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the new start was his new identity???
August 10, 2007
4:39 pm
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Zinnie
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Lala,

If you like, I can post the story about what happened to my daughter. I will have to find it here on a old thread and copy it to this one.

BUT, the point I'm trying to make - even if you do love it? There are 48/49 other states that you can live in, and still find agreeable work, and even an agreeable life.

I'm going to post my daughters story for you here on this thread. Now, please keep in mind that she moved from one end of the country to another to get away from this guy. He waited. He laid in waiting for her - and six months later? He got her. The paramedics when they rolled up on her? They thought she was dead. She still will spend 60-75% of her life in wheelchair.

Z.

August 10, 2007
4:57 pm
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Zinnie
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O.K. - heere is two different posts I made a few years back regarding my child and what happened to her.

Let me also tell you - she just went through another spinal fusion surgery, and is back in rehap four to six hours a day.

Don't become another number. No parent should ever have to see their child through this, nor pick out a casket.

Z.
____________________________________

Zinnie
5-Feb-04

Hi All,
It seems like in the last month, we have had all kinds of posts from newcomers regarding being in a abusive situation. People stay for many reasons. Financial, fear of living a different type of life, wanting the children to have two parents right there, not wanting to be alone - and what they have is better than nothing, right? And the resounding "he/she said they were sorry, and I felt badly for them."

I have never felt abuse was O.K. - any kind of abuse, physical, mental, emotional, verbal, sexual - none is ever O.K. I have posted all of this on a few threads, and wanted for anyone who would like to to read about this. This is a little different from the other threads, because I'm going in to deeper detail. The reason I do this is because I want all of you - those that are in abusive relationships and will not get out to read this, and see where you very well could be headed.

Please, please, please - read through this, and think and I mean really think about your relationship. Not the sugar coated version you try to believe, but the version that really is.

As I have said numerous times, my child is very real. What happened to her was very real, what can happen to you is real as well. I have heard two or three people say that they have "won this round of the game." This is not a game folks, this is your life. We have only really a very few days in our lives in the big scheme of things. By wasting our time and engery on these people, and constantly forgiving them, taking them back and then replaying the cycle we are only wasting even more time. Our time here is really short - and for all the time we spend worrying about cracking the eggshells we walk on, and not living to the best of our ability, the more we lose. We CANNOT get those days back.

So, here goes - again bear with me, because I now this is long, and I know that some of you have already read this, or have only read parts because it's on different places. So here it is again, and I have added some things.

Away I go!

I guess my biggest question is why do you feel you need "someone to tell you to leave?"

If you are that unhappy, and he is that abusive - and he is. I mean what the hell? Are you going to let him slam your arms, legs, finger in doors - and possibly break them? Let him shove you so hard you fall and crack your tailbone, slam you so hard into the wall that you break your nose, but then say "but, he did not make a fist and hit me?" You know what, I guess after reading this - I realize my daughters ex-boyfriend technically did not "hit" her either when he attacked her. But, she has been in the hospital for over a year, and has another year to go.

I know I'm sounding like a broken record here... but, I am really feeling lately that I need to make other people aware of abuse and if they can get out to get out. If I can stop another person from being hurt like my daughter was hurt... I will.

I will find where I posted to Aces what happened, and will post it here. Please read it. Please learn from it. My new cause is "I don't want to read about another statistic." I'm beginning to feel as if I have a calling for this.

Zinnie 4-Feb-04

LCV and anyone else in this situation,

Please read this - also know that this animal knew exactly when to attack. He went after her right after her sister was killed last year, and he knew she would not be overly alert. How do I know this? The one that did cooperate with the Prosecution (he got 22 years vs. the 30 years), told the Court that the the boyfriend had laughed about it saying she would be "easy pickins."

The extent of Lisa's injuries?

First of all, let me state that Lisa is a small girl. She is only about 5'3, and 105 lbs. soaking wet. She was attacked by three "men" all of who were at least 5'11 and weighing in at least 180 lbs.

