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tired of being unhappy
September 12, 2000
4:51 am
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lazydazy
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late night...i have the cant sleep disease. Just realized im unhappy with several aspects of my life. I need a good girlfriend. I've surrounded myself by people w/different interests than me. Other depressed people are bad for one depressed person, my boyfriend is depressed also and I think we are making each other miserable, is that possible? I feel it has alot to do with the area Im in-I dont have the same interests as alot of people here-im more the outdoorsy type-most people ive met like to party to the extreme or stay indoors. Its hard to meet people of the same sex that enjoy the same things as me. Im used to having that one person to do things with...hiking, talking, playing games, watersports..my family is not near, when I went home I had my mom or sister to go on midnight walks with or go running. All of my close friends are hundreds of miles away now.
Im graduating in December and going through this period of not being where I want to be. I've had great experiences in college, but mostly were from life and not education. Im not a school-oriented person. I dont feel technologically advanced for the real world. I want to go to school for web design but dont have the money.
I think of the times I have been happy in the past couple of years and they were both in different countries, traveling-not worrying about anything, being carefree and free-spirited. where is that person hiding? I feel like there is this creative side of me dying to get out...the one thing that made me happiest lately is decorating my room. so silly, but I was in control of it creatively and its so comfortable and im proud of it now.
Ive been spending hours on end, sending out resumes and looking up continuing education opportunites. Im tired.
My problems seem so miniscule to others, but its enough to make me depressed, sad and anxious.
My love life is so complicated lately. My boyfriend has been relying on me too much lately. He has secrets he needs to tell others and I think he is afraid of getting close to others cause he is scared they will find out his secrets and think badly of him. I love him and care about him, and I want to help him. The thing is that im depressed now, and being around him brings me down further. Im going to counseling every week but he only went once. I dont know how to explain the importance of going on a regular basis to him. He just says that he needs someone to dump his problems on when they are too much for him to handle, so he'll only go and talk to him once.
sometimes I just want to run away to Belize.

September 12, 2000
1:33 pm
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Molly
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Can we get a group rate? I am some what in the same place mentally. No 1. tell your boyfreind to talk to a counselor and leave it at that. Tell him that you are tapped out, and that your counselor has suggested that you focus on your issues for the time being. I'll be your counselor for the minuet, so no story. We can only give so much then we need to replenish, this is you replenish time. It sounds to me like you are not living authentically. Something that has kept me awake at night, and anxious during the day. I need to be at the beach, to hear it, to know it is close, the gulls flying over head, is so grounding to me. Even great scapes of green, but no I am currently trapped between asphalt cities where out door activities means going to the mall and buying more stuff, you can't afford, or really need. Each house is so close to each other, I can hear the people fart and flush. I get up in the morning and think is this it. That is depressing, so instead I am trying to make a plan, on how to get what I want and where I need to be. I am sourrounded with people who are comfortable with the what ever, and I want to know what is on the other side of the mountain, even if I do have to climb it!!!!!! I have discovered that there is a cost for everything, and I guess giving up this level of comfort=== with changes will bring me closer to the comfort I want. It takes energy, and a plan. The airlines are hiring now, and that is one way that I can think of to travel, meet people, and make money, it doesn't have to be a life career, but a stepping stone. Since I have had several careers, I realize it is better to find one and stick to it to prosper, but since I didn't do that I am just looking for a way to have some fun working before retirement. List every thing that you want, list everything that you want to do, and list where you want to be. Find a common path. Just don't try to settle, like stay where your boyfriend wants to be, you may never reach your dreams, then you will stay where you are emotionally today. Action beats depression

September 12, 2000
1:46 pm
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Cici
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Oh my God, do I completely understand where you are and where you're coming from!! I think the technical term for it is zeitgeist: roughly translated, "the spirit of the times." That common current among like-minded people.

As I apply to graduate schools and think about the loans I've already got to pay back, I get nauseous. And I'm thinking, what the hell do I want to do, anyway? All I really want is to live in the woods and have a garden and a big front porch and a living room with squishy chairs and a huge library and the gentle lapping hum of a lake where I can canoe early in the morning.

Sometimes being in a LTR (long term relationship) is such a burden. And for women it's especially dangerous. We start to get used to being with our partner and I don't know about you, but I am STARVED for female interaction. I just can't find ones with similar interests. And when I do, we usually end up just drifiting apart because they get caught up taking care of their lives, children and husbands, and I get caught up with my own life and entertaining my fiance's friends.

