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slapped in the face
June 2, 2005
2:25 pm
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Anonymous
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I just saw Mr. Jack with his girlfriend, and god it hurts so much, it hurts so much and I dont know why, and I feel sooo terrible. I want to cry, I want to email him and scream at him and yell at him I want to rip his heart out so he can feel how I feel.

It hurts so much.

June 2, 2005
2:29 pm
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Hurts_so_bad
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Oh Aces - I am so, so sorry this happened. What a lousy way to confirm he has moved on. Try to remember all the BAD aspects of your relationship with him...it might help get you angry instead of wanting him right now.

I'm sure you won't find this as any consolation - but the way you're feeling will pass. Right now, cry if you need to, punch some pillows, take a hot bath - anything that will help you calm down. Be good to yourself.

{{{{{{{Aces}}}}}

June 2, 2005
2:31 pm
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Anonymous
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It wont stop hurting, I hate him so much. I hate that I ever cared for him, I hate that he ever touched me I hate him so much.

it hurts soo much, and I dont know how to make the pain stop.

June 2, 2005
2:34 pm
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kc30
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Aces, don't try to stop it...let it flow through and burn itself out. It feels like it will always hurt like this right now, but it won't. Just keep hurting and hating out loud.

He's a phucking idiot. I read the things he said and did to you. Don't you think for a second that he's suddenly some standup guy with her. She's getting the exact same idiot that you had...your yucky scraps.

Better her than you...being abused, run down, insulted, criticize, humiliated, belittled and treated like a dog.

kc

June 2, 2005
2:44 pm
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2bstrong
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Aces---

I can only imagine how you must feel! If I put myself in your shoes, I would be screaming like a hideous monster like Godzilla. People would be afraid. It's like poison, I'll bet.

You cry, cry, cry all you want. You're in good company here, and you know we'll listen. Here are some tissues. I bought a case.

Kc's right. Imagine him saying the same jerky things to her that he said to you. Yeah, she's really coming out the winner.

YOU DESERVE BETTER.

2b

June 2, 2005
2:45 pm
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DTEE
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Aces.......sorry you are hurting. Just remember this is a person you do not want to be with anyway. I think in the long run it is good you saw him w/ her. I know its a kick in the gut but its the reality step that will be the final straw. Once you work through this hurt it will be over. Focus on how bad he treated you and how lucky you are to be rid of him. Remember he hasn't changed. He had to find someone else to belittle and hurt because you have been done w/ it for a while....Stay strong...... my thoughts are with you today.

June 2, 2005
2:49 pm
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Anonymous
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What if he is great with her, what if he actually treats her nice and likes her and cares for her, god it hurts, what was so wrong with me?

I can't stop crying and I never cry, it hurts so much.

June 2, 2005
2:51 pm
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kc30
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What do you need Aces? Scream? Cry? Should we call him yucky names? Call her names? Whatever you need to get through this unbelievably hard moment...let us know!

I know how it feels...believe me!! Like someone knocked the wind right out of you...dizzy and can't breath....can't think...can't see...for me it was almost like hyperventilating. It was terrible. God, Ifeel sick for you right now.

You'll get it together....you'll put this away and it will probably be a good thing...like DTEE said the final straw, but right now...you're wounded and need some strength.

We've got your back, girl!
kc

June 2, 2005
2:53 pm
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ACryForHelp
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Go to a Salavation Army and buy a bunch of stuffed animals and take them home, write his name on it, and do whatever you want to it!

Rip it's arms off! Gut it and toss the stuffing around the room! VENT GIRL VENT!

And don't worry! Your hate is normal!

Just chant to yourself - He did it to me, he'll do it to her, it will come back to bite him in the a$$!

No one can go through life hurting others and not get their come-up-ins!

It may take a while and right now he may look all happy but he is an empty person that will EVENTUALLY get ALL that he desirves with intrest!

