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Turning into my mother
September 3, 2000
1:22 am
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krissy
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September 24, 2010
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I just turned 30 and have known for about 5 years that I've been turning into my mother. All her bad habits, how she would ruin every happy moment or event that accured in my life and now I am doing it to my husband. We've been married a year this october and we love each other so much, but yet I treat him with such disrespect. I can't control myself and everything he does I judge or get mad at him. I don't know what to do. I can't go back to therapy right now because I'm just so busy with my job. I know I'm not alone and many women can't help but turn into our mothers because it's learned behavior. Tonight was the first time that I just wanted to walk out and give up. I've been with my husband all together almost 8 years and we've had our ups and downs but pressure with work and I've been feeling very lonely. All these emotions are building up and I just don't know how to handle them. I've been gettin anxiety attacks more often than usual. Any advice out there?

September 3, 2000
7:01 am
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Iris
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September 29, 2010
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I think that the best thing is to communicate with your husband.You have been together for 8 years and you feel lonely, don't you disclose yourselves to each other? I suggest that you disclose your emotions to him now. You might want to read something about intrrpersonal communication.Or, if you wish, we can elaborate more here.

Good Luck

September 4, 2000
5:31 pm
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Molly
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September 30, 2010
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What makes it worse is when you look in the mirror and see her, that is when you just want to pack it in, but where ever you go , there you are. I did every thing I could to avoid being my mother, I realized that we are our parents, so when I give pre marital counseling , I say look at his or her mom and dad. sorry but when she popps into your life all you can do is be aware, and try to be different, it feels strange, but awareness is the most signifigant part, then practice makes perfect. Try to get to the root of the behavior, and work it forward again, most comes from anger, and lack of action, take responsibility, don't be a victim, and move on, sourround your self with things that make you smile, and get over it. You and your husband can survive, if you really want to, like the joke states, how many psych's does it take to change a light bulb, many but the light really has to want to change.

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