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Recovering Women: Please Don't Play Too Hard to Get!
December 27, 2005
3:53 pm
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Anonymous
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Matteo,

It was on the capital punishment thread. Maybe that was simply an emotional topic for you, but then so apparently is what I said on this thread, too.

I look forward to hearing back from you.

December 27, 2005
4:01 pm
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kathygy,

I appreciate your honesty with me. You sound like a decent woman, from this and other posts of yours I've seen. You're going to be hard for me to get, though.

Let's do the math. Half a year till the divorce is final (round up to one), two years till you'll date me, two years (I'm guessing on this number) till you certify me as marriagable, one year till the wedding can be held, with reservign the chapel, reception hall, notifying everybody, etc. That means ... let's see ... we can get married in 2012. Nope, too long for me.

Can we shave off a year and elope? That only takes us to 2011. I can wait THAT long. :o)

December 29, 2005
3:16 am
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Lass,

I'm sorry it took me so long to get back to you. It's funny you'd mention that book (I Kissed Dating Goodbye) -- I recently read it myself! Not only that, I have recommended it to two other people on this site.

Yes, it's a good book. No, I'm not sure I'm ready to fully implement its advice, after the divorce goes through. But it has changed my thinking toward dating and women. I'm going to focus more on forging friendships with women and men, pray, and let God direct me as he will.

December 29, 2005
3:21 am
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bonita,

It's was good to hear from you. Sorry I didn't reply earlier.

I'm glad you had a better Christmas than usual. My Christmas turned out better than I thought it would. I didn't get many presents, but it didn't bother me in the least. I sure enjoyed shopping for and wrapping the presents I got others. I think I learned what it means when it says, "It's more blessed to give than to receive."

December 29, 2005
3:23 am
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Lass,

I wanted to add: "Happy upcoming birthday!" I know I'll likely forget to say this if I wait until January, so I thought I'd say it now. By the way, I'm not far behind you in age, only nine months younger. Take care!

December 29, 2005
3:29 am
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2alone,

I'm very sorry about not answering you sooner. I'm also sorry to hear you're in a similar predicament. Marriage was meant to last for a lifetime, and there's something sad about even the worst marriage coming to an end.

You and I have been separated from our spouses for about the same amount of time, then. I find I blow hot and cold -- sometimes I get desperate to find another mate; other times I can honestly say that it feels good to make friends with the opposite sex and leave it at that.

And you're right: I won't settle for anything less than I should.

Keep me posted on developments with you, okay?

December 29, 2005
5:22 am
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feline
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I have been separated for 11 months after being with my x for 25 years. The thought of dating scares the crap out of me. Just don't think I could go there.

December 29, 2005
11:47 am
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kathygy
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seek,

first of all I wouldn't round 6 months up to a year. That would be skipping very important 6 months.

2012 is too far away for me too. I want someone who is fully available and fully emotionally free of all exs' now to develop a relationship.

thanks for the compliement.

love,
kathy

December 31, 2005
4:08 am
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feline,

I'm sorry to hear about your separation. Believe me, I've found out that dating isn't all it's cracked up to be.

It's too bad we couldn't all have had a healthy, emotionally available mate and stay with them the rest of our lives. That's the way it was surely meant to be.

kathygy,

{Sob! Boo hoo!} Okay, I'll cancel the chapel reservations. Oh wait, we were going to elope. Never mind. {blowing nose}

Well, I'll never be the one for you, but at least we can be friends. That's a good deal in itself. But if you're still available in 2012, drop me a line, okay?

December 31, 2005
7:16 am
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bonita1
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seeker!!

Don't you know that marriage bites??? LOL Just call me gunshy....

~~bonita

January 1, 2006
4:01 pm
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Hi Bonita,

Marriage may bite, but even a good single life with a good partner also bites. Single life's like a plane lumbering down the runway, almost at take-off speed but never quite getting there.

I agree; marriage by itself won't solve one's problems. But if you both work at it, despite its ups and downs, it will be more satisfying than single life ever could be. IMHO.

I've been thinking things over and I'm not overly anxious to rush back into marriage. I'll work toward that end, but take things slowly. And the hardest part is to trust that somebody suitable will be there when I'm ready.

January 1, 2006
4:03 pm
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Hi Bonita,

I've been thinking things over and I'm not overly anxious to rush back into marriage. I'll work toward that end, but take things slowly. The hardest part is to trust that somebody suitable will be there when I'm ready.

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