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Survival of the Afghan....Sisters Live On.....
November 1, 2006
6:40 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I only THOUGHT I was confused before...God help me

November 1, 2006
6:42 pm
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ggfred4
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MICH, what's wrong sis?

November 1, 2006
6:43 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I am so F*CKING confused. I need to go run....wouldn't that be a sight...and I amnot sure that I would stop anything shy of MN.

November 1, 2006
6:46 pm
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ggfred4
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mich, calm down please...do you guys run in the cold outdoors?

do you want to go and talk to me on the other thread??? I am here for you...

November 1, 2006
6:47 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I am not ready to talk yet...and at my weight, you don't run at all

November 1, 2006
6:49 pm
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lovinglife
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Mich- I can't leave the computer with you confused..talk to me...

and GG are you trying to tell us something here in a round about way about the cause of your cluster headaches?! LOL

November 1, 2006
6:52 pm
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ggfred4
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Okay, seriously, you see how I use comedy to avoid serious issues...I feel like I want to cry...I think we three are not connecting or something...I feel like I did something wrong...what is wrong

November 1, 2006
6:56 pm
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ggfred4
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LL, are you here?

November 1, 2006
6:58 pm
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lovinglife
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I've got a funny for you here too...

my son was just trying to get my attention..."Ma, Ma, Ma, Ma...say Lovinglife..." {They know my screen name on here- I also have a shirt that says *Love Life*.} It was funny.

and GG you've done nothing wrong. I think what happens is when we talk about negetive, icky things that have happend to us, another one of us may trigger. I've experienced that a few times on the AAC site. Kind like what happened with you the other day when Mich shared about feeling guilt over the hubby & baby stuff.

Group hug is needed here....

November 1, 2006
7:00 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I love you both, and that is all I can say right now. I can't stay here for a little while...I will be back...I should have left well enough alone..

November 1, 2006
7:02 pm
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ggfred4
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LL, I must have done something to her and now I am crying AGAIN...I need to keep my mouth shut and back away...but then you guys say I am disappearing...can't seem to do anything right lately...help me..

November 1, 2006
7:06 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I made this perfectly clear that it has NOTHING to do with you. Now STOP. I just should have left it alone, that is all that i am saying. My confusion and frustration is getting the best of me, and I AM SORRY. I will be fine, I JUST NEED AN HOUR TO RECOMPOSE MYSELF AND THINK.

November 1, 2006
7:07 pm
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cyndra820
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Group hug coming up:

(((LL, Mich, GG)))

I love all of you very much.

GG Please Note: LL ASKED for a hug!!! Yeah!!

Love you all,
Cyn

November 1, 2006
7:07 pm
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lovinglife
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Mich - you have to quit that. You should never leave anything alone...unless you are talking about YOU having a hard time right now...unless something is causing YOU to lose your strength.

I'm fine and actually feeling much better for some reason, but now I am concerned about you. Damn girl you have a gift.

Ok, I am going to check back BEFORE I leave tonight. I will need to know everyone is fine here or at least still out there and with us : )

November 1, 2006
7:08 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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I am done for the night...I love you all, goodnight

November 1, 2006
7:09 pm
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lovinglife
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(((((MICH, GG, CYNDRA)))))

November 1, 2006
7:11 pm
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ggfred4
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LL, when she hurts, I hurt...

November 1, 2006
7:14 pm
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cyndra820
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The two of you ARE twins!!! Geez, you even think alike. LOL

Okay, I think that after the last week where everyone's emotions were running a bit high we've hit the hypersensitive mode. I SO know this one.

Mich, I'm with LL, don't ever leave anything alone if you don't want to. I understand that you may need to pull back at that particular time, but that does not mean you don't have to persue it later.

I'm going to need the two of you to take on her exh. I'm a munchkin, five feet even, I don't think I can take this guy on by myself. So, don't go anywhere.

LL,
We'll talk to you later. I'm here. I just finished my workout and now have a load of laundry in. I will grab a shower when that's done.

Love you all. I will say that all day long if I need to.

Cyn

November 1, 2006
7:21 pm
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needtoheal
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Hi again girls!!!

