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Sexual abuse and my Relationship
June 19, 2006
2:13 pm
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unforgetable
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I have not told many people about being sexually abused when I was young but I need some help. I was first sexually abused by my brother when I was 5 years old. I didn't know at the time that I should not be doing what I was doing. I told my mom and she got mad at me and said that he didn't do that and I was a lair. It continued on till the age of 14. I was scared and had no where to run to. I am now 22 and am in a relationship with a guy that treats me like gold but I have problems when we have sex I only think of my brother and I want to stop myself from thinking of him but I cant. My boyfriend know about what my brother did to me and understands cause he himself is a victim of sexual abuse from his cousin. What is bothering me is that I can not get my brother out of my head when we have sex and I am not sure if I will ever be able to. If anyone has any suggestions please let me know.

June 19, 2006
4:20 pm
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chinita
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I'm sorry to hear that. Have you thought about counseling or a therapist? It's hard and I no. There's probably nothing you can do to forget what has happened to you but if you decide to get some kind of help maybe that will help ease the bad memories.

I was also was a victim at the age of 5 by a babysitter and then my own grandfather. So believe me I know how it is.

My Heart goes out to you. It's just a thought about counseling? It helped me. Stay strong.

June 19, 2006
7:00 pm
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sleepless in uk
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unforgetable I agree with chinita.

therapy may be able to help you deal with those memories

take care

June 20, 2006
2:20 am
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daff
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I also struggled with a sexual relationship with my husband. I used to cry after sex every time. MANY years later, after therapy, I can now say that I have a wonderful sexual relationship with him - no ghosts. It truley is worth the effort to heal.
It's great that your boyfrind is supportive.

June 21, 2006
11:08 am
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bowlinggreen
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You may look into a technique called EMDR (eye movement desensitization & reprocessing) that uses light & sound or tapping to get those memories out of the brain...

I tried it with PTSD and it seemed to work.

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