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questions about counseling
March 25, 2009
3:47 pm
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sunshineandwater
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September 24, 2010
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I took some advice from this site about seeking a counsler. I'm filling out paper work and one of the questions I'm torn by answering. Have you been sexually abused by a family member. I was by my father 26 years ago and in some of this paperwork it says she will report present or past abuse. So I would like to know what that means. I did tell my mom and the reaction i got out of her made me keep my mouth shut. It has taken me 20 years just to tell my husband about it and he is the only one that knows. I want to talk but very confused about paperwork.

March 25, 2009
3:55 pm
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fantas
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September 29, 2010
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Sunshineandwater,

My understanding is you do not have to give any information you do not want to. I also think that because you are an adult, she cannot just go to the police without your permission. I think that disclaimer applies to minors.

Perhaps you can consider this issue a little differently and ask yourself if reporting your father for what he did 26 years ago, is such a horrible thing. You no longer need your mothers protection or permission to do whatever you like. You have a supportive husband who I'm sure would welcome the idea. What are you afraid of at this point of your life? It sounds to me like he is still holding you hostage. I'm sure that your relationship with your father is strained and will continue to be. So it can't be an attempt at salvaging that relationship.

As far as you know, were you his only victim?

March 25, 2009
3:59 pm
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PreciousG
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I would talk with my counselor about that before I write anything down. I would ask for clarification about what they mean by past. As there are statute of limitations on past abuse. I think that question aplies to children not adults.

If children reposrt abuse, by law the counsleor is required to report it. As an adult I think that you can request that the abuse not be reported.

I wish you all the best.

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