Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
Taking Care of Myself - part 2
January 18, 2005
11:18 am
Avatar
mj
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Welcome 🙂
Yes I agree!
Today I am working on taking care of myself. That's a big job.
Hope You find the support that we are so accustomed to enjoying here.

January 18, 2005
4:22 pm
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hello mj thanks for responding this is a great sight to post. It helps to be around postive people and to be able to share. My day has gone well. My son is 23 years old and as far as I know is not doing drugs at the time. However he still has lots of the behaviors and attitudes. I have really had to keep the focus on me latley and sometimes it is difficult. I have a practice that I do when things are stressful I bring myself back to the moment. What am I doing right now. This may sound weird but it helps me to focus better in lots of other ways. If I am thinking of one thing and doing another I am not living in the moment and sometimes those moments are when I can get all bent out of shape. I don't care if I am mopping the floor, I say to myself right now you are mopping the floor etc. I would like other ideas if anyone wants to share. Thanks I have been in a program for 1 1/2 years and it seems it has just began to sink in. I am 45 oooooooooooow. Lots of love

January 18, 2005
4:54 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hey guys nice to here from you both and welcome day1..yes this is a safe place to let over feelings out..and express ourselves..I'm doing ok today been busy here at work..it helps my day go by faster..been trying to stay focused..let things go..it's not easy..I will continue to pray..I plan on going home and getting some rest I feel a little tired today..I just want to have some peace of mind and not worry about things I cannot change..just for today I will have a program I may not follow it exactly but I will have it..Angel1

January 18, 2005
4:55 pm
Avatar
mj
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I like that. Being in the moment, be it mopping floors or whatever. By George you got it. Stay focussed on the moment task and the rest just takes care of itself.

I am 47. I like where I am at today!
I have two adult married daughters who live in different states and 5 grandchildren.

January 19, 2005
8:59 am
Avatar
mj
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Angel....How are you doing today?
Going to my meeting today! I love Al-Anon. I have been going for over 2 years now. I have to share what happened with the Coda meeting.

After the incident I shared where the person yelled and swore at me and my counselor advised I stay away.....

My sponsor suggested she go back with me so that we could give a positive example to any newcomers in the program. I agreed a little hesitantly at first. When we went last Thursday.....the founders had decided to end the meeting so some of us are going to keep it going. Now that was a Spiritual Moment for me. If I keep doing the work, Good things happen.

Have a Great Day everyone!

January 19, 2005
2:12 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

That's is very true good things will happen..I to have had many blessings since I've been in Al-anon..I have been in program since 1991 and it's been a very slow process for me I have alot of trust issues so it has taken me time to really see results in my recovery..it's been in very small steps..I continue to go to meetings because I know how I have been affected by this disease..I understand that I need help and
Al-anon is a safe place to go..I don't do as much service work as I should..that's one reason my progress is slow..during my recovery I have had some set-backs and it has caused me to move slow but I continue to go to meeting because I do know that is works..regardless of lifes ups and downs..there have been many times I just wanted to stop going to meetings and just give up..but I believe in recovery I have seen the results when I do my part..so I will continue to work on me and pray I to get better...Angel1

January 19, 2005
4:11 pm
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi to both of you. Things have been good for me today. Meditated some today on my shortcomings and how I might do the footwork to change them. Changing myself is not easy after years of being a certain way but its an adventure. I have found if I am willing I will be led in the directiion I need to go. I have to be willing and like I said change is hard but fun. Growing up we were not allowed to express our opinions so I learned to go overboard with it, but I have learned listening and learning is an important flip side I missed out on too. Home was do it now no questions ask hm that is not good for me either so I am growing up at 45 with choices. Thats a good thing Lot of love The bueaty of this program to me is learning from each other and accepting one as they are that is something I have searched for all my life.

January 19, 2005
4:29 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Sounds like your moving in a postive direction Day1..Thanks again for the encouragement..Angel1

January 20, 2005
12:07 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hey guys..I feel pretty good today..
I been having some uneasy feelings.. my mental state has not been very peaceful and this has caused me to think things over very
carefully..when my mental state is not at peace I have a big problem..
I have been upset with my husband for about 2 weeks..we haven't really talked about it and I've been holding on to it..I know this is not healthy for me..I have mentioned it to him briefly and he has tried to turn it on me or say anything to change the subject..I've been praying about it..and I've been talking about it here to you guys..trying to do what I can to let go of it and I haven't been able to..
for some reason when I got home last nite out of no where it came to me as I walked in the door..
I said to my husband..I will be getting our Income tax check in the next 2 weeks and when I do I would like a break..I want you to go see your family..I need a time out..he looked at me as if he couldn't believe what I had said..he said from me I said yes..it kind of surprised me to..but I felt such relief when I said it..it was like all those pent up feelings had gone away..just by me expressing those few words to him..and today I feel so much better and I'm not allowing him to take all the space in my head..when I do this Im not in a good spot and I need to get myself back..it has been a hard 2 weeks but I feel I got myself back by expressing my feelings to him and I wasn't mad when I said it..I was very calm and sincere..I love recovery...Angel1