Don't hesitate to come back here and say ANYTHING you want! We don't judge! We just listen!

Good luck!

June 2, 2005
3:02 pm
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Anonymous
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I wrote an email, but didn't send it, this is what I wrote.

I saw you out with your girlfriend, I have struggled with what our relationship was and how it was, thank you for giving me the motivation to realize you for what you are, and for making not thinking of you and disliking you and getting over you so finalized now.

I hope to god you weren't fucking her while fucking me, I'm sure you were and that just makes you a complete hypocrite and whore. the thought that you even touched me makes me want to throw up, I literally feel sick to my stomach, you disgust me and I will never relate anything positive to you. You are the only person I will ever hate in my life.

And not because you hurt me so bad, or because I cared, because I never really cared for you, I could never care for someone as shitty as you because you are just a shitty person. The people I have cared about like Jacob, and Jacory, and other people in my life they deserve caring because they aren't nasty people. Mainly because you are a hyprocrite and basically you just make me sick. I wish I had never met you. I wish to god, that I had been smart and listened to everyone when they said you were fucked up and had issues and were selfish, uncaring, controlling, and an asshole. I thought you might have had some good in you, but now I realize that you never did and never will. The core of you is black tar.

I wish a lot of things, but most of all, I wish that you disappear. I hope to god I never see you out again. I wish you would just move far away. I truly feel nothing but hate and disgust for you. You are not worth this email even. Thank you for being the piece of shit we both know you are.

I feel sorry for her, now she gets to deal with your nasty shit. I hope she knows what she is getting into. Someone who will cheat on her, and then accuse her of it. Lucky Girl. I am thanking god that it isn't me anymore. Unlike your last ex, I will never think highly of you.

June 2, 2005
3:06 pm
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peacesoul
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Aces you say
"What if he is great with her, what if he actually treats her nice and likes her and cares for her, god it hurts, what was so wrong with me? "

Men like Mr Jack treat every woman the same, He will cheat on her and diss her just like he did you. Cause what he did to you was not personal. It's all about him, not the people he's with.

I think seeing him with another victim will help you move on/get over him much quicker.

I knowt his hurts....oh man, Cry hun,. Scream and get it out.

It will all be over soon

June 2, 2005
3:12 pm
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2bstrong
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Aces--do you have someone you can go talk to right now?

June 2, 2005
3:14 pm
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glittered when he walked
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A&S,

Writing that out (and not sending it) was great! Do you feel better? I hope so.

I hope that in time you are able to get so over him that you will no longer feel hate for him. Wouldn't that be great? Sure, it's probably a very tall order for now but venting the way you have is a path toward being able to say "I have conquered the pain that you brought to my life to the point that I don't hate you."

take care and hang in there.

June 2, 2005
3:26 pm
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Anonymous
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Ughh, I sent the email. I was so angry and hurt.

June 2, 2005
3:44 pm
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sdesigns
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Oh Aces, I sure know how you feel. As you know my ex lives in the same complex as me and I have had those feelings over and over and over again. He's on at least #31 since me, but I've only actually seen about 10 of them. It hurts to the core. I was going to say don't send the e-mail cuz he would probably get pleasure out of knowing it bothers you, but... Where did you see him? Did he see you? I know you don't want to hear this but you 2 did not have an exclusive, committed relationship realtionship so hw wouldn't really be chaeting if he had been seeing someone else, even though in your heart you were committed to him.

I know you hurt badly right now, but maybe seeing this will help you move on, instead of missing him. I know you are angry- believe me I know- and that you wonder if he treats her better. I always think the same thing when I see limp dick w/ someone else. I just have to believe he's pulling the same crap on her and using her, as he did me. but it still makes me feel like i wasn't worthy of him, loser that he is, and what is so special about the new one.
What you are feeling is normal. Its painful, but normal. go ahead and feel it and try to purge him from your system. So Sorry, SD

June 2, 2005
3:47 pm
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DTEE
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I wish you wouldn't have sent the e-mail. He sounds like the type of guy that will just get a rise out of what you said. Quit the "What Ifs" Start thinking what "is"........ He is a piece of shit, he is a dick, he treates women poorly etc. He will treat every women he has a relationship with the same as he did you. He isn't gonna be nice to her or care for here. People like him need victims to feel fullfilled you are no longer his victim. Be glad your done with him and live in that from here on.

