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tiring of being myself
September 29, 2009
10:50 am
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blueriver
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hello there..firstly, sorry if u cannot understand my english because i am not good in english. i just write here to let out my feelings. i hope, anyone who read this can help me by share their thoughts and words.

to be honest i am suffering from one of my biggest weaknesses-which is i am a timid/introverted kind of person. i usually live alone and most of the time people around me like to make fun of me or bullying me. and i think, the reason why i became introverted is that i am also suffering from bad breath. i usually tend to get away from people because i am scared that they would laugh and make fun of me because of my bad breath.i dont know why my mouth is so smelly though i brush my teeth 3 times a day.to overcome it, i usually chew bubble gum or eat candy.until sometimes i afraid that i can easily get diabetes.

so,i am tiring of being myself.everyday i get stress because people likes to make fun of me, say bad thing behind my back, and some of them dont even want to make friends of me. i usually live alone, lonely and pathetic. i feel like im a loser with no friends.i hate being me...:(

September 29, 2009
11:06 am
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lollipop3
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Hi Blueriver and welcome,

I'm sorry you are feeling so down right now and I'm sorry that you have had to experience cruelty at the hands of others.

You are not a loser. It seems to me that you may very well have a medical condition (bad breathe) and are understandably suffering low self esteem as a result.

Have you been to a doctor or dentist about your condition? Perhaps it is something that can be treated with medication or a change in diet?

Also, I have heard that fresh spearmint may be helpful. If I remember correctly I read that it is more effective than gum or mints (especially those containing sugar which can make the situation worse). In addtion, without sugar you can worry less about developing diabetes.

Another suggestion would be, in addtion the the spearmint, you could try an antiseptic mouth wash such as listerine as opposed to something like Scope which contains sugar.

I do suggest seeing a doctor though if you have not already just to rule out any more serious medical conditions.

Hopefully, if you can overcome this obsticle, it will help you gain some confidence and perhaps open the door for you to try to get out there and meet new people.

I hope this helps. And feel free to post here if you're feeling lonely. There are usually people around to talk if you need to.

Take care,
Lolli

September 29, 2009
11:37 am
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blueriver
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hi lollipop3. thank u for ur support. id tried listerine but it make my mouth smell worst after 5 minutes i using it. and i feel ashamed to go to dentist because of my bad breathe. hopefully one day i would be able to force myself to go to dentist.

by the way, thank u so much for your kindness. i really need a friend right now. i just wanna be a normal person who have their own life with lots of friends. to be honest, because of i am a timid person, i usually feel awkward when im around with people. i feel nervous when new people try to communicate with me.haha...i think no one like me. i just a loser

September 29, 2009
11:50 am
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lollipop3
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Hi Blue,

You are very welcome but you don't need to thank me for my kindness. You deserve kindness but virtue of being a human being.

And that may very well be a good place for you to start in your healing process......work on stopping that negative self-talk.

Instead of saying I am a loser. Try saying I am NOT a loser. Try replacing all those negative thoughts with postive ones. It seems awkward in the beginning but it really can change the way we think and feel about ourselves.

Also, please don't feel ashamed to go the dentist. They are professionals and that is what they are there for. I'm willing to bet no matter how bad you think your situation is...they have seen and treated worse.

I do hope you can find the strength within yourself because you are worth it!

September 29, 2009
11:55 am
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chelonia mydas
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Hi Blue River

Welcome to AAC!! I'm glad you are here and have shared your situation.

I just finished talking to my sister, who is a dental hygenist, about your situation and she recommends that you go to a dentist. It is a common issue that they even have a medical term for, halitosis. They will be able to help you and she said that you shouldn't be embarrassed about your condition at all. They are used to people coming to them with such a situation. That is why they are in that field of work, to help people with their oral care, including managing halitosis.

If you had a deep cut that was bleeding all over the place and making a mess would you not go to the doctor? probably not. You would go and they would help you clean up and heal from your cut. Dentists are there to help you manage your bad breath in the same way doctors are there to help stitch up a deep cut.

My sister also said that in a very few cases halitosis might be a sypmtom of untreated problems with the patient's digestive sysemt, respritory system or sinuses. Some of these problems could be serious and need medical attention from a doctor. If the dentist suspects that this is the case, they will refer the patient to a doctor for proper treatment.

So please go to your dentist as soon as you can. It sounds like this is more than just a social impairment, but one that is medical.

You seem like a very likable person. I hope you continue to post here.

If you want to hang out with some cyberfriends, stop by the Coffeehouse thread. We are always looking for new folks to share conversation with.

September 29, 2009
12:03 pm
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chelonia mydas
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I agree with Lolli,

You should start telling yourself that you are a wonderful person with much to offer this world.

Please replace the word Looser with other L words that describe you much better. I might suggest any of the following: Likable, Lovable, Lovely, Lively, Leader, Loving etc. Some others include Wonderful, Worthy, Nice, Terrific, Friendly, Considerate, Intelligent, etc.

Sending you acceptance, friendship and lots of hugs.

September 29, 2009
12:10 pm
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atalose
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blue,

Welcome, glad you found us!!!!

You are getting some great advice from some pretty terrific people!!!!

Here’s something that I have learned…………

You can't think your way into a new way of living...you have to live your way into a new way of thinking.

Hope you stick around……

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

September 29, 2009
12:23 pm
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blueriver
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do u know why i keep thanking u for ur kindness? it is because i feel so bless to have someone that are so friendly and care for me.it is rare for me to have a friend that is...just like u and the others at ACC.

hi chelonia mydas.thank u for u too. ok. i will go to dentist.err...since ur sister is a dental hygenist, may i know how much would it be cost if i go to dentist?do i need a to do some sort of treatment(that would cost a lot) or they just clean up my mouth..

September 29, 2009
1:24 pm
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atalose
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blue,

That might be a hard question to answer as we all live in different countries, states, etc. etc. What I pay here in the NY City area for a dental visit may not be what you or anyone else will pay.

Why don’t you make some local calls to dentists in your area and find out what they charge for an initial office visit. If you have dental insurance as I do, it covers most of my expense for cleaning and x-rays.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

September 29, 2009
1:36 pm
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chelonia mydas
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Hi BlueRiver,

I'm so glad to hear that you are willing to go to the dentist. The cost of going to a dentist is different depending on where you live. Shop around and see if any of them have a sliding scale for payment if you are low income. As for the cost of treatment, that would depend on the cause of your bad breath. It could be as simple as having your teeth cleaned but until you go to the dentist you won't know. Sometimes there are even clinics for low income patients in some locations. My sister volunteers a few times a year at a women's shelter to clean teeth and teach the kids how to properly brush. The dentist she works for gets donations from some of the toothpaste companies to provide all the supplies. But to qualify for that clinic, you have to sign up ahead of time and show financial need.

You are worth seeking treatment and the money it will cost to receive that treatment. There are a variety of options out there. If the first dentist you contact can't help, continue to try another and another until you find what you need.

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