I get up to go to work in teh morning nad I stare at the celing when I first wake up. So many responsibilities. Did I pay this bill or that bill? When am I going to fix the toilet? I have to run this or that errand, I have a paper to write, I have a doctor's appointment, I have to visit my parents...AAAAAAARRRGGGGH.

I want to crawl into a dark, deep hole and just sleep. Be alone.

I went to the doctor to talk about this. She prescribed sleeping pills and said good luck, this is life, kid. I don't know. I mean, who has the answers? Not me. Not anyone. i keep telling myself to suck it up and keep working. For what? Retirement?

Then again, I'm so worried, anxious, nervous that experiencing life feels so intense, it scares me. There's a dull comfort in having an ordinary, mapped out life.

I'm rambling. I should get back to work.

September 12, 2000
4:54 pm
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Molly
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I truly believe that the anxiety etc, will resolve when we are getting to where we want to be. I learned a long time ago, but not soon enough the value of female companions, if we look back in history the women were kept together, and the men socialized together. Dogs and cats don't party together either, how ever I am noticing some strange dynamics with my animals. I may be up against a firing range, but I don't think women were built for all this modern stress, I think we can handle the survival, but lets face it planting corn, vs job and market, I'll take the exhausting and gratifing work in the fields by the stream thank you. The other problem, is you committ to a mate, who says yea that would be nice, and he has no intention on following through or supporting that type of life style. My guy who so needs to relax, says he doesn't know how, and that the peace and quiet would kill him, well this asphalt pace is killing me , I so dislike the life style, the town, and the people are so up tight. I was in my paradice for a while and was so content, what created my problem was him, he wouldn't leave me alone, and so I came for my mate, if he would have come up, which was totally unreasonable on my part, it would have been perfect, you want to share.I wouldn't mind a woman partner at this point, not the lesbian movement which I have no problem with, but I would love to find a group of women and commune, or is that coven??????????? See I have my children, and know about marriage, I just think with a woman at this point, and heck every other point, we have more in common. Strange huh

September 14, 2000
2:18 am
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Hey! I've been feeling better. I just picked up a job. It's working at a bar, which I didnt want to do-but I've realized that I need more people interaction and this was a good way to do it. Im just afraid it will backfire because im surrounding myself with alot of people that want to party all of the time-im not much of a partier. I can hang with the best of them but not every night. I left home when I was 17 years old. Im starting to realize the importance of family now-five years later. Wierd huh? Me and my father do not have a great relationship, but my mom-who can be very negative at times towards me-is my best friend. I love her and confide in her but she does things like...ex:I just came off of Paxil, six months of bottled up emotions letting go like a flood door that just opened and I tell her that I am an emotional mess-she says "Jesus, when are you going to get a grip on life!". Being half-sarcastic, half-truth-she knows the worst things to say at the most inoportune times.

But I know, I need the female interaction-more than just my boyfriend to vent my problems to. I think I've been too busy trying to figure out myself lately that im not concentrating on the good things in life. Im using him as a crutch. I realized yesterday when I pretended that I was happy about life in general with him, I somehow felt so much better about our relationship and that made me actually happy. Im going to let go of the heavy stuff a tad, and take that to my counselor.
I've been living life to go against the grain. Who needs social cliques, cheerleading squads, rules, narrow-mindedness, going to class on a regular basis while I can sleep all of the time, live out of my car(not literally), Make fun and be envious of pretty girls on the street, I can go on...I just mean, I've become so bitter about lifes trials and tribulations and things thrown in my path that im turning into someone I dont like. I have no control over it. I always think "why cant I be normal?", when I used to think"Im not normal but thats why I like me". So I surround myself with people of the same bitter,cynical attitude as myself. My mom used to call me Pollyanna, how nothing fazed me-I want that back, even if its just a little bit. Just from my first day of work, I think its possible. I think if I can improve my self-esteem and fit in with the ways of society while still holding my individuality, than I will feel better towards everyone. I've been having so many problems for the past couple years that I've been avoiding social interactions when I used to be a social butterfly. My confidence level took a nose-dive and then I think drowned for awhile, all I can do is bring it to the surface and try some C.P.R.
Sometimes I would just like to live the simple life but know its not possible, then I think-why cant I learn the technoligically advanced stuff, so that I can work from home and with my computer in hand, move somewhere that is simple with a computer. I have three months to figure out what my next step in life is. I have a million ideas, a half-a-million I want to do NOW NOW NOW. When Im young and I have the drive and ambition...to travel, to continue in school while I know that I will. Why is it that everything requires so much money now-a-days? I have such a great business idea that would solve all my problems...does anyone know where I could get $450,000? If you think of anything let me know...
Oh, by the way-ive been thinking about becoming a lesbian(half-kidding) but my boyfriend would be pissed