Cyndra-- I do not feel that what you said was too harsh.. My son did get to speak to his teacher today since the social worker was not available.. Funny thing is that his teacher is his Godmother.. who I was visiting last night when the kids were with their dad....
He will go talk to the social worker and I am glad because he is able to express his feelings well.. and then she can get some insight on what is also going on...
I do appreciate your opinion.

My ex-husband is my EX for a reason.. He played so many emotionally abusive games with me that I did not have a choice and so I closed the door on him and filed for divorce..
He continued to try to push my buttons after the divorce..
Finally I feel that give him the rope he hangs himself..
My children do know that he is not trustworthy..
I do not speak about him negatively in front of them nor do I even talk about him to others in front of them.
They know this because my son said last night that when he talked to the social worker (conselor) at school he told her that his mother does not talk about his father in front of him but his father's girlfriend does do this... so he can tell her again how this is happening and how he feels about it...

I did not talk to their father tonight about the subject.

He calls every single night and I do not even stay in the same room. I do not want my children to feel as if they cannot speak to their father because I am listening.. I know that if there is an issue my children know that they can come to me and trust me with their true feelings.
We talk every single night after reading and the lights go out.. We call it the "FEELINGS WHEEL".. We each take a turn and talk about how we felt .. It is nice to be able to share.. and they learn to name their feelings... I do not share such burdens to them where they feel sorry for me either because I am alone.. But I am upfront and honest with them about the reality of the situation.. FOr example, after we do our feelings wheel, I will remain in their room for a little while. They also know what the expectations are each night because I tell them ahead of time that after lights go out I still have to go downstairs and do laundry or whatever I may need to finish doing.. or even if I have to watch tv and relax.. or if I am tired I tell them that when the lights go out I am going to bed because i need to go to sleep.

Sorry for rambling on and on...

thank you girls for thinking of me during this difficult time..

I have also ended the co-dependent relationship with the ex-b/f that was emotionally abusive to me (we spent time together not when the kids were around.. did not want them to suffer another loss.. and i did not want them to become attached to someone that i was unsure about ...

thanks and I am grateful to have such caring friends... thanks for sharing the afghan....

with love, friendship & respect
NEED

November 1, 2006
7:23 pm
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ScaredinMichigan
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If I leave it alone, it doesn't hurt like this. Not to mention it doesn't put me in a position to be pissed at people who in all reality don't deserve it. And right now I am, pissed, scared, confused and feeling like my whole world is going to fall apart in front of me. Because I opened my mouth. Which has done nothing BUT hurt people in the last week. So DON'T tell me I shouldn't leave things alone

November 1, 2006
7:23 pm
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ggfred4
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need, you sound better...thanks for sharing...

November 1, 2006
7:24 pm
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lovinglife
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I was just thinking the same thing Cyndra-THEY TRULY ARE TWINS!! And must say the cutest on this side of central standard time : )

I think what we all have gone through here in the last week is going to be a HUGE growth spurt for us. We all have had one hell of a week or so.

Now Mich & GG- if you two can later...please connect up and chat. GG won't be able to sleep without her goodnight story ; )

I am very thankful for having both of you in my life. And you too Cyndra.

Now I am off...and guess what? it's starting to snow again here : )

November 1, 2006
7:24 pm
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ggfred4
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LL< please respond, emergency

November 1, 2006
7:27 pm
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lovinglife
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Mich- you have hurt no one in here this last week.

November 1, 2006
7:30 pm
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cyndra820
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Need,
You do sound better. I like the idea of a feelings wheel. That is wonderful. I may have to get some more information about that for when I have my children. You are a wonderful mother.
I am glad you don't think I went too far. I respect you and your decisions. Sometimes I go a little overboard...

Mich,
Okay, I won't tell you that you souldn't leave things alone. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend you. I don't think you've done any harm to anyone here, if that's what you're referring to.
GG, said she wasn't upset about your pushing her. She said that she understood. If that's not it, I'm sorry, I don't know why you feel you've hurt people in the past week.

Love,
Cyndra

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