Lisa was gang raped by all three, and sodomized. They did reconstructive surgery on her vagina and anus. She will never be able to have children, because this also resulted in a hysterectomy. She was stabbed over 30 times, with several of the stab wounds piercing her uterous - which lead to the hysterectomy. Her right leg was broken, and her left leg and hip was shattered. She had to have a hip replacement, and if not for the recent changes in electronic pulse implants she would have been in a wheel chair. As it is, she will never walk again unaided. She had two broken arms, seven broken fingers. She lost some of the vision in her left eye, and the brow bone was broken requiring two plastic surgeries to correct. She lost 75% of her hearing in her left ear, and she is a musician, so this will affect her way of making a living. She has just a hearing implant put in, and we are seeing improvement. She also has had some loss of vision in her left eye, and we don't know if that can be corrected. She was left with brain damage, and is having to relearn how to do things; eating, using the bathroom, even speach. She says things backwards or will forget which language she is speaking and will switch in the middle of a conversation. This was a result of being kicked viciously in the head several times and she suffered two strokes.

My child is 26 years old. The people that pulled over when they saw her lying on the side of the road thought she was dead. Thank God they stopped when they saw her and thank God that she is as strong willed as she is. Why? Her car was left about 35 feet from the highway, she managed to drag herself with one arm to the side of the highway before she fell unconscious. The EMT's did not expect her to make it to the hospital. She was so traumatized that she could not and would not say one single word for over a month.

She has been so down a three diffent times that she had talked suicide. You have never seen people get on a plane so fast when she told us that. I dropped everything and flew up there right away. She spends six hours a day in rehab. She has had many surgeries, over 10 now (I would have to look at the calander to see exactly how many), and was in the hospital for nine months before she was well enough to be moved closer to home. Do you think she was able to just take a commercial flight? No. We had to hire a charter ambulatory plane to move her to this new rehab hospital. She will be in there for a minimum of another year.

But, here she is - doing the best that she can each and every day. She is in physical rehab for close to six hours per day. She has group counseling, individual counseling, and a rape crises group to attend. She is a very gifted artist and musician. She will play a song for anyone who would like her to. She has spent lots of time down in the Pediatric Ward - drawing pictures for the kids, and teaching them to draw. She even helped the kids making puppets so they could put on a "puppet show" for their parents.

She is very real, and very personal - well at least to us. To the court and the rest of the world what was it? Just another crime statistic. No more, no less.

Him? His Mommy and fiance wrote to all of us to ask if we would sign off on paperwork so he could get "help" - and lessen his prison term. NO!

He also just married this woman, who sat there crying about how all of this was a "terrible mis-understanding, and it's not fair that he is in prison now for son long."

My child? Was in her own mental hell which is a prison, and will always have a part of this in her life. Even after all of this - over Christmas she did say "well, I got the nose job I always wanted. She greets each day with a smile, and says "I can do it."

Please - don't make yourself another statistic just because you "don't want to make him mad."

Zinnie

August 11, 2007
6:00 am
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lalasgirl
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zinnie,

no this isn't a game. it is real. i am so sorry to hear about your daughter. i have daughters 24,20,& 17. my heart goes out to you and her.

i am taking this all very seriously. i know i am already another statistic and don't want to add to the percentage. my spouse is already threatening to have all his friends know that i am his enemy and to take care of me somehow someway someday. those are chilling words to hear...but zinnie where do i run? where will i ever be safe? even when i am hyper alert i still watch over my shoulder.

one thing did happen to my ex in jail that was amazing. he got badly beat up and was in many fights. he wasn't the big bad man in there. he got a bit back of what he gives. it victimized him and scared him and he doesn't want anymore of that. funny? no...appropriate...maybe.....but i think it is the old adage..."what goes around comes around"...he states he doesn't want to go back there at all....doesn't want to be hurt. isn't that rich? but yet he bully's me still by threatening his many friends....i just don't know how or where to run from people i don't know. please understand i know the urgency of being safe....but how do you stay safe when you don't know the extent of who you are staying safe from? he has a network of inclandestine friends...all over...in my case it would be..."you can run but you can't hide". and zinnie...i know there are many places to go but bad follows you no matter what when it wants to. just like you said...when a family member dies the bad seeds know of your return and lay in wait for your return. being alone is more threatening to me. running out of the sight of those that care scares me.

i will pray for your daughter. i need her first name only so i can ask for a total healing to come to her. i feel through her pain and suffering comes knowledge and light and a gain of insight of just how bad ....bad can get.

thanks for sharing this episode of horrible with me. it makes me very aware that life is sweet and short and i must be happy for each moment given. i will stay out of harms way the best i can....but i still feel staying in and around many that know the case is my best bet...going out of the watchful eye of the sheriff's scares me more.
to go to a new area makes me vunerable; to stay in clear view of everyone makes more sense to me. i am in a very small community and my art center is right next to the sheriff's dept., the sheriffs patrol my area heavy...i keep my phone right next to me always. my neighbors are all instructed that if they see him or anyone strange come to my door to call 911 no questions asked! it is vigilent it is secure...the locks are re-keyed and isn't it hell that i made the mistake of marrying this man. made the mistake of forgiving him and letting him back in the first time....these are my errors...i am accountable for my life and now i must do the best i can for me. and i am. i am in a cocoon right here...safe as safe can be. to leave isn't safe for no one will be watching but me. i have extra eyes here.

love to you & I appreciate your daughter for the lovely woman that she is and what happened to her is so awful...it serves a purpose in my life to hear about hers. thanks.

