Avatar
Please consider registering
guest
sp_LogInOut Log In sp_Registration Register
Register | Lost password?
Advanced Search
Forum Scope


Match



Forum Options



Minimum search word length is 3 characters - maximum search word length is 84 characters
sp_TopicIcon
Really difficult
June 6, 2007
11:22 am
Avatar
seriously27
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Hello, My girlfriend of 2 years and 6 months just recently broke up with me and I am having an extremely difficult time with it. She is a little younger than me and was still in school. We pretty much lived together and she moved out and went back home for the summer. Now I only moved down here about 9 months ago and have only really hung out with her since that time. Now I am really particularly lost and alone. Also, she has found another guy to like in this short amount of time. I know these are really unconnected thoughts but I have also had a hard time getting over people and things and am worried that because this was a longer relationship that these intense feelings are not going to go away. Also, I have been prone to deppression before we started dating and I already feel myself going back to it. Because it is easy to just sink into it.

June 6, 2007
11:41 am
Avatar
fantas
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 14
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

((((Seriously)))) I am sorry that you are going this. Breakups, even those where the relationships were reaally bad, are always difficult and painful. You are literally mourning the loss of the previous relationship with her. Accept that and allow yourself to feel the pain without judging it. You have to take care of yourself and do those things that will help you go through this process and gently as possible.Work out are really helpful. I probably wouldn't do this, but some people often take antidepressants to ease the pain of this. Whatever helps you and doesn't hurt you, do it. May I ask what the circumstances of your break up?

June 6, 2007
11:45 am
Avatar
feelingfree
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 30, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Seriously~

I'm so sorry you are going thru this. Breakups really suck.. and I understand your concern of sinking into depression- especially since you are prone to it. But the good news is~ you RECOGNIZE this as being a possibility.. are aware.. and can do things to nip it in the bud, so-to-speak.

First~ know that you are not alone. We've all been there. Everything you are feeling is NORMAL. It is typical to go thru alot of different emotions at this time.. from sadness, to anger, to self-blame, etc. It's all part of the process you will need to go thru to get to the 'healing' stage.

My best advice is to be gentle with yourself. Lean on your friends, family when you need support. Try to NOT contact the ex in any way.. as that ends up prolonging the healing process. Do things for yourself- even if you have to DRAG yourself to do it (which is usually the case).
When you find yourself feeling down.. or sinking in to that depression- call a friend, or post on this board.. whatever.. anything to get out of that mindset.

Give yourself time to feel all the feelings you need to.. I do not suggest jumping right into another dating relationship unless you definitely feel strong enough to handle that. Sometimes we do that just to 'feel better', and it ends up being over before it started because we're still dealing with the painful feelings of the last breakup and aren't emotionally ready for another one.

Don't know if you enjoy reading- but there are tons of books out there about dating/relationships/breakups that might have good suggestions for this time as well.

You will be ok.. it just takes awhile.. and remember- there is no 'set timeframe' on how long it takes to get over a breakup.. so again- be gentle with yourself during this time.

June 6, 2007
3:49 pm
Avatar
seriously27
New Member
Members
Forum Posts: -1
Member Since:
September 27, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

Thanks for your support. Well unfortunately she has broken up with me before but after a little time she came back to me. I know that this time it is different because she has friends and family to keep her from being bored and wanting to come back. The reason she broke up with me according to her was that she wasn't as happy as she thought she should be and wanted to break it now instead of getting a divorce later on. We had actually been planning on getting engaged this summer so I was very suprised when she broke it off completely and has already found a new guy to rebound with.

June 6, 2007
4:20 pm
Avatar
fantas
Member
Members
Forum Posts: 14
Member Since:
September 29, 2010
sp_UserOfflineSmall Offline

(((Seriously))) It's hard to see it but count your blessings. I was engaged to be married and I broke it months before the wedding but I knew I didn't want to get married. I am still not married almost 15 years later. He was very upset and he wanted to get back and did all sorts of crazy things. I can tell you that had I gotten married out of pressure or any other reason I would be divorced today. No doubt about it. Some people move from one relationship to another. Often times it's unhealthy because they haven't shut on chapter. So feel the feelings, and nurture yourself. Keep posting.

Forum Timezone: UTC -8
Most Users Ever Online: 247
Currently Online:
29
Guest(s)
Currently Browsing this Page:
1 Guest(s)
Top Posters:
onedaythiswillpass: 1134
zarathustra: 562
StronginHim77: 453
free: 433
2013ways: 431
curious64: 408
Member Stats:
Guest Posters: 49
Members: 110935
Moderators: 5
Admins: 3
Forum Stats:
Groups: 8
Forums: 74
Topics: 38542
Posts: 714222
Newest Members:
jessicawales, documentsonline, SafeWork, thomasalina, genericsmartdrugs, 才艺
Moderators: arochaIB: 1, devadmin: 9, Tincho: 0, Donn Gruta: 0, Germain Palacios: 0
Administrators: admin: 21, ShiningLight: 572, emily430: 29

Copyright © 2019 MH Sub I, LLC. All rights reserved. Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Cookie Policy | Health Disclaimer