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sick of being codependent
October 23, 1999
9:30 pm
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gemini
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To anyone who cares to join this thread, let me explain "gemini". I was a June baby for a reason. It gives me multiple personality talent. I'm not talking literally of course. "I wear many masks....I can be whoever you need me to be" Sound (or feel) familiar??? Would love to hear from some other codependents if you can tear yourselves away from saving the world ( that was supposed to be lighthearted). I desperately want to discover who I am, how I feel, if I'll ever love someone truly....on and on and on. If anyone wants to join in this endeavor and learn the answers to these same questions for themselves, talk away. It would be nice to know that someone else out there feels as confused as I do sometimes.

October 24, 1999
10:28 pm
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Anonymous
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hi gemini, i dont know if you have noticed but most of the contributors here are struggling with major codependency issues.....
hey guys lets all join up here......lol

October 24, 1999
10:46 pm
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Anonymous
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http://relationshipweb.com/odat/

ATTENTION, ALL CODEPENDENTS GO TO THE ABOVE LINK..

November 3, 1999
7:56 pm
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Newby
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Hi all,
This is my first visit to this particular web site. I just learned yesterday (I'm still in shock) that I'm a co-dependent. I never thought of myself that way at all. I am looking for ways to heal. I'm told I should be on anti-depressents. I don't know how I feel about that at all. I'm the strong one. I'm the person everybody can count on. I'm the bigger person. You can tell me all your problems and I'll try to help you heal. Now it's my turn. It's me that needs help now. I'm trying very hard to accept that I need help. This site is amazing. I'm so glad I stumbled upon it.

Thanks,
Newby

November 3, 1999
8:09 pm
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Anonymous
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Newby, I thought I was the strong one, but I really was just helping others to gain some sense of self which had been taken from me in my family of origin.
Always the caretaker, the giver, the helper, the fixer.......well I resented this deep down and it was my way of avoiding doing the real work......with myself.
It is US who really need the compassion and help, it is us who need to tell everyone to take care of themselves and let go and let god.
It is time for US to GET A LIFE, GET HAPPY AND NOT BE AFRAID TO BE ALONE ANYMORE.

November 3, 1999
8:21 pm
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Newby
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Tears,
Thank you for responding so quickly. My counselor used the same words you just did. She told me to "get a life". Ok, great. But exactly how is that I do that? We do need compassion, we do need understanding, we do need help. It was so hard to ask for it. My family still doesn't completely believe that I need help. I can still put up a great front. Haven't we learned to do that all our lives? I'm just at a loss as to what I want. I don't even know where to begin. I didn't even know I was the one with problems. I thought my problems came from other people (my sister - really long story - she just had a baby with my ex-fiance). Now, all of the sudden, the problems begin in me. I'm continuing with counseling. I hope it helps. I hate to be depressed all the time. It's definatly not what I want out of life. I don't even know why I always have to help everybody. I thought it was because I was a good person and I was a good friend. My counselor wants me to start making a list of things I want to do for me. I don't think I ever stopped doing things for me. I think I just included other peoples priorities in with mine. Who knows? I'm still confused.

November 16, 1999
3:11 pm
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Ava
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Newby and Tears,
What you said really makes me feel like you do understand! Please let me know if you have any great revelations. I just recently figured out for real that I truely am the one that needs help. I too have always been able to help others with their "problems" and it turns out it's me who has been avoiding the fact that I need help and need to start living my own life... instead of through others. Keep me updated!

November 18, 1999
1:22 pm
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mercury
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September 30, 2010
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Hi I had all ready find that I'm a very codependent person. I want to finish it but I don't know how to
stop. It is real painful for me , wasn't easy for many years and i finished in a sycotherapy group, it worked for a while but the codependent is too strong for me that I got codependent from my sicotherapeutic.
Now i am walking as the wind trow me,with non direction .
I want to do a lot thing with my life, planing , thinking but there is my husban changing my ideas all the time,also feel afraid to walk away alone.

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