June 2, 2005
3:50 pm
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Hurts_so_bad
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It's okay Aces. I think he should know how you feel. It's not as if you're begging him to come back.

June 2, 2005
3:56 pm
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Anonymous
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I would never beg him for anything, he is a worthless piece of shit. I hsouldnt have sent it but I did.

I think that you guys are right, I needed tos ee it to have closure. That in essence was my closure.

He tried to hide the fact that he has been dating anyone and NOW I know.

thank god I know.

June 2, 2005
4:44 pm
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exoticflower
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Oh, Aces. I feel for you. I wish I knew what to say, but i know this: YOu are fabulous, you don't need him, and you don't want what he has, not really. You deserve, and WILL HAVE better. Now don't beat yourself up, and don't beat jack the jerk up, just give yourself a big hug and get better when you can.

June 2, 2005
5:06 pm
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Deena
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Just think he's her problem now....You have every right to be angry. That's what really helps me to get over the pain. So what if you sent an email, what do you have to lose. But let that be it...no more. You need to realize he moved on and eventually you will to. It's okay. It sucks. It hurts. But you will be okay. Think about all the shit you put up with from him, think of all the bad. Don't think about anything good at this piont. Save that for a later time when you are stronger. Your better off without him. Everything happens for a reason.

Keep posting.

June 2, 2005
5:30 pm
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Anonymous
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Thanks you guys, today has really been a tough one, at first I felt my heart just break and now I feel relieved.

June 2, 2005
6:27 pm
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willitgetbetter
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Aces, can I just say something? PLease don't be offended but we have known each other in cyber world for a good few months so i feel I can say what I feel to you.

Firstly, if it still hurts seeing Mr Jack with A N other, are you truly over him?

Secondly, If you were not over Mr J, how come you can sleep with these other guys?

Sorry for being so blunt and to the point but if you still have feelings for someone, how can you open up emotionally and sexually to another man?

Am I truly naive or am I missing something here?

June 2, 2005
6:57 pm
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Deena
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oh aces... I was reading your post from 29-may....all the things Mr. Jack did to you.(well, some of them) Go back and read what you wrote. Right there is enough for you to see he's an ass. You deserve better. I know it's hard but...it will get better. Just think okay, you saw them together, the initial shock is over. So when it happens again, it won't be that bad. ( i hope not!)

June 2, 2005
7:31 pm
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Rasputin
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Sweet Aces,

Do yourself a favor and go through the grief process! Cry, weep, come here & vent. And then start the process of forgiving him. You are hurt, used and abused. You need to forgive Mr. Jack, so that you can move on with your life and start a new clean honest one.

(((Hugs & Prayers)))

June 2, 2005
7:48 pm
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D dog
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Hi Aces - long time no post to. I understand what you're going thru - no, really, I do! All the advice here has been solid, so I don't have much to add...just let it be said that if you were not happy with Mr. Jack in the past, and he has put you through so much s**t, you probably would not be happy with a future with him.

The future alone looks pretty cold and uninteresting, I admit. Scares the hell outta me. But hey - he's just a guy. And a screwed up one at that.

Someone here once posted to me (sorry guys, but I can't remember who): One day you'll find someone who will love ya right! And it's true, cuz you are a pretty awesome person, at least in writing - LOL!

The only thing you need to do is realize that you deserve it!

And that's the hardest thing of all, I think.

Anyway, my thoughts are with you - Take care, girlie.

Woof! - D dog

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