August 11, 2007
9:13 am
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lala -

Two suggestions:

Last year, my older son signed me up for a police course in handguns. I completed the course and qualified for a Concealed Weapons License. I now have a .38 which is either in my glove compartment, on my person or on my nightstand at all times. And I know how to use it, legally and competently. Would I call 911 first? Yes...but then I would have a means to save myself, while awaiting the patrol car's arrival.

Second suggestion: sign up for a police sponsored "R.A.D." course. These are offered free all over the United States. R.A.D. stands for "Rape-Aggression-Defense" and consists of a nine-hour course in self-defense for women, only. (Men are not allowed to observe -- or participate in -- these classes. I am 57 and not in the greatest physical shape, but I completed this simple course. Today, I could take down/fight off 2-3 men, bigger & taller than I am, were they to try and jump or assault me. All it takes is the right technique.

Both of these skills have given me greater confidence in my ability to protect myself. I can -- and I will. Please give them some thought.

Again, these are police-sponsored and instructed programs. I believe guns must be handled very responsibly and professionally. Also, self-defense is crucial for all women, even young girls. I wish it was taught in the schools, but can't be legally, since the "boys" are excluded.

My best to you...

- Ma Strong

August 11, 2007
2:21 pm
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Zinnie
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I am running short on time, so this will be a short post. My spouse among other things is a SWAT instructor.

My daughter was well aware on how to take care of herself - however, a 5'3 - by the way, now 5'1 1/2 person who is 100 lbs. is no match for three men over six feet, 200 lbs., weilding knives.

Where do you go? That I cannot answer you - but, I would strongly suggest away from where you are now, do not forward your mail, and make sure you do not contact those that know you both. It is only one slip up by a friend - that is how this guy found my Lisa.

By the way, life will go on - Lisa? Won an award winning number of Grammy's last year for her supporting music work, is running a foundation to help other women like her in Cananda, and CAN NOT BE STOPPED.

Him? He relies on his Mommy still...

What a guy.

Oh, and the stuff happening to him in prison? Sounds to me like you are still in touch with him, and he is pulling on your heartstrings - because now that this happened to him, he will not do the same right? Wrong - he will.

Be safe.

Z.

August 12, 2007
8:15 pm
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zinnie and strong,

thanks...yeah...he calls through a private number....i answer all calls since my mom is in hospice care as of this past week. i have to know who is calling just in case i need to hop a plane faster than what i have booked for this week to go north.

i should hang up...i know....but it is that longing to hear the sorry side...which isn't there....he just accuses me of not helping him out of this...all my fault stuff.....enough of all that. i know what i need to do and that is stand firm and know i had nothing to do with his misfortune with the court. he was the one that was the big tough guy with his wife. the man that played gangster games and got caught. yeah, okay...caught because i answered the sheriff's questions with honesty (they already knew he was false and i think testing me to see if i was in on it...which i'm not) i did gripe up a storm about all of it...i was not nice to him about his falsehood and i will use the word HATED it and let him know it.....he was dishonest and i told on him. he wants me to feel guilty for that...and i wish i would have kept my mouth shut. but i wanted to tell....isn't that crazy on my part. i wanted out of the lie that he played into...i wanted out and told on him about his false identity. okay...so maybe it was my fault he got caught...maybe i am to blame for that part...but i never forced him to go do that i.d. deception to begin with...i just disagreed with it and we fought about that. ugh. enough explanation...i wish my heart would hurry up and start to heal. this part of the plan is torture not to be with the dream love you thought was real...(play on words there eh?) help me GOD to get over him and to get past all of this heart ache.

one more reason i treat him okay on the phone is...I'm scared of making him any more mad at me than he already is. it isn't a pleasant place for me living on this fence.

the defense courses sound good actually. for anyone and any reason really. i am 52 and should know how to help defend myself at least a little. not being all alone is the first defense....not taking chances is my second...knowing who is around me and beyond is my next defense. a gun is only as good as its user. i could see someone taking it away from me and using it against me. hopefully, the rad classes address that possibility. guns are good...i did go look at some and saw them to be costly....over $300 or so.....

congrats on the daughter and her accomplishments...that is grand and appropriate for her to achieve such status. yeah to her and applause to her spirit.

i'm trying and working within my own skin...i'm not a perfect battered spouse. i relapse and let my heart start thinking....now that is stinking thinking...just like the alcoholic....i need to insert his name in the 12 step rules for myself.

