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Serious Decision - Advice
April 1, 2008
1:34 pm
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nevereverihope
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I havent seen my children (4) in five years. I had a breakdown (suicidal, etc.) in hospital (well anyways, my husband, left me broke, nothing..His has influence and needless to say,after fighting for many years and broke from attorneys, I got nothing.No money, no house, and most important, the judge said she really new nothing of my case, but I cant see my children. I had a psychotherapist with me at trial, have been working steadily with a great job, drug tests, you name it..and they said no....(I did have a judge who wanted to set up immediate visitation, but then postponement after postponement and new judge, with this decision. My x has too much money and power to fight in court. Well, I cannot contact them in anyway, if I do my attorneys told me because of his power, I could probably go to jail for 6 months, at least. Well, I'm tired of waiting, should I just go to the door of my home and see them (or wait it out) (I do not think it is fair for these chidren to think I just disappeared - how horrible is that). I truly believe it is in the best interest of my children to know that they have a mom, who has been trying to see them. And when time is right, I will be there for them. Any suggestions would help.

April 1, 2008
1:43 pm
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CAMER
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so does your ex have sole custody of your children and or a restraining order?? cuz i cannot see why you can't at least "talk" to your children.....do you have "any" visitation rights with your kids?

April 1, 2008
2:10 pm
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nevereverihope
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No there is no restraining order. Yes my x has sole custody. He sent my divorce papers (to appear) to a ficticioius address, and got away with it, so I did not know I suppose to appear. He took everything from me. I appealled it twice. They told me Too bad. I worked just as hard for everything. Judge said too bad. He has in divorce decree I cannot have any contact at all with kids, no e-mail, cards, telephoned, nothing.
Yes its very very strange. No one was really able to figure it out.

April 1, 2008
2:30 pm
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Loralei
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Tell your story to the media. Contact local TV news stations, the newspaper, write letters to your state legislators, write to shows like 60 Minutes, Dateline, Oprah. It sounds like your ex is powerful and rich enough to buy off the locals so you have to expose the story.

First, write down everything that has happened, play by play. If there was any wrong doing on your part, own up to it upfront because it will be revealed. Public sympathy can pull a lot of strings.

April 1, 2008
2:57 pm
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MsGuided
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(((nevereverihope)))

I agree with Loralei.
Going public with this may be the only way to prevent yourself from being jailed. For just wanting what is rightfully yours.

The children will be deeply effected by not having you around, being told lies..why?
because he abused you, you tried to leave and this happens?

Expose your X for the exploitive cheat he is, and hopefully someone will pick up this story.
It will publically shame him, and that is what he deserves!
It may get you access to your kids, and maybe some $$ to appeal and win some of your life back!

what he did is montrous.I feel so bad for you.

You are incredibly strong to go on after all this..and still want to fight.

All the best to you!

April 1, 2008
3:09 pm
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nevereverihope
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Thanks for all your support and advice.

April 1, 2008
3:27 pm
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MsGuided
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never.
You've written that you exhausted all avenues.
What else is there left to do?

Wwith the divorce decree, you are considered as breaking the law if you establish contact...why let them victimize and torture you anymore.
It is scary going to the media.But what can exposing this do that is worse than what happened in court?
You will get public support.People will rally around you..YOU NEED some comfort here!
If you are the innocent party you have nothing to lose.

This is such an injustice, and gives "him" the msg he is above the law,m and can do whatever!...Imagine who else he will victimize? How are your kids with a person who would do something like this to their mother!
He is all about control..what kind of love does that entail for them?

I left an abusive spouse a long time ago. He had no influence and though he tried to destroy me, slander, and take my child away I won! I can totally relate to the terror you feel, and the pain you experience now, going through all that!

It's up to you, but I would hate to see you give up.
Regardless of your decision i wish you well, and hope you can recover from this and get back some joy in your life.

Take care! ;0)

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