September 18, 2000
10:33 am
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I have never done this before so excuse me in advance if I do something wrong. I am so unhappy and can't snap out of it - I feel that all I seem to do is have pitty partys for myself and I am the only one invited. I don't have anyone I can talk to for help and it is driving me crazy with depression. I am 31 going through a divorce (5th month), single mother of a 2 year old, I have moved in with my mother who I financially support, I work at a wonderful place but I work go home and take care of my child, my mother, the house, the yard, the bills etc... Since I left my husband I have been attending church on a regular basis and a single sunday school class. I do find some refuge there but it is so hard to get up and go by myself I don't really know anyone there and I just sit alone. I did meet someone in the class and we have been dating for a few months but, he does somethings that make me think he just wants to be with me in private and not for anyone to know. Example last sunday we had a church family picnic and the guy I am seeing come over before the picnic and we watch a movie - when it came time for the picnic he left and went on alone and said he would meet me there. When I arrived he didn't talk to me and sat with several others from the single group. When he finally talked to me it was to tell me that he was leaving. I don't know if I am super sensitive because of the neglect and unaffectionate relationship I had in my marriage or if I was meant to be by myself and take care of everyone elses needs and push mine away. I have a lot of unfair pressures placed upon me and I don't know how to deal with them. I am the sole financial support for myself, my child, my mother, I don't have a social life because of how others view that, people around me feel that they have the right to tell me how to do everything and to point out my faults, My so-called friends don't have time for me, I think I have a sign on my head that it is OK to say and do mean things to me. I am emotionally lonely and can't find anyone to help. If anyone has any ideas or just a kind word I would greatly appreciate it.

September 18, 2000
1:34 pm
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giveup
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September 18, 2000
2:18 pm
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Molly
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Lazydazy, I think the job is a good thing, it will be in a party atmosphere, and you don't have to get carried away, infact watching others, will make you not want to. I think it is great, and the money thing, lots of money out there, look up angel investors, and grants, if you want to make it happen you will. Put it out there, and work it, those actions in them selves will help to put it out where you need to be, there is no direct or painless route that I have been able to find yet. With the threads down I put some crazy resumes out there this weekend, and got responses, again I think when we are doing what we want to do, vs others, the joy follows. The lesbian thing, I can totally relate, a woman partner, who can hear, think and understand another woman, so like no more codes?????? The nuturing and compatibility, would like be nice, but I'll stick to the enemy or at least the ones with two heads, for the other stuff, if its possible.
Giveup--- your in a tough place with the baby, and living at home, and going through the woes of divorce, this too shall pass, just keep on keeping on, love your self, do exercise, yoga works wonders, for the body and the mind, take care of you and the baby, and the rest will follow. Good vibes to you today,

September 18, 2000
5:25 pm
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lazydazy
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giveup-i feel your pain chica! I think the first place we need to start is get rid of these god-awful nicknames, what is GIVEUP? LAZYDAZY? how discouraging! I think you need to try to ignore all the people that have been mean to you. They have their own insecurities-you know that, i know that! Your a rock and your strong, from just one message I can tell that about you, your just in a slump like me. I've been dealing with negativity from others all my life. I get my head way in the clouds (where i like it-thanks!) and people have to burst my bubble all of the time. Then I think back and say, anything is possible, why are they being like that! Its usually my mom, who only had one choice in her life-to become a teacher and doesnt understand the ways of the world nowadays or my boyfriend that would give anything for me to stick around him and not lose me. So next time someone says something negative to you, think of their motives and why they are saying it.

I also was depressed for awhile, I wasnt myself-i say that I was sick. I did things that werent myself, skipping classes, work, not talking to other people cause I thought they would think I was wierd, sleeping constantly-It caused people around me to think that I was a slacker-they had no respect for the way I lived my life and either did I but I had no control over it. But guess what-thats not me and I realize that now! I dont know if this has anything to do with you or not but when your in a slump you tend to behave a way thats not yourself. You know you have good things inside of you, the way you take care of others-dont neglect yourself, reward yourself for how kind and sincere you are, GIVE MORE within reason. Accentuate the positive, get rid of the negative. Is there something that you could do that would make you happy, taking up painting or something, reading? You could meet others just by doing these things. Get a meaning-less side job just so you can meet others, that way you could afford to get a baby-sitter and get a break from giving all of yourself...
oh, things are better here...im starting to enjoy life now. I still need to raise my self-esteem. My actions are so controlled, I cant let loose still. Im trying, and meeting new people. Im around people my age and its nice. I used to be so shy when I was a little girl-I didnt talk to anyone. THen my freshman year of college, I snapped out of it. The war on depression that ive been through the past couple of years has caused me to go back to the little girl I once was. Im working on it, though-sometimes I just dont have anything to say!

