance is further proof of your level of performance? Your new principal was able to note it so it's worth mentioning. Also when an evaluations is done, shouldn't the principal offer his suggestions? What did he base your evaluation on? All the best 🙂

June 22, 2007
3:44 pm
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Tiger Trainer
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Gracenotes and fantas,
thanks for your suggestions. I like the idea of putting in my accomplishements like the history of Florida play. I guess I should mention past evaluations too because last year I got a perfect score.

It really helps me to get info on this letter. i 've never protested authority like this but I really and sincerely believe that it was unfair.

So I am going to take a deep breath and do it.

June 22, 2007
4:11 pm
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atalose
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Tiger Trainer,

I agree, put in all your accomplishments. Also, I would begin the letter with the fact that you were never observed by Mr. XX or anyone in administration. I wouldn't say that at times your classroom is disorganized I would leave that part out. If I recall didn’t you mentioned that his man no longer works there or was demoted? You might want to put that in as well. Say you attempted to talk to Mr. XX regarding your review but he was unavailable as he was transferred to a lower position at other school.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

June 23, 2007
2:28 am
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Zinnie
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Hi TT,

Although you make some excellent points, if it were me? I would change it to read:

To Whom it May Concern:

This letter is in regard to the evaluation for the 2006-2007 school year given to me by Mr. XX. He has given me as Satisfactory (rating) in Classroom Mangement, Curriculum Knowledge and Curriculum Planning. I do not feel that these rating reflect my true ability as a teacher, and offer the following as back up information as to why some of those rating(s) should not apply.

To begin with I was never officially observed by Mr. XX or any other person from school administration. At the time we went over my evauatlion. Mr. XX stated that the satisfactory ratings in those categories were because of the disorganization he found in my room. While it is true that at times my classroom seems disorganized, it is due to the fact that all the materials in my classroom are used by both myself and my students in the course of teaching; however, they are easily accessible by both my students and myself.

In regards to the rating of Satisfactory in Curriculum Knowledge I feel that my knowlege of the curriculum is very high. It is been seen in how my team was able to rely on me for support in Math and other subjects. I feel that such an observation would show that I am knowledgable in planning and curriculum knowledge. My colleagues can state that I was prepared for classes and was well versed in all the curriculam for fourth grade.

Perhaps some food for thought?

Z.

June 24, 2007
9:31 pm
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Zinnie,
I really like how you reworked my paragraph. the way you did it it states everything I wanted to say without sounding apoligetic of myself or vindictive toward him. I've reworded it my original that way and I like the ring it has.

Thanks so much ya'll for the input. I really appreciate the time you took to give me suggestions. i've never stood up for myself this way.

The letter is ready and tomorrow I will make copies and deliver them to the school and the district office to be put in my permanent file. Gulp Gulp deep breath. Wish me luck everybody. This Tiger making a major life change.

June 24, 2007
11:02 pm
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fantas
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Tiger...Way to go!!! Be strong and take those letters tomorrow.

June 25, 2007
12:33 am
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Zinnie
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Hi Tiger Trainer,

Good luck, stand stong and for what you believe and keep us posted.

Love,

Z.

July 1, 2007
9:28 am
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Tiger Trainer
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WEll I took the letter down but no one was at school and the person at the downtown office was on vacation. So I am going to go through the whole thing again starting tomorrow.
I;'ve been on vacation in Key West and so I've been able to forget the whole thing for a while. But tomorrow no matter what that letter is going into my personnel file.

thanks for your support. I would never have been able to do it without your support and suggestions.

I am the new tiger fighting for my rights.

July 1, 2007
1:44 pm
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mj
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Glad you were able to go on vacation and enjoy yourself!

July 2, 2007
8:14 pm
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I am so discouraged. I was told bby the district office that I was supposed to have the school do it. the secretary who is supposed to do it isnt' there. I don't know if I want everyone at school knowing my business but I must get that letter in there so the new principal can see it.

July 2, 2007
8:34 pm
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Zinnie
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Hi TT,

What do they mean that the secretary of the school has to do the letter?

Z.

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