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Social moron
September 25, 1999
10:53 pm
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dagney
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I recently broke up with my long term boyfriend. And we all know how it goes, sometimes you become so attached, so engaged that you kinda drop out of the social arena. So i was looking forward to going back to school, in part, in hopes that i could make some new friends.
And i don't ever remember being very good at this, but i try to communicate and get closer to people and i find these really stupid moronic things falling from my lips. And then the moment after................
So i'm sitting here trying to think about what i could do differently, like not taking myself so seriously all the time, or not being so aloof. I don't know? IF anyone has any suggestions, it would be beneficial.
Thanks, dagney

September 25, 1999
11:21 pm
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Anonymous
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It is sad to hear you refer to yourself as a moron dagney. You are NOT a moron, you are perfect and you need to drop all the stuff that tells you otherwise..memories, tapes etc.
Just find a way to develop more self confidence, trust in self and just BE yourself girl. You are special and have much to offer others.

September 26, 1999
12:42 am
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wonder
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September 27, 2010
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Ditto as to what tears just wrote. I just got off the phone with a few friends who basically told me the same thing. I was upset because I thought that I was soooooo unattractive, blah, blah, blah. They said, "Girl, no one is going love you 'til you love yourself."

I had to remind myself that about 5 years back I was upset all the time because I thought that I would NEVER have friends. It took time and patience but now I have some very good friends and lots of ok friends. It just takes time. BE PATIENT with yourself. BELIEVE in yourself. INVEST in yourself. BUILD yourself up. Everything else will come in time.

September 26, 1999
10:47 am
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dagney
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Thank you both for replying. I tell myself often that i must be patient, and it's a heck of alot easier to say than to carry out. I will not always be in this position, but i always wonder what i can change today to make the future better. I don't want to live for tommorrow but sometimes there is nothing one can do today.

September 26, 1999
11:16 am
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KTHOMAS
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I'm a firm believer in "one day at a time". Sometimes I can only get by "one second at a time". 🙂 Just be yourself...it's okay really. Learn to be comfortable in your own skin. And remember...there are alot of people out there feeling and thinking the same way you are. We are all placed here in this world to contribute something...don't force it...when you least expect it all of the sudden it'll click. 🙂

September 27, 1999
8:20 am
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J. C.
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Dagney,

I was eager to go back to work and school for the same reasons...that is the cravings for socialisation. Anyways, maybe I do say some pretty stupid things sometimes, but so what. If someone can't take that in stride, then they're probably a little snooty anyways. I'll never forget the day these 2 girls gagged and rolled their eyes at me when I asked them to help me with this crossword puzzle. I'm a little bit older than the daytime college crowd so I felt out of place anyways. By the end of the day, I was laughing because they thought I was a geek. I did make friends that semester. A girl who knew my younger brother in high school recognized my name in roll call, then approached me. Turned out, she had a son the same age as mine (which made it easy to forget she was 6 years younger than me). Kids can give you so much to talk about.

I know one thing that worked in class was to approach someone to confirm assignments...next thing you know you will be talking about schedules and routines then your home life and family...

Good luck to you and study hard;)

~JC

September 29, 1999
8:15 am
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davva
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September 29, 2010
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oi!

September 29, 1999
8:49 am
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hazza
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September 24, 2010
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hi dagney,
one way i found when meeting new people is to be happy, but low key. Just going into a canteen and going to a table and saying "hi can i sit here" then just read or something. then next time you see those people say hi again and carry on walking.
It shows people you are friendly but not desperate, shows them that you are okay with yourself. that is the type of person people like to be around,
once you are saying hello to these people each time you meet you will feel more relaxed in making conversation. sometimes we get nervous because we feel that we have to meet someone and make them into a friend straight away. Sometimes just taking a couple of weeks just being friendly near people makes then talk to to you.
Also try to make sure the people you talk to are people you would actually want as friends, do you like the way the behave, do you have similar interests etc.
as others have said here, patience is the key, along with a happy smile!!
Hazza

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