September 18, 2000
7:45 pm
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needfemalefriends
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September 18, 2000
7:48 pm
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needfemalefriends
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Dear females,
I do understand. The desire to become high tech literate, the desire to go to a simple life next to nature, the overwheming desire to be next to a female friend who has a fair emotional contract with me. I do understand. The desire to understand why my husband elicits fear on me. I do understand and I do need your frienship.

September 18, 2000
7:59 pm
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Molly
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we are here sister! I am truly beginning to think that most of these guys are afraide of our intelligence, and power, and rather than acknowledge and honor, and go with the growth, they try to intimidate, manipulate, and controll. Like we would find better, smarter more willing to be a partner. It is so easy to bring a sensitive trusting woman down, don't you think, its through the hard knocks that the other women have learned to lean on other women, for clarity?? Just a thought.

September 18, 2000
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September 18, 2000
10:53 pm
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manic_panic
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well, i'm sorta new to this whole thing and i don't really know what this is going to accomplish.... i just know that i really don't know who to go to for this stuff. i've been going through bouts of depression for the last 4 years. i think it might be clinical but i'm not sure. counslers have tried to put me on medication in the past but i refused, just b/c the thought of being dependant on something like that makes me scared.

i came out of highschool in a strange mental state. my parents finished a divorce. my natural father was abusive and i think he may have been clinically depressed as well although i don't know for sure if he was ever diagnosed. my step-family has been a misery.... my mother's been really unstable, going through unhappy fits because of her old and new husbands. i fell into her world and dated this guy through a lot of college who ended up being really bad for me. i lost most of my self-esteem then. a couple of other things which i don't wish to talk about quite yet happened and i haven't quite recovered. i'll go through brief periods of happiness then, all of a sudden, i'll find myself in this place that i am right now.

i catch myself thinking about everything that makes me upset and there's not much i can do about it. the thoughts rush so quickly and i get a really claustrophobic feeling in my chest. little things start to frustrate me but i feel incapable of changing things. i have body dismorphia.... i've almost cried in the morning because none of my clothes fit me right. i want to be anorexic or bulemic but i know i can't. i get so mad at myself for being unable to accomplish anything that i want to hurl myself out the window. but i know i won't. i just sit in this state of limbo. completely ineffective.

then i just want to be with someone. but i realize how lonely i am. i have "friends" but no one i feel like i can talk to. everyone hands out simple solutions: "go on medication" or "just snap out of it" or "i'm sure it's just a phase" or "life could be worse but it'll get better" which are all truisms but don't get me anywhere! i've tried counselling and they all try to attribute my unhappiness to all those past events and cross their fingers for a good will hunting moment but i don't think it's that simple. i really think i'm over much of it and yet i come back to whatever you call what i am.

the only time i'm okay is when i'm working..... just not thinking or feeling anything except following whatever protocol. can anyone tell me what is a matter with me? do i really need to be on medication? i just fear that my life is going to end up being like my father's..... pointless. and since i do want to go on living, is there a solution?

September 19, 2000
10:22 am
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Cici
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I think I have a phobia about female friends, though. I always do things to make a friendship not work. I don't call them, I don't hang out, I don't make any effort.

I had a best friend from about 4th grade until college. We were inseparable. I loved her to death. We did everything together, even lived together my sophomore year. She started acting strange, distant. I was living with my boyfriend of the time. Then while I was away with my family she slept with my boyfriend and I haven't heard from her since. I've seen her a few times, gotten a few emails which I quickly rebuffed.

She never talked to me after she did that. Ten years of being like siamese twins all went down the toilet for a penis (ha ha).

Since then I just haven't made any female friends. No friends at all, really. I have my two roomates and my fiance, all men, and my older sisters, but no new friends. I guess deep down inside I feel a lot of anger still about what she did to me. It still hurts, I still think about it even though it's been almost 2 years now. I feel inside my heart that no female is trustworthy unless she's related to me.