January 20, 2005
10:30 pm
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

I am glad that you have found an answer for stressful days that you were having. I guess just waiting it out sometimes is the best thing to do. My son came in from work today wasn't suppose to get in until tomorrow. I think he might be doing a snow job on me. He is working has not had extra money. Due to one thing or another. I am getting anxious at this point. I need to let go but it is so hard for me. He has 2 children and is seperated from his addict wife also. I am going to get a part time job hoping this will help me let go of his problems. I need to take care of myself. Anyway I am going to a meeting tomorrow. I am sure that it is a much needed one. Cya soon

January 21, 2005
3:13 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hey day1..yes I feel much better..life is a series of ups and downs..and boy do I love the ups..I plan on getting to my meeting tonite..I didn't go Mon. because it was so cold..but I plan on hitting one tonite..I can't stay away to long..old behavior will creep in and before I know it..life done kick me in the but again..so today I do my best to take care of me and do the things I need to do for me..makes my life much easier..Angel1

January 21, 2005
9:59 pm
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hello guys, I did a meeting tonight and it always helps me. The reading or what someone says helps to bring me back to reallity let go let go let golol I think I will have to hear that the rest of my life. Everything went well today. I just left my house and decided to do something for me. That way I could keep my son off my mind at least some. It is so funny if I don't let go it is like an never ending twirling going on in my mind and not accompllshing anything but when I do let go I sometimes get just what I need. I don't know what the future holds so I have to work on the grattitude list of my blessing. The fact that I don't know shows progress. I use to know everything lol I hope your meeting went well. We discussed resentments. The gradittude list was braught up for the antidote for resentments but I decided to use it on my problesm of worrying about my son. Where I am now and where I have come from says a lot. So I have to let go and Let God. He braught me here and will continue to take care of business very well without my assistance. When I think back about all He has done for me I know this is true Sharing is a wonderful thing and sometimes the answers come through people, other times I need to trust Him and have patience. Yes life is definetly a series of ups and downs and its wonderful being able to choose how to deal with them. Theres lessons to be learned, understanding to learn, and sometimes anger pops its ugly head up. It just to depend on my perspective I guess. Lots of love

January 24, 2005
1:56 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thank you day1..great prespective on life..
My week-end went well..I went to my meeting Friday nite..I felt a little uneasy and I'm not sure why..I have been going to meetings for years and I still am not close to people..I know it's me..I don't know what's wrong with me..I have had 2 sponsors in Al-anon, but since my 2nd sponsor moved away I haven't found another and I know I need to..it's so hard to relate..I pray to find someone..I know I need to talk to someone on a regular basis..that's one of the reasons I share here daily..I know how important it is to stay connected to others and it's easier for me to do it here on this thread..it's easier I'm not as connected..I don't have to get so close..I know I still need alot of work..I pray to get better..I will get to another meeting to-nite..Angel1

January 24, 2005
10:23 pm
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

angle1 I have the same problem. I call my sponser but I can't help but to think what she will think of me if I tell her I am having a bad day. I find she thinks neither good nor bad. The habit of showing someone the not so bright side of myselfe is very scary. I want to change and I am a little at a time. Sometimes I take a step backwards and sometimes forward but that is just where I am today. Is there a way to chat here I don't know to much about the sight. I do understand about the relating to people. I have a problem with trusting people to like me unconditionally. I guess that is something I am starting to learn in alanon. If there is away to chat let me know. I think I could relate with you or we can just keep checking in on each other. I am glad to have met you. Anyway you have a great night day or evening. LOts of Love

January 25, 2005
2:30 pm
Avatar
mj
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi 🙂
I didn't know that you didn't want to get close...interesting thought.

When I first came to this site, I didn't have much support. Through meeting people here, I stretched and started meeting people elsewhere, and now I find I hardly have alone time.

I am glad that I can share openly and honestly with others. I feels good to be real and have others love and accept me for who I am.

Have a good day!

January 25, 2005
4:23 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thank you both for your imput..I do trust the people in my meetings and I can share about myself here..but it's hard for me to build a relationship.. I know it's something in me that needs fixing..I just have to take a risk..and go with it..
Day1 you are so kind..I really do need another friend in my life..I find I like making friends here..I feel very comfortable talking with mj..I think we relate to one another.and I also would love to check in with you Day1..
My day today is not going to well..people really do get on my nerves at times and I need you guys so badly at these times when I feel so frustrated with things outside of me..I know I have no control over other people..I work with another female..she is younger(34)than me (I'm 47)she has been working here longer than I..she is very petty about everything..but she never says anything her attitude says it all..I would rather she say whats on her mind than carry this shit on her back..we have a petty cash box and she is the one that keeps it up..there are times the guys in the shop need change for pop and snacks since the cash sits in a file behind me I give them change when they ask..yesterday she said where's the quarters in the cash box..I said I gave them to the guys for change..she was all upset about that..I said if you don't want them to ask me put a note up on the vending machine..she not only put a note up but she also took the file cabinet and put it in the front office by her..I couldn't believe her..all she had to do was say I will give them the change or have them see me..then she has the nerve to say I don't blame you..but I need to know where the money is..I said the money is in the box I just gave them change..if you count it it's there..she says but I only count it once a month..so know It's about counting the money..at this point she has pissed me off..see I could care less about any of this..if someone needs change I give it to them..I don't keep it because I don't want to count it..people just get on my nerves with this behavior..and know she's really pissed but never will show it..she always wants people to think she is happy, joyful, full of life and she's not..when she answers the phone she real perky..theres nothing wrong with doing a good job but she so phony it just irritates me..and then everytime she talks to you she's always sorry..about everything she's sorry after awhile being sorry gets old..well I'm done complaining..had to get out of my sytem..thanks guys for being here for me..Angel1