August 13, 2007
2:42 pm
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Zinnie
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Lala!!!!

Come on now... ALL calls from jail are collect, so you have to be accepting these charges.

You have to pick up all calls? Pay the extra $2.00 per month for caller I.D.

Keep making these excuses for him - after all you only stand to lose your life.

Honey, see it for what it's worth and do what you need to do for your family.

Z.

August 13, 2007
2:49 pm
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Zinnie
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By the way... a friend of mine said to me yesterday "Zinnie, not everyone can be like you and make definite decisons and stick to them - they have to sit on the fence."

My reply?

If you sit on the fence and do nothing, you will only end up with an ass full of splinters, and still nothing gets done.

I'm sorry to sound so hard, but, Lala, you are perpetuating this. You did not cause him these problems and it is certainly not your job to fix them. You job is to take care of you and your daughters.

No more and no less.

Z.

August 13, 2007
3:38 pm
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zinnie.

oh i see what you are thinking...yeah he went to jail...but his boss had the cash to bond him out....so there are no phone calls from jail since he is out on bond.... just private numbers coming through...and sometimes they are him. i am hanging up now...but those first few calls i was taken back. was still heartsick and just wanted to hear that voice...and then what i heard it say was mean and cruel things to pull me back down into despair and hurt and harms way....just as you stated...

yep, i won't argue...i perpetuated things by allowing him to talk when he finally got in touch with me thinking i would hear that he was totally wrong but he insists that i am to blame. so when the private numbers come in i do not answer them anymore. i have learned this lesson overnight. i get a message if it is family calling from the nursing home. and NO message when it must have been him again.

i must not be weak. i'm listening zinnie...you are making rational logical sense...my heart thought that it was going to be saved by the man i dreamed he was....OOOOOPs upside my head!!! i must have been lost in a dreamworld on that thought.

so....i have made a pact with myself. BE DONE...GET OVER IT...GET ON TO A BETTER LIFE> thanks for taking the hard line with me. i needed it. my ass will be splinter free thanks to your no nonsense attitude and my NO picking up of the phone.

next step for me is to contact the sheriff and report the violation of no contact. i'm working up to that one...being frightened of a bully sucks. but being six feet under sucks even more. again thanks...it takes my head a moment to over-ride my heart.

August 13, 2007
7:53 pm
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i re-read my posts and i truly see how damaged i am. thank the good Lord for counseling, all of you, my family and friends.

August 13, 2007
8:27 pm
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fantas
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Lalasgirl,

You are well on your way to healing yourself. Stay away from this jack ass. Let the law deal with him. Your dream love is nothing but a common criminal. You are fortunate to have figured all this out now before you were completely sucked further into his webs.

You deserve to be with a law abiding, kind, generous man, who will protect you not get you in trouble. You sound like such a giving and loving person to me.

btw, have you always enjoyed living life on the edge? Just curious. This might mean you are really fun person to be around...

August 13, 2007
9:41 pm
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i'm getting back to being me...took a detour. went left of center and took a wrong turn. i don't drive 55 and i'm more of an artist than anything. i see things for what they could be and not what they are...if that makes me fun than i guess so. i have always been a gypsy personality enjoying everyone and everything as they are...just my special husband someone had another identity. i wasn't prepared for what it did to my trusting center. i find it hard to open up like i used to so it has taken some of my fun away.

August 14, 2007
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Zinnie
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Hi Lala,

Honey... the impact of me being tough is having a daughter that is tougher, and you will be too eventually. By taking the hard line, you will also be imparting the knowledge to your own children "I don't deserve this." Which neither you nor they do - or anyone for that matter.

I have been happily re-married for 17 years. My first husband died 20 yrs. ago. There is something that I have learned in this long lesson called life - and I must impart it to you because of something you said above. You stated that you wanted your heart to be saved by the man that you love. Honey, man or not, love them or not - only YOU can save your own heart.

Keep strong.

Z.

