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The man I love---married and an addict
September 25, 2001
11:54 pm
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suds
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September 24, 2010
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I had a beautiful relationship with a married man for almost two years. He's being married is part of the problem but not the biggest part. He is a relationship/love addict. He's undergoing a program just like AA and moving on, healing, recovering with great difficulty. My love for him required me to let him go and heal not so much for his family or for me or for society but for himself.Anybody out there who are in their own healing process, trying to get out of codependency, or who are in some way similar to my situation...please do share your insights. It is a blessing really that I found this site...hoping that in my own healing, i can get inpiration from others and hopefully inspire others. Most of my "healing companions" as i call them, where I draw strength and faith, are from the wondeful words of AA. Addiction (may it be drugs, alcohol, food, sex, love, etc.)follows the same 12-step and and people who are healing (the addicts and codependents alike)draw inspiration from basically the same words shared by AA.

September 26, 2001
12:51 pm
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pam g fu
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September 24, 2010
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which is one day at a time and the serenity prayer God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change and the courage to change the things I can and wisdom to know the difference.

September 26, 2001
2:11 pm
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Molly
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September 30, 2010
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Letting go with love is a big lesson in self love. keep on keeping on.

September 28, 2001
12:33 pm
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dyingsoon
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No one on earth would believe the following matter. For sure whoever knows this will think I am mentally ill or psychological sick. I have been married for many many years and unexpectedly fell in love with an innocent girl. The girl is so crazy about me and is willing to marry me as second wife. I went home and asked my wife regarding this matter. Before that I did some research that polygamy is possible, and there are many similar cases out there. I was boldly and crazily to do such thing. It's dilemma. I am very greedy in love. I want my wife and that girl at the same time. Am I sick in mind? I really want them both. My wife wants me stop seeing her. Right now the girl and I are suffering from depression simultaneously. We couldn't let it go. Why I cannot love two wemen at the same time? Both of them are really nice and crazy about me, but my wife did not agree this affair at all. What happened has happened? It's all my fault. I blame myself that I am ruining her life. If I leave the girl, she might die soon. She gave me everything. She came from Asian still with strong traditional concept that whoever touched her would be her husband forever. My God! What have I done? I know this is all my fault. I should not hold her in the first place. I have no right to ask anyone to forgive my sin. Up to this moment I really don't know what to do. I couldn't eat. I couldn't sleep well. I couldn't study. I couldn't think. I totally lost myself. Life has to be this way. I am playing the dangerous game to myself. I did this without conscience. Damn me. Damn me. I made the girl suffering and dropped out of school. She said it's too painful. She almost couldn't take it any more. God help me. No, God punish me for what I have done something bad to an innocent girl. I really lost and don't know what to do. All the this I could not talk to my wife. 100% she won't listen to this because it's alreay my fault. What should I do now? What should I do?

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