January 25, 2005
4:24 pm
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hello, I am trying to learn how to get close to people and understand we are all different but yet all the same. To be who I am good or bad who knows what I think is bad may be given another perspective by someone else.Mj I am glad that you have come to the point where you are. I am working it a little at time. I am so thankful for alanon members like you who are able to help me grow and also thank for those who help me to be open and honest have good day.

January 26, 2005
6:40 am
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Angel it sounds like you had a very trying day at work. It is strange because I think that by going to alanon a person does pick up on things llke being real and true. It is kinda like an insight. This might be part of a growing process. I am also one who likes to get straight to the point without all the cover up or side steps . I think by being aware of myself it just goes on in to the rest of my life. When I ask myself questions like what is going on with me or how do I take care of myself , why am I uneasy the answers sometimes comes fast and sometimes slow. Hang in there I am sure you are able to take care of yourself with the help of a higher power. I don't like time takes time but unfortunatly it does. Bake bread fast and it is ruined, bake bread slow and it will rise to the top and be wonderful and tasteful. Lost love

January 26, 2005
6:59 am
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Perhaps the slogan easy does it will help. My husband and I had a disagreement about a very important personal matter in our lives. At first I blew up, one of my child like behaviors(I learned this from the sight joy2meu) I don't know which one of you recommended it but thanks. anyway, I took some time to find out what I really wanted to say and with the help of my higher power whom I choose to call God, I began the discussion again and the out come was good, my husband truely understood where I was coming from. Even with my husband sometimes I am still scared to be me. The risk was worth it thaugh, it gave me a little more trust in him and myself. Ok finished again I hope you guys have a good day

January 26, 2005
1:29 pm
Avatar
mj
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

My favorite slogan is "One day at a time". The present is our gift.
Hope that you have a great day. I plan on going to my meeting and then to the hospital to help my dear Al-anon friend. We are never alone.

January 26, 2005
2:04 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hey guys..So nice to have friends..
my favorite slogan is
Keep it Simple..it just brings everything to a more manageable size it doesn't seem so big..it instanly shrinks it..
I doing ok today..been doing alot of praying and trying to keep the focus on me..when I can slow my head down and find silence I do so much better..regardless of whats going on around me..this is what I have been trying to do just be silent and keep my mind from going in circles..this is very challangeing when I can do it I stay in a good spot..Thank you guys for being my friends..I really do need you in my life..Angel1

January 26, 2005
6:37 pm
Avatar
day1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Same here guys it is nice to have found this place everyone seems to be doing good. I definetly need friends in my life . Thanks for being here

January 27, 2005
2:17 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hey guys..I'm a little tired today but for the most part I'm doing ok..I went to church last nite..I needed to go..I felt so much better after I left..my day today is going ok..if I just keep myself in a good spot mentally I'll be ok..this person I work with loves playing childish ass games and it is nerve racking..I guess she has nothing better to do..so I need to work my program in order to deal with her since she chooses to act this way..I pray for her maybe one day she will find some peace within herself..I'm grateful to have a place where people understand me..Thank you all..Angel1

January 28, 2005
12:48 pm
Avatar
angel1
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 24, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hey guys..it's Friday..wow it's been a rough week..I plan on getting to my meeting tonite..which will put me in a good space..I also plan on having my grandkids with me tonite..they keep me busy when there around..I'm ready for them..my sister's wedding is coming up I may end up going..I wasn't going to..but I found out the wedding is not in Chicago, it's going about 20 minutes away, so I may just go. Not because I want to but because she is my sister and for that reason I should go..even if no one came to my wedding..know that I've been married to my husband almost 3 yrs..I understand why no one came, but even so they should of come because of me not him. I will try to do the right thing and go..I'm grateful for you guys here..hope everyone has a peaceful week-end...Angel1

January 31, 2005
10:05 am
Avatar
mj
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hi Friends,
Just did my meditations, which is my morning ritual. Keeping a positive attitude helps me stay focussed on taking care of myself.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 349
Currently Online:
24
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 110962
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38560
Posts: 714252
Newest Members:
JayGriffin212, Youse1937, Cannabeme, charli55, SeaG1ant, shawncanwe
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2020 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved.
Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer | Do Not Sell My Personal Information