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Talking to mom again
November 14, 2006
5:03 am
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sis_who_got_help
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September 30, 2010
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So I let my mom come over this weekend to spend time with my kids. I almost got sucked into the drama (brother is back with his wife for now since girlfriend miscarried, I think brother is only doing it for a place to stay) But I told her that I cannot have that kind of poison in my house and asked her not to even answer her cell phone if it was my brother, his girlfriend or his wife while she was there. She didn't listen of course, but she stopped talking about it when I told her I wasn't interested in hearing any of it. So, we're trying to reestablish some kind of relationship. It's exhausting trying to get her to stay within my boundries, and she keeps trying to get me to help my brothers and my one brother's kids. I have helped them tremendously and I'm just tired of it. All it does is free up more of his money to do drugs. So I said no. She wasn't happy but I told her she needed to home at that point. She called later that night to apologize, half heartedly. I accepted just as half heartedly. Life goes on.

November 14, 2006
6:50 pm
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lovetocrochet
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Sounds like you handled it well. I'm proud of you!

November 15, 2006
1:32 pm
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garfield9547
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Well done.

You set your boundries and i know how difficult is must of been for you.

I broke contact with my mother long ago (emotionally)

Still to this day she exhausts me if i get into any kind of contact with her. It's just not worth my while.

stay strong as you are. You have changed yourself. You will NEVER be able to change your mother and you realise that. I can see that in your actions.

Well Done Again

Garfield

November 15, 2006
3:05 pm
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atalose
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very good job, that's what boundaries are all about, setting them and sticking to them even if those around us won't. It may take your mom a while to catch on to the fact she is not going to wear you down so she'll stop.
I went through this with my mom and all it took was strong will on my part, not caving in at all and soon she stopped her behavior.
We set others behavior towards us, like you said you helped your brothers in the past and his kids so that is what your mom is going to keep expecting you do to until your new boundaries sinks in to her.

Atalose

~~Hope has a place, but not above reality~~

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