August 14, 2007
3:14 pm
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August 14, 2007
3:26 pm
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z,

man, are u batting 1000? everything you say is right on...are you a counselor in diguise?

i'm getting ready to leave and go back north for a moment (2 weeks), see my mom clean out my junk sell stuff. while up there and starting today i will start to mend my heart. it is so broken. save it for myself as you say.

he still calls from private numbers and i have let many calls unanswered but last eve i just picked it up not thinking andit was him. i never said a word but heard him sloshy drunk telling me how much he loved me, that he didn't deserve t go to jail, that he loved me. i still didn't speak...but i did something worse i listened. why couldn't i hang up...silently i listened....it is half of me yearning to hear or do i just want him to gravel...is it because of me not wanting to make him mad i don't hang up or is it because for some stupid reason i am not mad enought. ambivilent is a good word for me. after he rambled in his stupor he hung up....

even though i picked it up i still didn't communicate...i thought...but him knowing it was me listening gave him power against my spirit....i have to stop hearing what i want to hear and remember what was said when he was being in his cruel cycle....i say cycle because he thinks he is in the honeymoon stage and i'm numb and dead to this. but why do i stand like my feet are in cement? i feel like a total screw up having been with him. i feel like such a failure having lost him???? i'm out there....today it has been a full month that he has been gone physically...but my mind hasn't deposited him in the trash where he belongs. he is still in the cupboard of my soul.

too bad it couldn't be as easy as the old movie south pacific and i could wash that man right out of my hair.

August 16, 2007
5:45 pm
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Zinnie
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Hi Lala,

Call the phone company and tell them you are being harrassed - they will change your number for free. Then give only the hospice your new number.

Z.

August 21, 2007
7:24 pm
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hey z,

go the information you sent about numbers.

since i have been gone i have not been home to get the phone calls. it has been a reprieve to say the least....i welcome the alone time up here at night at my mom's old house. good memories here to take me to the morrow. no phone...just my cell and i got a new number on that one too.

i'm doing better with my thinking. i only think of him 1/2 the day...so i am doing better...LOL..too busy with helping with my mom to dwell in despair and misery over that fool..

i have much to do when i get home and changing the number will be on the priority list.

August 22, 2007
6:20 pm
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Zinnie
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Hey Lala,

I'm traveling right now so it is hard for me to check the board... but, I will look to see if I can find an old posting I have here - guaranteed to help you stop thinking about him.

Let me see if I can find it, and I will post it to you...

If not, I will type it all back out - but, right now I have to run.

Take care of YOU.

Z.

August 22, 2007
8:50 pm
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lalasgirl
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Z.

i am taking care ....and getting things done. this is good for me. but i still need help and i'm not too proud to think i don't....help any way you can...i need to rid my thoughts of him....please help. i welcome criticism at this point to help me knock some sense into my skull.

he has used and abused and i don't like it any more. but i still find myself thinking of him....just the same.

i am on the road too. so i don't get in as often either. had the wifi up today.

August 23, 2007
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_anonymous
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lala- The process of divorce takes time. And a lot of it. What happens is the new positive things in your life will gradually replace the old negative things. It is Ok to think about him. But for every thought you have of him, try to think of one positive one. I think about my husband. He had been in my life for a long time. Long before we had gotten married. His daughter grew up with my sons. I raised one of his girls before I even had a relationship with him. Some history there. So, there are things I learned from him and like about him, but I realize that he is not husband or relationship material.

August 23, 2007
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so glad you stopped by....yeah my old man already has a new woman....he knew the gig was up with me so he moved forward too.....but there is still court between us....criminal and then divorce....i hear a jail house divorce is free? is that true? i have to check with legal advice on that....

August 25, 2007
7:13 pm
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Zinnie
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Probably easier to type it out then look for it...

Anyway first of all, in many states "jail house" divorces are free in the fact that you only have to pay for the filing (you can do it yourself), and it will generally be granted right away. A friend of mine here in Texas, when her husband went to prison, she filed the paperwork herself, they had no property to divide and the Judge saw her that day and granted it for her. It only cost her the actual court cost of filing.

Anyway - here is my method... think of what you want or where you want to be or have accomplished six months from now - something that does not include him. I mean, what books to you want to have read? Where do you wish to have visited? Anything - make it pleasant thoughts. Then you take a rubber band - just a plain rubber band that you can find in any office or home and put it around your wrist. Every time you think about him, SNAP that rubberband hard - and STOP thinking about him and think of your goal - the what you want to have accomplished or changed. It hurts, and it really does SNAP you back into reality. After a week or so, all of the sudden you will realize you are not thinking of him very often and when you do? You will automatically begin to think of something more positive.

