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SD and all - D dog is back and messed up...
August 1, 2005
11:27 am
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D dog
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Well, H and I did have a talk last night. Went fairly well, he doesn't want to break up with me, he just needs space.

None of this is really even about me - he has just felt "committed" (odd choice of words, there!) to hanging out with me, and is feeling smothered.

He did tell me I was being way too dramatic about the whole thing...I guess I need to stop making everything about "me" all the time, and just realize once and for all that it is he who cannot handle a real relationship right now.

Anway, I need to get a life, this past week has just been too much!

Chillin' -

D dog

August 1, 2005
3:30 pm
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kathygy
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D dog, it seems to me that this is not a good time for you to be trying to have a relationship. Rather its a a time to heal your addiction to alcohol and drugs. And develop a healthy, loving relationship with yourself. Focus on working on you. Its hard if not impossible to have a healthy relationship when you have a problem with drugs and alcohol. They affect what you think and what you say and what you do. Build your self esteem. H. doesn't sound like he's available to you for a committed relationship anyway. He sounds really off center. Take care of you and show yourself you love you.

love,
kathy

August 1, 2005
11:56 pm
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D dog
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Hi Kath.

Ya know what? You are 100 percent correct.

H. invited me over for dinner tonight, so I went (it was great - total comfort food, pork chops, baked spud with all the fixin's, green beans...had 2 glasses of wine (he didn't drink), watched some TV and then gracefully exited.

I'm home now, getting ready to watch a Lifetime movie and hangin' with my cat. No more alcohol for me tonight. I know I need to adopt the zero tolerance policy, no excuses, but stopping at 2 really is an achievement for me, so I consider day one a success. Especially since I played it cool with H., treated him like a simple date, no drama.

If he needs space - well, he's definitely gonna get it now. Because the fact is, I need it more than he does.

Thanks so much for laying it on the line...I know it's not aways what I want to hear, but I can't run from the truth anymore.

Take care -
D dog

:o)

August 2, 2005
12:36 am
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sdesigns
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Hi Ddog: Just checking in. You sound calmer already. Kathyguy is right, as usual. Hang in there, kiddo. You can do it. SD

August 2, 2005
6:08 am
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Rasputin
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D Dog: Ya I like Kathy's advice always concise, on target and to the point. She is right on. It is hard to have healthy relationship with someone who is on drug and booze.

In my earlier post, I was too optimistic. I have never had relationship with someone who was on drugs & alcohol. So, I was not aware of long-term of drugs & alcohol.

I like Kathy's advice, she always gives the truth plain & simple.

Keep us posted, honey!

~Love, RAS~

August 2, 2005
12:28 pm
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D dog
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Well, it's Tuesday. Fell alseep at nine, feeling good.

My goal today is to NOT email H. from work, and to NOT call him when I get home. Easier said than done, as we all know...

Wish me luck!!

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