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Suggested reading from Ladeska
October 22, 2006
9:11 am
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snowlover
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Hi everyone-

For those of you that have been following the "charmer/abuser thread, you may have noticed Ladeska suggested doing a search on 2 experiments yesterday. They are called "The Stanford Experiment" and "The Milgram Experiment".

If youve ever wondered how you were able to accept abuse in your life, or how your abuser was able to be sadistic at times, then these experiments are something you need to read.

Ive just read thru both of them, and I cant even find words to describe how Im feeling, its too horrific. The links to these experiments online are:

http://www.prisonexp.org/

http://www.new-life.net/milgram.htm

Maybe after some other people read thru them we could have a discussion about our thoughts and feelings in regards to this.

Snow

October 22, 2006
9:32 am
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needtoheal
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oh snow!! ... thank you for bringing this info to my attention.. i will look at it soon... i just went to the thread and was reading some of Ladeska's suggestions to you...
I know that we have corresponded once before and I am inspired by you...

thanks again. I don't know if you read my whole situation which is on the thread "doubleloss.. i am here"

October 22, 2006
9:37 am
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snowlover
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Needtoheal,

Ive just begun reading your thread actually. I work 6 days a week, so I get behind on everyones posts, and try to spend Sunday mornings catching up.

Thank you for saying I inspire you. Ive been coming here for a year now. When i first came here i was suicidal, severaly depressed and couldnt function on a daily basis. I have stumbled soooo many times during this past year, and have went back and forth between dumping and taking back my once again EX BF.

But, the biggest thing that has changed is ME, and my perception of myself and my situation. These 2 experiments Ladeska suggested reading are something I think all of us should look into. Its very quick reading, but the lessons you will walk away from after viewing them I think are priceless.

Snow

October 22, 2006
9:44 am
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needtoheal
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thanks snow for the suggestion...

thank you for reading the thread as well..

This man is currently not calling and that is such a great feeling..
I had been uncomfortable and anxious in wondering if he will call ever again.. but then i had to shift my attention to myself and cannot worry about whether or not he calls because this man is out of my life...

and I have been in the same position as you....... wanting him out of my life, taking him back....

He had behaved the same with me..

He has changed his behavior towards me... not calling when he used to call 5-10 times a day... This is what I think I was having withdrawals from.... He was the crutch for when lonliness or boredom consumed me... Well that is definitely not a problem for me because since coming to this web site I have accepted and embraced the fact that I will never be alone..

thanks and hope to hear from you soon

October 22, 2006
2:30 pm
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red blonde
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Snowlover

Just viewed the Stanford Experiment.
I just hope that those in the experiment went into therapy because of what happened..and that these people were checked every so often later on.

I just felt like so many of us were in prisons. The effect is the same even without bars on doors, etc. The psychological effect..the emotional effect.. the effect it has on one's own being and soul.

That we became prisoners in so many different ways and the guards were the ones we loved and believed that they loved us!

I am kind of in shock

Red

October 22, 2006
2:36 pm
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red blonde
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Milgram's Experiment is very similar to Pavlov's Dog except with a twist. CONDITIONED RESPONSES

October 22, 2006
2:56 pm
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elizabeth anne
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There are many scenerios that underline how psychologically one can undermine your whole being... Patty Hearst kidnapping, The little girl in Utah that was kidnapped..Charles Manson... Haleys comet group... Jim Jones... and the list goes on...

October 22, 2006
3:19 pm
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red blonde
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Makes you kind of wonder if we are actively "conditioning" our own children. Now that is a scary thought. Are we making them victims or abusers?

Red

October 22, 2006
6:03 pm
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Ladeska
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I like this dialogue, very much. We need to think, read history, examine things, question - always.

Without that - we become comsumers and prisoners, or robots.

We need to know who we are, what we are capable of, what we fall prey to, why, how we can protect ourselves and how to be vigilant. But once again it requires constant motion.

Motion - live. In acitvity - death.

The other thing I might add is that - you have much knowledge already recorded in you. The files that went unnoticed, unused, unacknowledged by you. Many masters of the spirit realm, higher self kind of plane of things would say - ask - what it is you want to know because the answer is within you. That's not off base. more than not - it is. You've recorded it. It's just in a dusty library, not being accessed.

We are more than flesh and blood, we are more than our robotic, conditioned responses. Tapping into "that" is something very different for us, but the more we do it - the more acquainted we become - with it.

Just like when I want to remember a name, or where I hid something from myself (smile) I just ask "me" where is it and I put my brain on search and retrieve. How many times do we really do that? Ask ourselves the question, inquiring of our higher self what the answer is? Well one thing for sure is - we won't do that if we've been programmed to and obey - the command that says - don't trust yourself, trust me instead.

What if - there is a wealth of knowledge in your very being, in DNA memory even? What if? If so - then you, as the master of your vessel - should be able to tap into it and ask the question and demand the answer.

But like I've said before - we hve to mean - what we ask and really and truly - want to know. You can fool alot of people but the inner, higher self is another matter.

Call it your connection to God, call it whatever you want to, I really don't care but there is knowledge and a very ancient wisdom there.........and it's for the mining IF you so hunger for it.

October 23, 2006
1:11 am
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Worried_Dad
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The Stanford and the Milgram experiments are classic studies from the viewpoint of Ethics of Research with Human Subjects.

As has been pointed out, they are also classic studies that illustrate the power of the technology of abuse.

IMO, They are required studies for health care professionals. Recommended for everyone else.

And I want to talk about why I think that is true.

October 23, 2006
5:51 am
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snowlover
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WD,

I would love to hear your thoughts on this subject. Ive never read anything such as these sutdies before, and found myself beyond atunned at what take place within both of them.

Im still trying to process what I learned from reading them.

Snow

October 29, 2006
8:52 am
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Tumbleweed8
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WD, Did you post your thoughts on this on another thread? I noticed this one going down and some may want to post more on here.

October 29, 2006
9:02 am
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Tumbleweed8
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From the Gift of Fear, I have been reading these messengers of intuition have been listed which may be helpful in knowing what to pay attention to when some of these are experienced. Nagging feelings, Persistent thoughts, Humor, Wonder, Anxiety, Curiosity, Hunches, Gut feelings, Doubt, Hesitation, Suspicion, Apprehension and Fear.

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