Another thought to ponder? What in the hell is this new woman of his thinking being with him if he is spending all of his free time stalking you? Poor kid - makes me feel for her to.

Take care of yourself.

Z.

August 25, 2007
7:39 pm
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lala- OMG. When did he find someone else? Was this before he got arrested or afterwards? When he found out he couldnt con you into recanting your story he thought he would try to pressure you by finding someone else. You poor thing. Didnt you say he is a fugitive? Was he out on bail? When is his next court date? How are you feeling now? I know you loved him. Just call the courts. I am sure you can do an IN Pro-per divorce with no lawyer. Find out if you can get a fee waiver. So you dont have to pay for the costs. I never heard of a jail house divorce. This site is the first time.

August 25, 2007
10:35 pm
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lalasgirl
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September 30, 2010
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i know i am hurting. that is all i know.
when he called my home private number, he would tell me to callhim.....and then i would and he would say call back in about 20 minutes.

he has privately called my cell and told me to call him......cause he couldn't call me. so then he would want me to call him. he told me to fix all of the court charges on him that i have him on...i told him i didn't file anything against him the state picked it up....i guess i should be pressing charges but i don't want to play any games with him......cause he will win.

..and until i fixed his charges we couldn't be together....so he really doesn't want to be with me; i can't fix anything i did try...but it makes me feel bad as he was in trouble because of something he did to me.....i felt like i was saying: "yeah go ahead and use me i will help you get out of it"...and that is what i did by calling him back......he is using me and i am letting him and he is hurting me by acting like he has someone else in his life...that i have been replaced as he always bragged about... whether he does or not i have no idea. my intuition and gut says he played a good show last night and wanted to hurt me and enjoyed it.

and then he kept having me call him back yesterday....and when he talked with me he wanted me to know he was freshly shaven, getting ready to go in and watch the football game, and then he said "wait, let me see if this is right?" and you could hear him put the phone down and he was talking about putting on his old spice"""

he had rejected me sexually (that hurt) and for him to talk about shaving which meant sex with us, and then i knew he wanted to hurt me when he put on the old spice over the phone. and then he said don't call back....(AFTER HE KEPT CALLING Me to call him).

I have to realize that he doesn't want me...or love me.
i have to stop calling...which i have since that time.

i guess that was the emotional punch i needed to stop wishing for something that just isn't going to be.

i make no sense. but i really thought i wanted him until last night....i thought he was honeymooning with me over the phone

but he was building me up as the good friend he lost because we married??? that a good friend wouldn't do this to him, that i was the only one that could help him out of this court hearing...

that he would have never called the police on me for any reason. not even if he saw me holding the smoking gun. HE WOULD NEVER have called the police on me.

before we left our home state, he pressured me to hurriedly file papers saying i wanted the cpo to be dropped. i did exactly that.wrote a great letter of how i thought we could make it with a new fresh start and counseling..i even notorized the paperwork filed in the court to drop the cpo......he was in a rush to get to the new state...we had to hurry and leave...right now....so i left with him as not to be without him.....( i did file the paperwork thinking that it was dismissed on my asking)....it wasn't....and they have my spouse on fugitve charges from our old state since the magistrate didn't okay my request for dropping a 5 year cpo.

so yeah fugitive charges, fraud and domestic....he is out on bail. i will look into divorce options. no reason to hang on to my love for him...so that is the hard part. i'm abusing myself by wanting somene that truly has made it clear he will even go to jail to get away from me...right after he doesn't get the response he wants from me about fixing his court stuff. i keep telling him i can't.....

and i am hurting over the sexually inuendos he threw at me last night and then said Don't call back...like he need privacy and was ready to rock and roll......it hurt me...i have to quit this....i'm hurting myself.

my fault for calling him back.

August 25, 2007
10:54 pm
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_anonymous
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LALA- OMG!! You poor sweet person. He is doing nothing more than trying to pressure you to con you into dropping charges. The only thing he cares about is not getting convicted. He is in the self perserving mode. Because you are not caving in he is trying to degrade you and humiliate you to get revenge. You cannot allow him to speak to you anymore. Everytime you talk to him he will zing you with an insult. Just to break you down so that he can get control over you. Everytime you respond to him you are giving him narcissitic supply and power. Not allowing him to contact you gives you the power to say NO MORE! Dont respond to his voice mails and texts and make a police report. Hope BIG BUBBA likes his old spice.

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