September 19, 2000
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Molly
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Society I think is some how to blame for that , notice how every one seems to drop out of the girl scouts at the dating age, where are the circles for women to go, where they are not competing for the Penis? sewing circles, tea parties, you know girl stuff, then the ones that get a penis, either they are afraide to leave them alone, or they don't want you out with the girls you get all fired up at those things, and come home crazy??? Women friends are different, and I guess at my age I can see the difference, there is no more competition, the guys all want young ones, at least for a little while, and we are tired of being mama.s so put your guard down, and in your school, of study, is there a women's program, perhaps you could do a thesis on this, the break down of women's connectedness. Even with Great GRam, to gram to mother to daughter, that chain is not real strong, what happened?????? Does it stem from a distrust of the mother????? Deep fun

September 19, 2000
6:01 pm
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giveup
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thanks for the response, and i agree the nicknames are discouraging but, tell how we feel at the moment. The thing I feel about being depressed is that we have the right to get angry!!!!! and let it out. My problem is that I know I am a good person but, I seem to rely on others to reinforce that to me. I feel I give and give and give and when I don't receive anything back I slip into a state of worthless. What gets me is I want to believe that there is a better life out there for me and my family but I need help sometimes and I need someone to hold me and tell me that it is going to be alright. CiCi I am right there with you on trusting girlfriends - I too have been the victim of suppling the man for a so called friend and not only once but several. I usually get along with men better. Except when it comes to a romantic relationship. Not all women are untrusting and we have to keep on trying. To me I get angry with the man because it doesn't matter who the women is because if it wasn't your friend it would be someone else. Just be thankful that you found out early enough to move on with your life.

September 20, 2000
6:58 am
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Hey all,
had to post.
it is so odd you gals, but I too am in the same boat.
I would LOVE to have more female friends right now.
it is so funny, all my life I have gotten on far better with males. But now I am just craving female friendships - which slowly I ambuilding, but isn't it odd!
Cici, I can understand with your history of females friends how you would find it hard to trust women - I too have that problem, I guess because I cannot trust my mother!
but there is a need, a void that opens up I think when we start to overcome those things, and we realise that other female platonic company is needed.
I agree with Molly to a point. Women have such amazing opportunities really - okay we have had to struggle to get back to here again, but honestly we have more pen to us that a man does. We have the chance to reproduce, or to live the mordern career woman path.
But surely each and everyone of us WOULD be happier in the more traditional role of doing our daily work outside, together with other women?
I know I would!
so Sisters! who is for a little bit of Cyber Village life. We can wash Virtual laundry in that Virtual stream over there by the Virtual mountains and have a good old natter.
Anyone wanna join me?
peace
Hazza

September 20, 2000
10:41 am
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Cici
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Definately. And since i can't drink in real life, how about sipping some virtual pina coladas in the virtual tropical paradise where virtual men do all the work, but are somehow all well-muscled and covered with baby oil. Hee hee. Matriarchy, here we come!

You know, I've always wondered why girls become super catty at puberty. All of a sudden we bring each other down instead of supporting each other, all in competition for what I realize now really isn't all that. (I love my fiance, don't get me wrong, but i know that he's definatley not the be-all-end-all of existence).

I remember in high school, girls splintering away from their groups to hang around their men and their men's friends. I've always gotten along with men better, too. Hmmm.

I like your idea Molly, of the breakdown of women's connectedness. You could observe interactinos at pubterty, in high school, as young adults and as adults in both middle-aged and post-menopasal women.

September 20, 2000
5:56 pm
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giveup
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Hello, this has been such a big help with my personal problems I didn't realize that I wasn't the only one with these feelings. OK let's get back to the well muscled, baby oiled man!!! yippeeee (oops that just slipped out) hope you all have a good night. talk to you all later.

September 20, 2000
7:53 pm
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Molly
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Eye candy huh? Years ago I think I remember the first hunka hunka man commercial where you sat pinned with your jaw hanging just like the men have for years. So gathering by at least Cici's age, it has taken one generation to turn women into voyers. Hmmmm
I wonder if the distrusting women issue is common around the world, or if it is just in the U.S. ? In my observation of other cultures, it would appear that they are more comfortable, and perhaps more stable? Are we ahead or behind in the evolution? I wonder if we are supposed to do the career path? It is a different stress, that takes away the artistic, healing, patient side of us.It seems that it renders us, needy vs nurturing ????

September 21, 2000
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giveup
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Molly, you bring up a very good point. I have been struggling with the role of the woman today. Most families must have two incomes to make it. This puts the wife/mother working 40+ hours and still has to do the housework, meals, shopping, children, husband, bills etc. We are filled with guilt that we are not being the mother that we should be. My problem was that I was the main bread winner - I supplied most of the income, insurance, got my child up and ready - packed for daycare at the crack of dawn plus get myself ready. Drive across town to the daycare, go to work 9-10 hours pick up the baby, get dinner ready, clean, dishes, laundry, get the baby bathed and put to bed, pay bills, get up throughout the night with the baby and then start the whole thing over the next day. and try to fit in grocery shopping, gifts, pets, lawn etc. Society today expects SUPERMOM and noone can do that all by themselves for very long before it all crashes down. My mothers generations says that they didn't get any help either and to suck it up. Well today women do all that plus have to work 40+ hours. Women are strong and can handle alot but, let get real. Women or Men can't do it all. Are we behind or ahead I don't know but something needs to changed.

September 25, 2000
2:10 am
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I just came to a realization, im gaining my confidence back and its changing my views on people. For awhile I would sit back and find faults with everyone. Now im sitting here feeling a little more confident and actually liking people, even with their faults. It all comes down to me feeling so insecure about myself that I became the catty girl. Something that i've known all along but now realize that the people I dont like-the girls that sit in a corner and talk shit about everyone walking past, really have severe insecurities. And who gives a shit about what they say, anyways? I just wish I could meet some less judgemental people in my life.
Including myself.
I'm glad this started, I need to throw ideas out there and know that there are people out there listening and possibly feeling the same way. Go cybersisters!
I'm in a relationship that is lacking passion. He is a great guy, does alot for me. But Im just missing something. I want prince-charming. He's more like the peasant next door. I love him I just wish sparks would fly. We've been going out a long time. I'm starting to realize that he is depressed. I like to go out and have fun-im realizing i need to experience life instead of sitting at home and sulking. I've gone out every night this past week, without him, maybe now im taking it to the extreme but I feel its me! He wants to sit home. Lately, Ive been looking at other people wondering"what if?". I just want that high from someone, for them to adore me. Since ive been depressed, i feel like i messed that chance all up. LIke-he cant look at me that way, i feel too vulnerable...Its not as much a physical thing as, what would it be like to go out with that person and possibly lead to other things. I wish we could break up for a week and I could see if I liked things and we could continue back together but thats not fair to him. I'm afraid we will break up and I will realize how much he means to me and he might not take me back. I'm not afraid of being alone but I am afraid of not having him in my life.

September 25, 2000
12:49 pm
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Cici
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I read an article about two-income families. It was a breakdown of an accountant's analysis of expenditure versus income.

Apparently, according to this guy, with a family of four, when you include daycare, eating out, car maintenece and gas mileage of two cars, drycleaning bills, and housecleaning, the income of a two-income family versus a one-income family where one parent stays at home is only about $5.00/day difference.

My Dad stayed home to take care of me when i was little because he has health problems and was retired. I loved getting picked up from school, always having someone home to pick me up if I got sick, having my breakfast made for me (bacon and eggs or hot cereal every morning). It was very comforting.

Who says the woman has to stay home? But who says she can't? My fiance and I tlaked it over and agreed because of my health problems that I would work part-time and he would work full-time. It seems even to me. He still does all the outside work (pool, yard)and the dishes (ha ha).

September 25, 2000
6:26 pm
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Molly
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Some times I feel like we have all been the victims of some ones theisis paper, like what would happen if we made all the mom's work, we could increase our income base, make employment through, attourneys, new marriage,fast food, diet centers, clothing, attourneys, day care, social services, the law enforcement, cuz the kids have no one in charge, and hey look at all the taxes we are getting and all the jobs we created. Looking over the last 30 years, look at all the jobs that got created just because mothers work, and look what has happened to marriage, family, and the kids. Remember the commercial years ago, maybe decades ago, it was in the 80's that said women go to work, you don't need to put up with this , get independent, well how in a quest for independence did we get so friggin stuck??????Not to mention sick and tired, we are not supposed to be doing it all, and CiCi, I think it is great that you are figuring on working part time, that is the way it should be. I have been home with 2 dogs, and it is still hard to run a house!!!! I went to work today for the first time in months, and it is a mess, I am looking at my earnings, and what it is going to cost, and to be frank am I crazy???????? My work expenses will take up 1/2 of my pay, house cleaner, car payment ins, food, clothes, My puppy had an anxiety attack and destroyed the front yard, my spouse, had his sleep disturbed, and am I in the mood to fix dinner, heck no. Then there is the other pay check which will go to taxes, it sucks.

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